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  1. #1
    justinwa is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Bitchy Girl I have a long history with. On/Off relationship

    Ok, so the idea of taming a girl might sound bad, but I like to think of girls as little cute chicks that are babies that you have to raise. Bear with this analogy please, but the idea is if things go well, then the relationship will grow and they will be a well behaved companion. However, if things derail then the cute little baby chick will turn into a fire breathing monster.

    What do I do with this girl?

    I have a love hate relationship with this particular girl. This is a clear example of a high school romance gone bad. The best way for me to describe this scenario in a nutshell is a Forrest Gump analogy, where I am Forrest and she is Jenny.

    This girl has baggage in the form of a crappy childhood and adolescence and our relationship is rocky. We talk occassionally. It's weird because I live in a different city now. It seems like the glue that has held us together is the fact I quit talking to her for a year, then come back all of a sudden-- it almost resets the relationship. We end of having a fling, then she goes cold again. We've rinsed-washed-and repeated this for about three times now. I even deleted her from facebook, twice now. We had the fling, even after I deleted her from FB and she knew about it. lol Oh, and the first time I deleted her she learned that I blocked her and got mad about that. She also found it interesting that every time she comes over she winds up naked in my bed, this was a positive comment though because of the way she said it.

    Just now she's gone cold again. What do I do? I really want to call her out on the fact that she blew me off on Christmas and bring to light the fact she is going down hill. She is overly religious and it appears she is using her religion as a crutch, but she's a total hippocrit. She is a church leader and almost like a mini preacher, but she drinks, and shows up to church with a hangover every now and then. Now she is in the process of dying her hair red and just got a tattoo of a biblical quote on her foot even though tattoos are a no-no for religious people. She also has a tendency to gravitate to the more down and out type people.

    I don't really know what to text her, because we've hit a wall in our conversation. The only thing I can think to do is to not talk to her a while again, and play in a different playground for a while until she decides to play nice. I just want to know if there are any strategies I can use to tame this little bitch. She used to be nice, but her personality is shifting to more of a mean-spirited, manipulative type person. Is there a way I can bring her back to the light side? lol Also, I'm trying to resist texting anything afc or mean, but it's really hard, because I'm wanting to call her out on her b.s.

    Thanks for reading, suggestions would be appreciated.

  2. #2
    beaker52 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Bitchy Girl I have a long history with. On/Off relationship

    Why do you want to call her out on her BS? It's not her BS you're going to be calling out ultimately, it'll be her ego and ego's can be pretty big deals.

    From the surface of it:
    + You have sex with her
    - You disagree with how she conducts her life
    - You fall out

    Looks like you want to change more than you actually enjoy about her. Why don't you look for someone who you can have sex with but you get on with and don't fall out with? Irrational attachment?

    That's the end of what I've got to say about it.

    It sounds much like a relationship I had with an ex (almost identical, except for religion). If you want to PM me to elaborate, feel free.

  3. #3
    justinwa is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Bitchy Girl I have a long history with. On/Off relationship

    Thank you for your reply Beaker52.

    I never thought of her b.s. being her ego that I'm dealing with. I guess my attatchment is pretty irrational, probably because I want her the way she used to be. Her old self probably will never exist again though.

    I was pretty much trying to save this relationship because history over the course of several years actually means something to me. Unfortunately, too many people operate on an as-is basis. It's such a shame.

  4. #4
    beaker52 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Bitchy Girl I have a long history with. On/Off relationship

    Quote Originally Posted by justinwa View Post
    Her old self probably will never exist again though.

    I was pretty much trying to save this relationship because history over the course of several years actually means something to me. Unfortunately, too many people operate on an as-is basis. It's such a shame.
    Unfortunately, you can't take a snapshot of someone and keep them that way forever. I'm sure you care very deeply for this girl, the way your lives have intertwined over the years. But dude, this is a PUA forum, we're like a fertility clinic for newborn relationships, not a relationship burial.

    PUA teaches you to be attractive to females, how to get under their skin, how to pick up women. If you come with a specific problem (more specific than "I have a slightly crazy girl who I've had a thing with that I'd like to be my girlfriend, how can I make it so?") with regards to attracting women, we can help, totally we can! Otherwise, just learn all the material, read the field reports, there are some cracking techniques for all sorts of interactions with women.

  5. #5
    justinwa is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Bitchy Girl I have a long history with. On/Off relationship

    Thanks man, I needed that reframe!


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