I've been trying to focus on changing my inner beliefs, let go of the regrets I've made, see things in a new light. I stand taller, I don't look at the ground, I try to be more polite to the people I meet and do what I can to make people smile. It's a concious effort, the old habits are hard to shake. I haven't even begun.
I don't hit the gym, I haven't upgraded my life, I've simply acted like I'm better than I was before. I've tried to convince myself that I'm willing and able to have what I want in this life and the more I focus on the positive, the more positive that comes to me. To put a label on this mind set would be to refer to the law of attraction. What you think about, comes about.
I KNOW there is a beuatiful girl out there for me, regardless of the ones who have already been. I KNOW there are opportunities out there to make good money, buy a nice house and live the lifestyle I want. I KNOW that dwelling on the negative will push these things away from me and keep me stuck in one place.
I try to look forward to what I want. I can not go where I've been. This road they call 'life' is one way. You can't turn around and go back. Surely enough though, there WILL be another bus to jump on. There WILL be another opportunity if I keep looking ahead.
It's not going to be easy, I've made some bad memories. I've hurt myself and other people, but eventually I'll be forgiven. I try to keep a positive mindset. I know that's the most powerful tool I can have. "He who conquers himself is mighty"
Last night, things didn't go to plan.
My friends who I contacted had work today, or they had no money, some of them didn't even get back to me. I haven't been keeping social relationships sweet. So I had to head out and hope I bumped in to someone I knew. I headed out, and I bumped in to someone I knew. It had to happen that way.
90% of the night was good fun, although there was 10% that wasn't good. I wasn't in the best place I could be and there was a girl in a couple of places that knew something of my history and treated me like I was a terrible person. What could I do, other than apologise for my past behaviour and try to look forward? Nothing. I can not change what's been, it's a one way road.
This mindset, I had to keep feeling strong. Feeling good makes people treat you in a positive way.. They can't help but do that. shine from within and people will be attracted.
When you look good, you feel good and when you feel good, you do good. It's a vicious cycle when you aren't part of it. You have to jump back on it, anyway you can. You have to think positive.
It's hard for me to go in to too much detail about last night, so I'll try to keep it short. There were friends, alcohol, there was a girl, there was an after party. It was fun, but I made mistakes. I dwelled on the bad side of things.. I let it get the better of me. I felt down and went home early. I made a mistake, but tonight is another opportunity.. Tomorrow is another day. Eventually there will be another bus on this road, and when it comes I just need to act right when I get on it and I can stay on it until I get where I want to go.
Think positive and good things will come. You just have to keep your eyes open, it's there. Waiting.. You'll find it.