So what's happenin everybody.
Ok, so there's this girl, HB9, I've been talking to lately and we have been bouncing between friends and more for about a month and a half. 2nd time we hung out I could have full montied but didnt because I wouldn't respect her after. 3rd time she was too wasted and I told her that. Next day she denies that she would have, I'm like, "yeah ok." ha.
So since then I have pushed real hard and been extremely verbal w my intentions, sending her explicit texts, etc. She said she was into it at first, but when we hung out I feel that it put so much pressure on her to put out w all of these indicators of expectations I put on her. She said she wanted to jus be friends after I tried messin around w her. Then I was in a pouty mood and told her im not lookin for another friend.
She said she didnt know why she didnt want to mess around, she said she thinks im hot, shes attracted to me, im totally her type and she feels that she is already gets all of the companionship qualities from our friendship that she doesnt want anything else. I was like fark. So then she got sad, then mad and said so you dont want to hang out w me unless I mess around w you. I was like, uhhh, well Im just lookin for more than a friend.
Anywho, I decided that she is a pretty awesome person and I would be happy to be friends w her because I really do enjoy her company. That next morning(she spent the night), I asked her to rub my back, saying hey thats a friendly thing. She said of course, then she fell asleep on me. Then she woke up and i was cuddling w her and said screw it and pressed myself on her thinking oh well, why not. I tried not to at first it was just natural. She responded positively to that, started pushing back and I ended up getting oral sex. Before that escalated quickly, she said you arent going to think anything different of me are you? I said, no, absolutely not. She said you arent going to get mad if you see me making out w other guys are you? I said nope. I would have said anything at that point to just keep going. Im sure you guys know how I felt at that momemt.
That was fun, then the next time we hung out we messed around again. Not a whole lot of kissing(barely any actually), but she let me do some stuff to her and let me finish. Btw, prior to this second time messing around she said she thought it was weird I'm not out there trying to get laid more. I said I am trying and am talking to more girls now than I ever have. I told her I was dating and had many prospects. I then felt it was a good idea to make up a story about how one of the girls came over and I got laid. She wanted details but I only gave her a little. HB9 is pretty horny chick and is highly sexual. Then for real this other girl wanted me to come over that night too, so I told her about that too. After I told her about me being w 2 girls in one night, I told her I didnt lay the 2nd girl, she became more interested.
Now that she is more aware of these girls she seems highly interested. So then she came over last friday to meet my sister and afterwards we went back to my place and we messed around for a while. She told me that I better have sex with her in the future and do her right. I played it off like casually and said you got it.
It was nice and she said she had a wonderful time. Then she came back on Sunday and was stroking my cock through the whole movie, we didnt end up doing more but it was cool.
I realize that I was expecting too much before and this was the unknown feeling of why she couldnt explain why she didnt want to mess around w me sexually. She didnt want to be the only source of a friendship and a sexual partner. To much pressure on her and too needy by me. So then she invited herself over the next night to watch batman and I said, nah you have finals, she said no its ok. I told her I would think about it.
She ended up coming over, and to be honest I did expect something to happen. We got in my bed to watch the movie and I gave her plenty of room in between and she walked her hand over to mine and started holding my hand, rubbing it and playing with it. Then we started cuddling and she fell asleep on me. I was like fark it, ill let her sleep. Then she woke up and I put my hand on her and shes like, ahhh and shook it off. I was like wth. Anyway after a few more times over the next hour I was like well thats a turn off, shes like "good!" I was kinda bitter and she called me out on it, I was really trying to be cool and be like, "I understand" but it didnt work out too well. Then I go in the living room and shes starts rubbing my hand and my neck and back and said why arent you being my friend right now. I said I am. Anyways, she left to go home.
I was pissed and wanted to say something the next day to her about it but I am also trying to remain drama free these days and felt that it wasnt a good idea. I just played it off like nothing happened at all. This was the best choice.
She has told her parents about me and they are cool w her coming over and spending the night, etc. I dont know exactly what she told them but she says she feels good that she doesnt have to lie to them about what she is doing.
Her and I text every day for the last 1.5 months and lately we have been talking on the phone alot too. She knows that when I dont call/text her that I am more than likely with another girl. I know this because once I told her that I had a date last night and shes like " I KNEW IT" in a joking manner.
So we are going to be spending a lot of time together in the near future. She knows I am talking to 7 other girls, but I havent been talking about them much. I think she thinks things are fizzling out with them because of the amount of attention I have been giving her. It's just so natural for us, we get along awesome and we both really enjoy each others company.
Tomorrow, we are going to dinner and then going to a casino, she wants to gamble for the first time to experience it. We have something else planned in a couple weeks and i said, hey its cool if we split the hotel room right, she said of ccourse. Even though i really really like this girl, not sure if shes gf material or not yet, but I dont want to let her know all of this. I am sure she believes that I really like her but I need to pull back a little in that dept. especially since she put my hands off her the last time we chilled.
Q #1. So my question is this, when we chill tomorrow, I KNOW she is going to be touching me and holding my hand and stuff in the car and wherever we are. My friends say that I should take care of biz before I hang with her so I wont be so horny and expecting and just casually brush her off. Like if we are sitting down and she goes to hold my hand or rub my leg which I know she will, just calmly get up and grab a glass of water or something. Or if something starts happening start a conversation to kill the mood. Let her know that she cant have me whenever she wants, but do it in a way where its not intentionally trying to reject and hurt her out of retalliation from her previous encounter with me.
I think this is a good idea. Girls want a chase. They want what they think they cant have. I need to reverse the roles somehow and I cant be chasing her. I have been in so many relationships in the past where I am chasing them and it sucks.
Q #2. Also, we have been texting today and I was thinking of mentioning how this one girl im talking to is psycho and after hanging out with her 2x she isgetting all pissed that I am seeing other girls. Not sure if and when I should mention the other girls I am talking to in order to reinforce the fact that I am not putting pressure and expecting a bunch of sh1t from HB9.
Q #3. One last thing. Should I send her a text or call her saying something like, hey I dont want you to get the wrong idea about all of these fun things we are going to be doing in the near future. I want you to know that I'd be more comfortable in splitting the costs with you(especially since I know dont buy a girl anything until after you have slept with her, as a reward), because I am still in date mode and don't want you to get the wrong impression. Or do you think that I shouldnt even say anything at all? I know she doesnt make a lot of money and I dont want her to be caught off guard when we do these nice things hoping i will pay. I dont think she would anyway, but I feel maybe saying something will also help come off as more of a chase and convince her that I am not as interested in her as she thinks.
Please let me know what you guys think. I really appreciate it.