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  1. #1
    motoxracer801 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default mixed signals, shes "not looking for anything"

    dating advice, friend zone, text game, re's my story. So I was walking through our local grocery store and came across this really cute chick who works there. She was talking to her friend. I walked up and said "excuse me could I borrow you for a sec? I got a question" she responds "yes, how can I help you"? I said "i've seen you in here a time or two and think your really cute. Could I get your number"? With no hesitation she says yeah, smiling big the whole time. Well I text her the next day and we text until 12 that night. Well then I text her the following day again. Then the third day she text me. Well yesterday neither me or her text. Well today i sent a message saying "hey, hope your day was good" she never responded. So at 9 tonight I sent her a message that said "hey, your not to talkative today. If you don't want to talk just let me know. I think your cute and all but I don't want to be the guy that doesn't get the hint. So if I'm bugging you let me know." Well she responded back saying "hey. No your not bugging me but I do need to be honest. I don't want to lead you on. I'm not looking for anything. I'm not trying to be rude so I hope I didn't come off that way." I responded back telling her that she wasn't rude and that I wasn't looking for anything either. That me and my ex just broke up 2 weeks ago and that I just thought she was cute and wanted to get to know her. She responded "oh okay. I thought you were looking for something lol" I told her again "nope just going with theflow these days". I asked her if she had a facebook. She said yes do you? I said yes. She looked mine up but didn't add me. I said so your not going to add me? She said "no I don't get on it enough" well my phone automatically finds my newly added contacts. So little did she know I already seen her very private facebook. She didn't have any guys on any of her pictures or anything but it seems like she wanted to keep her fb private from me. Why did she take her time looking mine up to just "look"? This first few days we text it seemed like she was dropping subtle hints. Things like "i love going to movies" or conveniently having things in relation with me. So what the Heck happened? She seemed interested when she met me. She seemed interested but shy the first few days of texting. Now, she doesnt seem interested and dropped the "im not looking for anything" line on me. So fellas, what do I do and what do y'all think? Thanks for the advice.

  2. #2
    ShoreGuy28's Avatar
    ShoreGuy28 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: mixed signals, shes "not looking for anything"

    I'd love to help out but can you please simplify the story and seperate it into smaller paragraphs please...it will help all of us out in giving you the best advice possible!

    Thanks
    "She'll forgive you for being a man...but she WON'T forgive you for being a p*ssy"

  3. #3
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: mixed signals, shes "not looking for anything"

    I mean this in the nicest way possible. That was a train wreck my friend.

    Whenever a woman starts a text with "Hey, if I'm bugging you just let me know....." I just want to throw up. It instantly gives me this feeling that they have low self esteem when I genuinely been busy. Not because I don't want to talk to them. Always assume attraction. Always.

    The next thing is you mirrored her response when she said she wasn't looking for anything serious. In some cases this is ok, but it felt like it came from a place of reacting to her rather than genuinely not wanting something serious. Remember women see through stuff better than men. So if your just reacting to her, she'll most likely know.

    A better response would've been "Seriously? Ah because I was kinda hoping we'd go to Vegas this weekend and get hitched. Do people still say getting hitched?" You've ignored her statement and brushed it off. That's a strong frame.

    They're a few reasons why she would say that. NONE of them are set in stone. She could not want to look like she's easy, not want something serious WITH YOU, or is hanging onto an ex bf. Who knows. So who cares. Ignore it and push through.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  4. #4
    DublAK2 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: mixed signals, shes "not looking for anything"

    to piggy back Batman you also said "I guess your not talkative today" Come on dude. I suck at this but I would never text a chick that, it screams insecure.

    Stop texting her "how are you" "I hope your day is going well" all those niceties

    The only time I will text a girl is if I have something completely random and funny to say, or if I am trying to meet up with them face to face. I haven't asked a girl "how are you" in a long time.


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