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Thread: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

  1. #1
    ItsRaySuper is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Cool How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    Gentlemen.. Ive been taking out randoms HBs for a while now and im starting to hate how much of a toll its taking on the wallet. I find it really hard to not spot the entire night without looking cheap. Food, Cover charges, Drinks... And when all is well a room. Expensive as hell. Anyway I just wanted to pick your brain on that guys appreciate it!

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    Fuser is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    Interested in this also! Feeling cheap isnt fun lol

  3. #3
    serendipity is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    do you also pay the food for the whole set ? are these chicks your playing or also friends ?

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    Rando9009 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    This can be a hard one especially on first dates. Because it seems to me like 99% of the time the guy is kind of expected to pay on a first date.

    Try first taking them out to something fairly inexpensive, like the usual coffee meet, or just go out for a couple of drinks... shouldn't be too bad then money wise.

    The best girls, in my opinion, offer to pay/split on occasion without you having to worry about this.

  5. #5
    sidewinder89 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    You are not expected to pay! It is the 21st century any girl that gets pissed about not paying her half is not worth your time.

    Offer to pay for things when it matters rather than when you might be expected to... It will have much more impact!

  6. #6
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    Default Re: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    Try this:

    "Call me old fashion, but I have to sleep with a girl at least three times before I'll buy her dinner" -Barney Stintson

    Jk jk don't say that lol

    But srsly tho, I don't think I've ever closed a chick after a date where I paid (unless we agree she'll get the next one or the drinks after) and I don't think I've ever gotten even to C3 unless the chick payed for at least her half. The trick is to be unaffected by societal norms. You are the alpha of your life, society does not dictate to you, and you have decided that you don't pay for your date. Period.

    90% of the time, if you simply walk up to the register without glancing at her, say "ticket for one" as if you're going alone, pay and step to the side and let her get hers then 70% of the time she won't even mention/question/or tease about it.

    If she does you can say something about how yoir sister is a femenist and would yell at you if she knew you paid for yourself; you could say that you have waaay too many first dates with women for it to be reasonable to pay for them all; you could say that if a girl goes 50:50 on a bill you always give her major props and "big girl pants" respect; you can play up the "oh is this a date?" tension; or you can just be like "well I need to go on a few dates with a girl before I know if I'll buy her a drink " - which then sets you up to pick up a six pack on the way to her house.

    Point is: be unaffected / don't pay until she's shown she's worth it.
    DTF HB's omw 2 LTR

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    Default Re: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    Who says it has to be a date? Tell her if it was a date then she'd be paying for everything. It is the 21st century lol.

    If you want to be nicer about it then split things. Tell her that you'll cover food and she'll cover drinks. Tell her you'd let her pay for everything, but you don't want to feel like you owe her something at the end of the night.

    I like the ones that think old school. They are the ones most judgmental because you aren't paying. And just like Juggler says, every judgement is a commitment. You want her judging you so she is mentally and emotionally investing in you.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  8. #8
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    Default Re: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    Make a game out of it. Play napkin chess with the tab on the line. Play the five question game for cover. rock, paper, scissors, lizard,.Spock for cab fare. Fix the games and take dives until you both have invested roughly the same amount.

  9. #9
    ItsRaySuper is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    Awesome guys. All duly noted. Although the best girls offer to pay for themselves, I will NEVER disqualify a girl from a f-close because she didnt lol.

    Serendipity: No this is for first dates only.. not sets. I find it much easier to get into paying for herself once weve hung out already.

    Atlas: lizard, spock? lol please do explain. Games are my tool of preference.

    So word of the day (as always) is alpha.. RGR THAT... and "big girl pants respect" is solid gold.

  10. #10
    The Red Baron's Avatar
    The Red Baron is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: How to not pay for everything and not seem cheap?

    I used to never pay for a girl, but I've been succumbing to this recently too and making myself get out of it.

    I'll buy a round, then tell her she owes you a beer, or the next round. It's simple, when you hand her her drink, just turn, smile, and say "next round's on you"

    I made a date walk back to the car to get her purse so she could pick up the next round. Yea, I felt rude, but... I don't want girls assuming i'm going to pay, and she turned out to be cool as hell after.

    I invited another one out for a beer, and she ordered drinks and food and just sat there when the bill came. I payed like a chump, but had an immediate conversation about expectations and assumptions, which she accepted. Truth is I dropped her pretty soon anyway.

    Lesson i've learned, the girls that expect you to pay really aren't that cool. And if every other guy pays for them but you make them pay their own way, you gain alot of value, you're not the sap chasing them like everyone else.
    Never need praise, sympathy, or approval




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