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  • 1 Post By costarica

Thread: in big need of a life changer, help ( long post )

  1. #1
    Erixzon is offline PUA in Training
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    Default in big need of a life changer, help ( long post )

    Hello, this might take a time reading so go ahead and grab your popcorns! anyway. im gonna start by introdouce myself,
    name is Martin, i live in sweden. ive heard the game on ebook ive seen mystery show and ive been on this forum for almost a year now. im a virgin, and its tbh kinda frustrating.
    in school im not the nerd guy but im not the alpha male that ppl love to be around. but im in the " cool " group and im playing my part. i go to parties and i can talk to girls with kinda ease. still my gaming levels is really low but i could still say exactly what to do but it just feels wrong when im actually gonna try it on a girl. im 185 cm tall so im not this short guy, but im 68kgs kinda thin for my age. my biggest issue "threat" is actually my kinda best friend. he is 190 cm tall big guy looks like 20 years old + and he is not every girls desire but as soon as he talks to a girl they love him already, literally any girl. and as soon as i think that girl is so hot imma try with her, i feel threatend by my friend cause it feels like girls just go right into looks and it doesnt matter what i say cause he is better looking more muscles etc etc. and he is gonna kinda steal my girl.
    so its been a while since i actually been on this forum cause month ago i was like fark this its never gonna happen anyway lets just wait til the moment comes to me. but today i realized u cant wait for the perfect moments u have to create them. im not looking for a life long relationship with some girl ive been dreaming about. actually my only goal is to see that i, me, myself actually can be someones " crush " that actually a good looking nice girl likes me and doesnt ditch me for my looks.
    when i was younger i was the clown of the class. i made ppl laugh and i did stupid things. and i think ppl see me as who i was even this day. thats why im not the most populare guy. so who i am at the moment.
    i ride motocross and i like that style,
    i really like rock music. and my dream is the rockstar life. you know getting girls lean style just chilling.
    when im at parties im thinking to myself dont be that over energy guy thats up dancing 24/7 trying to get attention.
    last party i actually sat down took alot of space leaned back and showed me big. i didnt drink myself drunk for the whole night. and it actually felt kinda good. i got some eye contact with some girls dancing on the floor. i took that kinda positive but it still feels like they dont want me when a better looking guy is in the house.
    my clothing style is kinda street style, snapback cap with bigger shirts and ripped jeans. not swag style, but ive gotten comments like do u ride motocross, u must be good at skiing etc etc. i take that positive only thing i believe girls think that style is kinda boyish and every girl wants a man! i actuallly just bought a leather jacket that i look kinda good in but i always wear a cap, i just cant figure out how to do my hair i want a more peacocky style with abit rock style but still keep it normal so i dont get a wtf is this kinda look. i think you get it. so as the title says i need a god damn life changer right now! shape my life up at this point.
    - how to alpha male " out my more good looking friend "
    - confidence
    - style
    - gaming, especially at parties like this
    - getting attention
    - get girls to chase me ( actually never had a interested girl text me first...)
    - inner game
    - demonstrate higher value
    - be a more interesting person in general
    yes as you see its many things i wanna change i didnt say its was gonna be easy, but as soon as i get a good response as you get from " ask a expert " thread im closer each day, im not aiming for perfect, as i said my goal is improvement and i wanna see results!

    : here is an little extra story to come with if you wanna read it. so i wrote to this girl that's in my school same age, i see hear mabye once a week in the building we are in. but iv'e never talked to her in real life. i dont even think we got eyecontact. but i wrote to her on facebook. and we had a chit chat about stuff. thing with this girl i cant really see anything that is wrong, nice smile good lips pretty face good body. then i just realized thisg girl got big hands!, anyhow it doesnt feel like she is really intresed but she actually replies to each one of my messages. i made her laugh couple of times but really no smileys. i made a little joke about her hand and bla bla it escalated to i called her officer big-hand alice. and she was hahahaha your sick! and i replied well your laughing at it so i guess its good . she laughed couple of more times and i felt ive got this i just need more material etc etc
    but she feels abit bitchy and that im not even in her mind. and i'd really like to se progress with this girl if you could give me some advices on this. that was all from me, im gonna head to bed. and i hope for some replies when i wake up! thanks for everything!
    Last edited by KristiBell; 05-15-2013 at 05:40 AM.

  2. #2
    costarica's Avatar
    costarica is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: in big need of a life changer, help ( long post )

    .

    So my official advice is: stay in school, study hard and have fun while you still can't get in that much trouble.
    Last edited by KristiBell; 05-15-2013 at 05:40 AM.
    - CR

  3. #3
    EMSaenz's Avatar
    EMSaenz is offline PUA With Mad Respect
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    Default Re: in big need of a life changer, help ( long post )

    1) If your BF is Alpha and blocking you or sabotaging your Game (even if he's not & it's just in your mind), LOSE him. Don't take him along if you're going out sarging!

    2) You have confidence problems. Don't sweat it, everyone does. It's a survival response that actually causes us to think on how to overcome our fears. It is only an obstacle if you don't use it to reflect & resolve. In your case there is a) physical appearance (looks & dress) & b) virginity.

    Looks and dress mean nothing if you don't have the demeanor to back it up! With the right attitude, a man can make anything look good on him! The most important things to remember are to be clean, smell good and act comfortable w/yourself.

    Virginity vs losing it shouldn't be a huge concern at your age. Keep in mind that all ( hear me? ALL!!! ) sexual interactions w/women will carry some EMOTIONAL responsibility! Someone may get attached, someone may get hurt. Just enjoy being young, dating, flirting, kissing w/o worrying that you're still a virgin. You'll be a happier adult if you can learn to enjoy your youth!

    3) Don't be too judgmental! Enjoy every opportunity to interact w/women regardless of their looks. Stop looking for faults and start looking for qualities. It's okay to NEG when you have to, but it can backfire if you don't need to.

    As SOON as you get a chance, ASK Officer Big-Hand Alice out on a date!
    Last edited by EMSaenz; 03-10-2013 at 10:37 PM. Reason: typo
    Carpe diem!

  4. #4
    CrimsonElite is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: in big need of a life changer, help ( long post )

    First of all, despite the media brainwashing, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a virgin. You really shouldn't even lose it until you're about 18 because sex at at a young age can mess you up. I know how it feels to be a horny kid. I still am a horny kid lol. What I can tell you is when you're around women don't be yourself. Why? Because right now yourself sucks. You're moping, lack confidence, and a simp (someone who lets girls run over them). Stop simping, and start pimping. I don't mean you should start a prostitution ring because that would be unethical and illegal lol. What I want you to do is go into the mirror and tell yourself how awesome you are. Don't say anything negative about yourself for one day. Feel good about yourself. Even the after doing the simplest of tasks compliment yourself. I don't care if you're 5"1 and 400 lbs or 7 feet and 100 lbs. Tell yourself you look sexy and that the only persons opinion that matters is yours. Don't be a d bag, because then no one will hang out with you. Loving yourself is essential though. Body language is very important. Make sure you look into her eyes but not too much. Be comfortable in situations and don't script everything. Go with the flow. Treat every women (even the hottest ones) like a normal person. You don't need her, she needs you. I hope you found some useful tips in here buddy. And please, you are only 16 years old. I'm not trying to force my opinion on you but someone who has slept with more women than he can count on both hands isn't cool. Screwing random girls every night and waking up with a hangover is not a healthy lifestyle. There's nothing wrong with some pimping here and there, but don't let it define who you are. Don't let women walk over you, but don't treat her like crap either. Good luck man, I wish you all the best!
    Last edited by KristiBell; 05-15-2013 at 05:41 AM.

  5. #5
    dave_xxx's Avatar
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    Default Re: in big need of a life changer, help ( long post )

    Consider yourself fortunate that you are young. At this age you have only a few bad habits and those can be changed easily when you start to make self improvements at a younger age.

    We feel the most confident and secure when we look our best. Again you can make positive changes in your appearance very easily. It's easier to add muscle when your are in your late teens and your 20's.

    I suggest that you go to the gym and start lifting weights. Get as much knowledge about proper lifting techniques and exercises to gain muscle and lose fat.

    Also read about proper nutrition to feed your body protein, carbs and healthy fats. You have to know what to eat in order to have that better body you want , like the friend of yours who you mention in your post.

    Also focus on your education academically and socially. Set goals for where you want to be 2 years, 4 years, 6 years and 10 years down the road. Write them down and review them every morning when you brush your teeth. It will keep you focused on your goals. Yes these goals can include how many girls you plan to talk to each day and fark each month / year.

    Educate yourself about being a PUA. Read everything that is on this site. Try it out in the field. See what works for YOU and keep adding to that. Start with openers as the foundation of your PUA skills and keep adding 1 other PUA skill every 2 weeks.

    The only limit we have on what we can be is the one we impose on ourselves.

    I know you can do really well. Now, it's up to you to follow through. Keep us posted on your progress!

    [ If you use spaces between paragraphs it makes it easier to read long posts. Do that next time. Thanks]
    Last edited by KristiBell; 05-15-2013 at 05:41 AM.


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