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  • 1 Post By big_irish

Thread: Help! Farked up big time. Any way to salvage this?

  1. #1
    batsy is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Help! Farked up big time. Any way to salvage this?

    I know you guys are going to burn me for this. Flame away, I deserve it.

    I've been seeing this girl for 4 months when she was still together with her live-in bf followed by 1 month break for her to sort her sh1t out. Followed by 2 months dating now. We're not exclusive as she just broke up and "does not want a relationship".

    Last weekend we spent 4 days abroad together all was good and she was at my place yesterday (national holiday). For 8 hours until 10.30pm she said that she can't stay over as she has two job interviews tomorrow (which was true). No sex.

    I met her today for drinks near her place and sh1t hit the fan. It all started when she showed a coaster from a sushi place she went earlier and cook wrote his number on it and said he does private stuff as well. This I played cool like I didn't mind. Then she brought up that she met her EX during the week (1 or 2 days after we got back) and he visited her flat. We've been doing unprotected sex (yesyes I know) and since I know they didn't use anything but pill back in the days I wanted to know if they did it without contraception. She said I have nothing to worry about. I laid my cards on the table and said that I like her and I don't want her doing other guys as I won't deal with this (sigh). I continued to press her and she said it's none of my business.

    I felt like it's my business as they did it w/o condom before. Went totally AFC and said she can't have the boyfriend benefits (we're doing A LOT of couple stuff) if she is farking her ex in the meanwhile as she is still attached to him. She did not deny or confirm anything followed by "maybe not from you". I continued to question her until she got fed up and left.

    Wait, AFC continues. I called after her as she was walking away on the street, she picked up and I told her to wait. She wanted me to stop following her (I was standing at the street) and said she does not want me at her place and quite soon hang up.

    Wait, there's more. I sent her a text shortly after this: "Well this is it for us. It was fun until it lasted. Happy holidays". Obv no response. Then on my way back home I deleted her number and and Facebook.

    Now, I'm torn. I really don't want to lose this woman but she obv wants to fark other guys as well and does not want to commit. I can't sleep. I'm AFC. Is there any way I can salvage this? Should I? Obviously I must force myself to meet other women asap to get over this as my feelings are much higher than hers.

    But, is there any way to salvage this? Is there a play? Flame and laugh all you want, I deserve it and I will learn from it but some help here is really needed.

  2. #2
    Fuser is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Help! Farked up big time. Any way to salvage this?

    Okay dude things were bad, but when you followed her on the street, called, and texted, that was it.I think you answered your own question.

    You are a man of value, other girls would be delighted for you to pick them up. So go do it. Whatever if she is right or wrong, I think you should not even attempt to get her back. You clearly want different things.

    Obviously she knew it was a jealousy attack. If her having unprotected sex with her boyfriend at the time bothered you, then you would have asked before you fucked her without a condom.

  3. #3
    Xmrider is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Help! Farked up big time. Any way to salvage this?

    Been in your situation... and I understand that it is not a good feeling. Just as Fuser mentioned you are a man of value and that there are many other girls that would appreciate such qualities.

    Question is whether you think she is really worth salvaging what you had with her! Was the sex that good? I'm sure you will have better! Does she appreciate your qualities? I am sure that she does not! So is she worth the effort? Definately not!

    Whether you want her back or not your mindset has to be that you are of higher value. That means you have to have an attitude that you have other options and that you are not clinging to get her back.... but don't meet other girls and talk about her! Work on yourself so that you are the one that chooses and not that you are the chosen one! So no AFC actions anymore!

    It might sound contradictory but once you are over her only then your chances of getting her back rise significantly.

  4. #4
    Cypher is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Help! Farked up big time. Any way to salvage this?

    I don't have much experience in PU yet. But, what I do have plenty of experience in is "Farking Up". My suggestion is to take it a day at a time and focus on not making it worst by trying to get her back. Time heals wounds and picking up new women should speed up that healing.

  5. #5
    big_irish is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Help! Farked up big time. Any way to salvage this?

    as long you learn from it, it isn't a bad thing.


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