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  • 1 Post By meteora
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Thread: I'm in love and I can't move on please help

  1. #1
    startinglife is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default I'm in love and I can't move on please help

    I have been working with this girl for about 8 months at a bar. I thought she was one of the most beautiful girls I have ever met when I first saw her, but she was with her boyfriend. I'm a good looking guy and I have always been flirty with her. Fast forward a little bit, I got injured and took 3 months off of work. In that time she had broken up with her boyfriend and when I came back to work she gave me more IOIs than ever. I was a fucking idiot and never capitalized on it. She is a 10 and I was too careful and too busy trying to play hard to get and playing it cool since she literally gets hit on by hundreds of guys a week.

    Now, she is kinda seeing someone. She told me they have feelings for each other and they have hooked up, but she doesn't want to date him yet and take things really slowly. She says she likes him because he is honest and she can talk about anything with him. Also they both grew up with similar childhoods divorced parents, etc. I truly can't figure out if she's not dating him right now to really take things slow so that it doesn't get messed up or she is just not sure about him and don't like him enough to date him yet.

    Either way, here is my situation...I have fallen in love with her. I have never ever felt this way about a girl. She is literally the most beautiful girl I have ever met in my eyes and she has the most genuine personality that I have ever come across. I know what you are thinking... you just have oneitus and you just need to fuck other girls, but I really believe this is different. I can't stop thinking about her and it kills me that I missed a good opportunity to make her mine and the fact that she liked me at one point is driving me crazy. This is the first girl I think is absolutely marriage material and want a future together with her. She is the most genuine and REAL person I have ever met. She is very honest and there is NO BS with her.

    Bottom line is I don't know what to do. I have tried to think about other girls, but it always comes back to her. I find myself comparing her to every other girl and I can't seem to get interested in anyone else. I don't want to get another girl because I'm afraid if she sees me with someone else it will kill my chances with her for good. What do I do? What is my best chance to get her? I really want to straight up tell her how I feel and that I am crazy about her. She is the kinda girl that appreciates no bs honesty. I wanted to let her know how I feel before she starts dating him for good. Or would spilling my heart out destroy my chances with her for good? Is hooking up with other girls and just maintaining a flirty vibe with this girl really the best chance to be with her in the end? I have to see her almost everyday and it's killing me. All I know is I want her more than anything else and I need to do SOMETHING about it now. Please help me

  2. #2
    meteora's Avatar
    meteora is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: I'm in love and I can't move on please help

    i think you need to take a good look at what you wrote. you sound freakin crazy! you love this girl after only knowing her for how long??? 6 months?!? no offense but she is just like the rest of the girls out there and you have already missed your shot.

    i can't fix your circumstance. if you had come to me before you were extremely desperate to get out of the friendzone i could have helped you. your best option is to come to terms with the fact that you will never get this girl if you keep thinking she is some angel from heaven. its pathetic that you could fall in love after spending so little time with her. she's not that great get over her.

  3. #3
    startinglife is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I'm in love and I can't move on please help

    I know it sounds crazy, but I have never felt this way about someone ever. I can get other girls, but I don't want to because of this girl...this has never happened to me before. Since she is the kinda girl that appreciates no bs honesty, I was thinking about telling her how I feel about her. Do you think I would have a better chance if I didn't spill my heart out and just gamed her while seeing other girls? I just want your opinion on the best move to getting her is....I want to try before moving on for good.

  4. #4
    meteora's Avatar
    meteora is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: I'm in love and I can't move on please help

    the point i'm getting at is that there is no best move. you've already exhausted your options and now your pinned to the ground by your feelings. your best bet is to go game other wemon, stay friends with her.
    revealing how you "feel" about her will be the easiest way to get closure though (she will just prove that you are too far in the friendzone to game her)
    she's not that important to you. in time you will realize that obsessing over this girl won't get you anywhere. you will meet better girls in the future.

    the only way to game her is to shelf her for a while, game other girls and then come back to her later when you aren't so "in love" with her. you won't be able to have her until you've gotten over your feelings for her. until you truly believe that she is no better than any other girl you have met then you won't get anywhere with her.

  5. #5
    hyp
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    Default Re: I'm in love and I can't move on please help

    you were thinking right when you said that we thought you had one itis but anyway I'd say the quickest route to getting over this chick would be to explicitly tell her how you feel (afc) and crash and burn, then you'll end up feeling sorry for yourself for about 1-2 weeks and then you'll no longer see her as the angel from heaven, atleast this way you won't be missing out on the chance to meet someone better than her because there will definitely wil be someone else - (yes this is the first time I've told someone to explicitly crash and burn)

    alternatively you could friendzone her but I don't see any point in doing it to build attraction at this stage because its a bit late, only peace of mind for you

  6. #6
    startinglife is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I'm in love and I can't move on please help

    Thanks guys. I have decided not to spill my heart out and tell her how I feel since my end goal is to be with her and telling her I'm crazy about her will, like you guys said, kill my chances with her in the future. I am going to try my best to see other girls and forget about her. I want to freeze her out for about 2 months, see other girls, and come back to her, but how do I freeze her out if she is my coworker and I am forced to see her 3 times a week? How should I treat her while I'm "freezing her out." Should I stop flirting with her all the time and ignore her? Should I stop texting her and giving her attention so that she fights for my attention? OR should I keep flirting and escalating and trying meet up?

  7. #7
    YOKiTran's Avatar
    YOKiTran is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I'm in love and I can't move on please help

    u can't love someone u haven't dated.

    wait for ur next chance and don't blow it.


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