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  1. #1
    drdunk is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Number Closing But Message Fail

    Hey there guys ive been gaming girls for a while now, and it seems like ive been running to a few similar patterns

    Ill get a girls number no problem, but then the texting is forever and often times i just get sick of it,and say this is not working out, how can i set up a date!

    When i actually do have the first date i guess i get too open and touchy feely! And it goes kinda down from there! Its like i cant be myself, how can i control it?

  2. #2
    scguitar is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Number Closing But Message Fail

    Plan the date as you get her number. Ask what day she's free and stuff like that. Alternatively, you could use the text as a transition to a phone call.

    On the date, there is nothing wrong with a little bit of touchy feely. You want to escalate touching to get some sexual tension. Obviously, there is such a thing as over doing it, and I'm not sure if you are or not just based on your one post. Sounds like you kinda go into "try hard" mode on the date and are probably nervous on the date. Am I wrong?

    Try having more relaxed body posture. If your body is more relaxed, your mind will be too. Also, maybe start picking up meditation so you can learn to quite your mind and have control over your thoughts and actions

  3. #3
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Number Closing But Message Fail

    It sounds like you're probably coming across as being too eager.

    A girl LOVES a challenge... so if you're making things too easy for her, she's gonna lose interest.

    Check out my thread on how to make her chase YOU.


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  4. #4
    costarica's Avatar
    costarica is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Number Closing But Message Fail

    Your issue is your frame and escalation rate:

    Here is why:

    1. "Ill get a girls number no problem" << If you can do this, no problem, then you've overcome approach anxiety and partial comfort/attraction. Few people realize this is actually the hardest part of the game. Of course LMR is hard, but very few people ever become good at this because they are blown out during the initial approach.

    So... you ARE capable.

    2. "texting is forever" << This is because you are not constantly escalating fast enough. There are several texting guides. http://www.puaforums.com/how-text-gi...ame-rules.html is one. But add to this CONSTANT movement towards emotional and sexual escalation.

    3. "i just get sick of it" << because you are writing boring texts and of course she is reading those boring texts and both of you are getting borded. If she started talking to you about how she robbed a bank naked but wearing a ninja mask and holding her favorite vibrator, I bet you'd be getting interested very quickly...

    4. "i get too open and touchy feely" << this is actaully not bad at all. Two steps forward, 1-step back, repeat. Or some like to say, kino-resistance-stop-restart-repeat. However you say it, there isn't a such thing as "too fast." There is a such thing as "too agressive" however, and don't mistake the two. Some girls will let you escalate to sex in 2-3 hours, and some take 20. It's the level of agression that you have and the level of response that she has. Agression may be a bad word here, so instead use "persistance."

    5. "Its like i cant be myself" - Then stop what you are doing, and be yourself. If she doesn't like it, tell her she's gay and you are sending her home.

    Remember. YOU are the man, so YOU control yourself, your frame, your persistance, and your goals. Bring her into your world and just constantly escalate.
    - CR

  5. #5
    Suave Kino's Avatar
    Suave Kino is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Number Closing But Message Fail

    Quote Originally Posted by drdunk View Post
    Hey there guys ive been gaming girls for a while now, and it seems like ive been running to a few similar patterns

    Ill get a girls number no problem, but then the texting is forever and often times i just get sick of it,and say this is not working out, how can i set up a date!

    When i actually do have the first date i guess i get too open and touchy feely! And it goes kinda down from there! Its like i cant be myself, how can i control it?
    The problem is you aren't building enough initial attraction.

    Kino's "BOMBSHELL" YOU MUST READ!!!

  6. #6
    FriendzoneDominator's Avatar
    FriendzoneDominator is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Number Closing But Message Fail

    If the problem is that you're being nervous before the date (or anything else) I'm trying out a trick that seems to work pretty well:

    When you're taking a shower and are almost done, turn the water to as cold as possible and get as shocked as you can stand! (And then you can put some warm water on again.)

    Compared to that shock, the social thing you're nervous about suddenly seems like a walk in the park.

    As a bonus: Your survival-rate after falling in cold water will greatly increase.


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