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Thread: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

  1. #1
    sparky77's Avatar
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    Default Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    Hey PUA's,

    Need some pro advice...
    I've been having some SERIOUS trouble getting out of the friend zone with this one girl. Friends for about a year, things kind of picked up unexpectedly for both of us about 3 months ago. She told me shes been crushing on me for 8 months or so, we went on a couple dates. Realized it would be a serious relationship thing. I want in, it doesn't look like she wants to though.

    Girl is apparently crazy about me, but she "has things to sort out" according to her and her friends. I don't think I'm chasing too hard? She knows exactly how I feel though (big mistake i think...).

    NOW...valentines day is coming up...guys I need advice getting out of this zone. It's absolutely brutal.

    Things I know:
    -she has no other guy interest, or unresolved guy issues
    -she had seriously bad relationships before
    -everytime we get drunk together its like we're a couple (sometimes fooling around sometimes not)
    -she invites me out all the time, so i know shes not running
    -i don't have issue picking up girls normally, fairly confident

    Suggestions??

  2. #2
    Swagman's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    Right now, I can see a big problem in that you are over-calculating all of this right now. You are depending on the outcome, thus you are trying to plan out right now. This causes you to be unnatural, and it ultimately destroys your game. If you don't hook up with her, who cares. If you do, then whoopdie-freaking-do. I don't mean literally that I don't care that you get into a relationship, but this is the mindset you should maintain when you approach this situation.

    As for a Valentine's Day gift, give her something simple and cheap, but is well thought out. If you know her as well as I think you do, this should be no problem for you.

    Good luck, and may the force be with you.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  3. #3
    Casio is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    Quote Originally Posted by sparky77 View Post
    Hey PUA's,

    Need some pro advice...
    I've been having some SERIOUS trouble getting out of the friend zone with this one girl. Friends for about a year, things kind of picked up unexpectedly for both of us about 3 months ago. She told me shes been crushing on me for 8 months or so, we went on a couple dates. Realized it would be a serious relationship thing. I want in, it doesn't look like she wants to though.

    Girl is apparently crazy about me, but she "has things to sort out" according to her and her friends. I don't think I'm chasing too hard? She knows exactly how I feel though (big mistake i think...).

    NOW...valentines day is coming up...guys I need advice getting out of this zone. It's absolutely brutal.

    Things I know:
    -she has no other guy interest, or unresolved guy issues
    -she had seriously bad relationships before
    -everytime we get drunk together its like we're a couple (sometimes fooling around sometimes not)
    -she invites me out all the time, so i know shes not running
    -i don't have issue picking up girls normally, fairly confident

    Suggestions??
    Looks like you are not in the Friend Zone. But you want to be her boyfriend and she doesn't want to. All this excuses that she is telling you is just that: excuses. The girl likes you but she doesn't want no relationship with you right now. What you should do is give her what she wants: a friends with benefit relationship. Go flirty with her, ask her questions that expose that she likes you, lots of kino. Maybe after the friends with benefit relationship you might be her boyfriend, who knows. For Saint Valentines i got nothing but to agree with the Swagman's advice. Take care pal.

  4. #4
    sparky77's Avatar
    sparky77 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    UPDATE

    sorry for the late reply, wanted to see how things worked before I gave an update. Gave her a gift, she was being pretty distant lately though. I completely agree with you Swag, my game was shot with being all needy. I haven't been texting her or anything for the last week or so, going to run this game and back off until things pick up again, hopefully. I'm disconnecting and trying to go out and have fun in the meantime. This IS the long term goal, but I doubt itll go anywhere soon. So in the meantime, got to fix my strategy...

    Thanks for the advice guys

  5. #5
    Casio is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    nice to hear from you again. Could you explain us why she has been distant. How has her body language been towards your persona. What was the gift you give her for St Valentines. How did she reacted when you gave her the gift. I still think that if you get un attached from this woman but let her know that is ok, that you don't want a long term relationship and try the advice that we gave you she will be back to you. If she talked to you straight up that she likes you that means she does. But she surely doesn't want nothing long term with you. Hope this helps bro.

  6. #6
    sparky77's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    She's been distant in the sense that we normally talk/text everyday. That went down completely, down to me initiating more than anything. She might think I'm ignoring her already, she called me out on it before, I know it won't go unnoticed. Body language I guess its been more difficult to tell since we haven't hung out this past week (which is when she was being distant), so I can't say yet. The gift was something simple, one single long stem rose with this poem she really likes (i know this was probably a bad move now). She wasn't home, and I wasn't keen on waiting so I left it on her doorstep as anonymous (she knew it was me right away). The way she reacted...hmm..I guess well? Said that it was beautiful and thank you and all that. But I'm sure it might have scared her off a bit. We talked about the whole thing about dating casually before, and it's pretty obvious to the both of us that we'd get attached quick. That won't work. I think you're right Casio that she doesn't want the longterm thing.
    So, like I said. Going to stand back and run a little bit of defense. If I have any success stories I'll keep you guys posted

  7. #7
    Casio is offline PUA in Training
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    Wink Re: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    She's been distant in the sense that we normally talk/text everyday.
    Most probably she needs some space. I always think that it's not good if you talk with the person all the time. I prefer talking to the person once a week. That way the person has space to think.


    That went down completely, down to me initiating more than anything. She might think I'm ignoring her already, she called me out on it before, I know it won't go unnoticed.
    Of course, because when you ignore her you are not on top of her all the time. She has space to think so when she already has had her space, she's ready for you again.


    The gift was something simple, one single long stem rose with this poem she really likes (i know this was probably a bad move now).
    Good gift. But that keeps making her think that you want her to be your girlfriend. Roses and poems are very romantic stuff, it's not stuff that you dedicate to somebody that doesn't want a "long term" with you. Next time give her a medium size teddy bear, some soap, a bath towel and face lotion.


    So, like I said. Going to stand back and run a little bit of defense.
    What i would do is call her out. Ask her why she has been distant with me. Then, you unattach yourself. Try to let her know by my way of texting, and by talking indirectly that I am very happy being single and that I don't want any girlfriend. I would stop being romantic, I will start being more flirty, backing off by calling her or texting her once a week. I would also stop talking about romantic stuff. I would start talking about normal stuff. Of course, I won't recommend that you talk to her about your problems or don't listen too much to her problems to avoid ending in the "friend zone". Yeah, you know, "the friend", the guy that is always there listening to her problems but never getting kissed or getting laid . I am always glad to help you. Keep us updated.

  8. #8
    trackster1 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    Quote Originally Posted by Casio View Post
    Most probably she needs some space. I always think that it's not good if you talk with the person all the time. I prefer talking to the person once a week. That way the person has space to think.




    Of course, because when you ignore her you are not on top of her all the time. She has space to think so when she already has had her space, she's ready for you again.




    Good gift. But that keeps making her think that you want her to be your girlfriend. Roses and poems are very romantic stuff, it's not stuff that you dedicate to somebody that doesn't want a "long term" with you. Next time give her a medium size teddy bear, some soap, a bath towel and face lotion.




    What i would do is call her out. Ask her why she has been distant with me. Then, you unattach yourself. Try to let her know by my way of texting, and by talking indirectly that I am very happy being single and that I don't want any girlfriend. I would stop being romantic, I will start being more flirty, backing off by calling her or texting her once a week. I would also stop talking about romantic stuff. I would start talking about normal stuff. Of course, I won't recommend that you talk to her about your problems or don't listen too much to her problems to avoid ending in the "friend zone". Yeah, you know, "the friend", the guy that is always there listening to her problems but never getting kissed or getting laid . I am always glad to help you. Keep us updated.



    thanks i also gotta stop listening to problems

  9. #9
    Casio is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    You are welcome my friend Trackster. If you need any advice just let me know. I'll be more than glad to help you.

  10. #10
    trackster1 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Getting out of the friendzone- Perfect chick

    Quote Originally Posted by Casio View Post
    You are welcome my friend Trackster. If you need any advice just let me know. I'll be more than glad to help you.
    def. i created a post at Ask an Expert> Should i send her arrangement.
    i cant post urls yet lol

    thanks, i need all the help i can get lol


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