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  • 2 Post By inter1010
  • 1 Post By Suave Kino

Thread: Thought I was FZed but now I think I have a chance? Advice Needed

  1. #1
    Perez91 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Thought I was FZed but now I think I have a chance? Advice Needed

    Hi everyone, i'm new here so bear with this long post as I give some background info on my problem.

    Background:
    I started grad school about 4 months ago. During orientation I met this really cute girl and started flirting and talking with her. Less than two days later I invited her over to my place for dinner and she came. I was afraid to take things too fast so I would keep flirty touches to a minimum. When classes began we realized that we were in the same classes and sat next to each other in 4 out of the 5 classes. After that we became "study partners" and would go on "friend" dates every week. I even asked her out after 3 weeks and she originally said yes. But on the day of the "date" she texted me: "Why [are we going to] the fancy restaurant. It's not like its a date?" To which I repled: "No, its only two friends having dinner." I was hopeless and giving up, everyone told me I had been FZed very badly. On another of these "dates" I asked her what she would do if I asked her out, and she said that we were "just friends" and that she didn't want to ruin the friendship. I began just seeing her as a friend and we worked together on school work etc. She also met a guy from another state and hooked up with him on their first date. However, she has only seen him twice and complains to me that he never texts her anything romantic, only ordinary stuff.

    In December, I invited her over to my place to celebrate the end of exams. We both got really drunk. I began playing with her hair, laying on her, putting my arm around her, and we ended up dancing. After dancing we fell on the floor (in my place) and I pecked her. She didn't say anything. Then I picked her up from the floor and took her to the couch where we cuddled and then messed around for like an hour. (Afraid to do anything else, because I didn't know if she was allowing me to do this because we were both drunk). After awhile I asked her to stay over and she did. We slept in the same bed but nothing happened. (I was super scared to try anything)

    In the morning, everything was normal. I made her breakfast and we laid on the couch together. She asked me if I would marry her if we both didn't find anyone by 27, and I said no because that would me I would be a "back-up" to which she responded that she didn't see it like that. I then just shook my head. Then we began talking about the guy she likes and the conversation turned sexual. I asked her about her favorite sex positions, if she plays with herself etc. to which I got honest answers. As we were talking, I started kissing her neck and tried to go in for a kiss, which was when she asked me "what are you doing?" This got me scared again, and I just stopped and then took her home.

    I didn't see her for 10 days during our break but we texted everyday. She constantly tells me she "loves me" and that she "misses me." At first I use to say the same things back but now I have tried not to respond with stuff like "i love you too etc."

    Issue (Currently):

    Four days ago, she went out to drink with her female friends and invited me to come meet them there. At the bar she got hit on by an older man and I got jealous and texted her "have fun with him in bed" to which she just said "No! lol". When her friends told her to leave I told her that I would drive her home and to stay awhile with me so she agreed. However, my time was cut short by an idiot from my school that started hitting on her as well. He wouldn't get off her so I threatened to leave her at the bar and got pissed. I told the guy that he would have to take her home. She then came out with me and I basically told her that she could have stayed with him and slept with him if she wanted, that I didn't care.

    When we got to her house, I did what I had not wanted to do: I told her that I wanted to end our friendship because I had strong romantic feelings for her. She cried and told me that she loved me even if I had romantic feelings for her and that she didn't want to lose me. Just when I was going to leave, my car's battery died and she invited me to stay over.

    When we got in her bed, I grabbed her and kissed her normally to which she said "I can't even slap you because I love you so much." I then kissed her again and when she opened her mouth thrust my tongue in. She then called me "wild" and we cuddled until we fell asleep. In the morning when she wanted to get up I threw my hand in her shirt again and played with her nip for a few minutes. Then I got up and left the house. We later went to the mall together and had dinner. Everything has been pretty normal after that. Except that two days ago when I didn't respond to one of her text she asked me "if I was mad at her" to which I responded "why would I be?" Then yesterday she didn't text me all day and I didn't text her until 1030p. She told me she missed working with me and that we loved each other and thats why we miss each other so much.

    Today I haven't heard from her. I don't know what to do. I would like to f- close with her but since she seems so "submissive" and doesn't really do anything when I am under her shirt or kissing her I don't know what that means. My friends tell me I am definitely not FZed if she allows me to do that stuff to her and then acts all normal like if nothing has happened. Mind you she still is talking to this other guy and puts statuses of him on twitter all the time. However, he is 4 hours away, so I have been ignoring him and just focusing on me getting her.

    How do I proceed? Do I ask her to come to my apartment for dinner and then start flirting/touching and go in for a kiss and push it from there? Do I explicitly ask her to be more than friends or what is going on between us?

    From what I've said do you think she likes me/is there any possibility of more than friends? (the i love you stuff seems to just be a friendly I love you)

    Thank you all!

  2. #2
    omgimonfrie is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Thought I was FZed but now I think I have a chance? Advice Needed

    If she lets you kiss her at will, then there is sexual tension for sure. You could just escalate her to the point she is so horny she can't stop you, however after the sex she could get confused/scared and go even harder for this other guy since she still thinks of you as a friend..so that could backfire.

    You could ask her what her plans are with this other dude, and point out that she is pursuing something with a guy 4 hours away and completely ignoring what she has with you right in her home town. If you bring up that conversation if could just as easily FZ you even harder by being like her "gay friend." (only using that term for the stereotype)

    Or it could get her thinking. If she lets you play with her fun parts she like you in a sexual manner. Probably because she feels so comfortable with you. I'd say just keep on trying, but don't hang with her and her friends hardly ever. It will keep you FZ'd.

    Prehaps try talking to another female and see how she reacts? That could also back fire though

  3. #3
    inter1010 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Thought I was FZed but now I think I have a chance? Advice Needed

    ^^^^ PLEASE DO NOT LISTEN TO A WORD THE ABOVE POSTER SAID!!!

    Dude, I suggest you read up ALOT on these forums and others!!! YOu fucked up big time by

    1). Talking bad about the other guy who's 4 hours away. That is a big NO NO!!! read up on here.

    2). You shouldn't of told her your feelings for her! thats a women's job!

    3). YOU don't get mad when guys HIT on her. YOu should encourage them! again, please read up on here to find out why. I don't want to type it up as it will take to long.


    OK, now, CAN I PLease SLAP you in the face!!!!..... WHy are you asking us "HOw should I make my next move"????? WHat the hell dude???? ..... This girl is sleeping in your bed, showing you mad attention, and basically giving you the opportunity to FUCK the SHIT out if her every tie you hang out. YOur next move is hanging out with her, then going to your or hers, and then Escalating to Sex(read vin de carlos' sexual escalation thing on here, it will help you out). NO more just touching her nipples, your not 18 anymore. Start with that then get down to business..... Dude, Ive been scared and used to not GO FOR IT, cause I thought I would ruin it, or she wasn't into it etc.... SHe is probably more into it than you.

    THe good news I think is that you seemed like you were deep in the friend zone, but I get the feeling from your writing that this girl has always been attracted to you. And she still is/might be. SHe now knows you LIKE her a lot, so My only advice is to escalate with her and see what happens. You'll have your answer there. GO FOR IT, and if she denies you, I think( and someone please chime in if you disagree) you should be DIRECT and tell her your gonna take her as your lover. The games are over my friend, Its go time.

    Also, don't look for reassurance from an online PUA forum telling you that "she likes you" before you can make a move!. You have to get to a point in pickup where you DONT CARE if she likes you or not before you make a move, cause its what YOU want out of it. BE selfish. haha.

  4. #4
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    Suave Kino is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Thought I was FZed but now I think I have a chance? Advice Needed

    This is for you own good.

    First of all, please for goodness sakes stop acting like bia.. Even if this girl likes you and somehow you manage to sleep with her this beta act is gonna get tired really fast.

    Secondly, if she likes you and you don't man up and do what she wants a man to do to her, she will lose interest. She hooked up with a some guy on the first date and you are scared to try? Come, on man.

    Finally, she isn't gonna beg you to close the deal. If she doesn't stop you. Keep going.


    If you get blown out and stuffed clearly FZ...take it like a man and move on.

    Kino's Tips to Beat LMR.

  5. #5
    jtorres2_1 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Thought I was FZed but now I think I have a chance? Advice Needed

    Pretty much everything has been said, let me leave you with the last bit of advice.

    Almost everything you've done to this point was wrong. Take everything you've done: not wanting to touch her too much, being afraid, talking about the other guys, letting time slip by, telling her you are the best of friends [HUGE NO NO], acting like one of the girls and getting angry with the other guys hitting at her. Take all that stuff and do pretty much the exact opposite, THAT is now your new credo.

    To be honest, you don't have time to learn all the PUA ins and outs, you pretty much need to do exactly what these guys have told you and do it asap. You're pretty much at the point of no return, i can't really think of anywhere else that this could go to.

    You remind me ALOT of myself and some long forgotten girl some years back, it was very much like your situation. It did not end well at all.

  6. #6
    Perez91 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Thought I was FZed but now I think I have a chance? Advice Needed

    I really appreciate all your responses and the direct truthfulness of them. I did dig a hole for myself, so I will try this advice next time I see her. If it doesn't work out, then I will apply the stuff i've been reading on here. Very helpful!

  7. #7
    beaker52 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Thought I was FZed but now I think I have a chance? Advice Needed

    You are the prize. Never forget that.

  8. #8
    Fuser is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Thought I was FZed but now I think I have a chance? Advice Needed

    Honestly, Kino said it all. The only reason you are in this situation is because of your BETA attitude. Besides all the mistakes and afc tantrums you've given this girl she still lets you fondle her. You need to escalate and go for the f-close. That's what she wants dude, a MAN. Take Kinos advice and go for it.


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