I got LJBF'ed a while ago. Let me explain:
I met this girl when going out. We danced and laughed together the whole time. She was all over me. I got her phone number. She came over. We cooked dinner together and then watched a movie on the couch. I grabbed her hand and started kissing her. When things got heavier, she froze up, and left my appartment before I was able to say something.
Remark: I did not build any report or any emotional connection with her.
We kept on dating afterwards. Once every two weeks about a month or two.It was always an action date: dancing salsa, doing fun stuff, ... Everytime we were holding hands. Conversation: lighthearted banter. We never spoke about personal topics like something about fantasies, sexuality, dreams, future plans... you know, the usual "getting to know each other"-sh1t. Eventually on one of the dates, we ended up kissing again. The date after she told me right of the bat, she did not feel comfortable kissing me, because she feels I don't know her and she doesn't know me and that she's scared I'll leave her... and that she would want to stay friends.
Remark: I like to stress that up until now we only had fun together, I never talked to her about personal stuff, never tried to build report or an emotional connection.
At first I was dissapointed in her (which scared her even more)... but eventually I said I thought she was really sexy and fun to be around with, and I just wanted to show it to her by escalating sexually. I also said there was nothing more than attraction going on and that I did not yet feel an emotional connection, but that I would really get to know her as a person.
She replied it will never become sexual anymore because she really really disliked it I was pushing for sex without trying to get to know her and if I was ok with that.
I said I was ok with that.
I thought I would never hear from her again. But twoo weeks later she asked me to go to a a party together by mail. In the mail she explained she waited a while to make sure we were able to process the situation alone and that she wanted to meet me again to see what's going on between us and if we are able to both feel comfortable when we're hanging out together. During the party she followed me around everywhere, and left her group of friends to sit next to me and to dance with me the whole time.
I was wondering if my analysis is correct. She still is attracted to me although she says otherwise, but wants to be "friends" so she can feel comfortable again around me so we can get to know each other? She wants to feel she has some value and really means something to me as she probably thinks I only regard her as someone I just want to have sex with?
Am I correct? Can I still turn this thing around? I know I should keep going out meet other interesting people, but specifically regarding this girl how should I take it from here? I want to try to get her to my place again to build that report and connection while a soft music plays and candles are burning in the background (i should have done this the first - and only - time she came over), but I feel if my timing's not right I will scare her off again by just inviting her.