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Thread: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

  1. #1
    btheman22 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    After going on a first date with a girl and kissing her, I invited her for dinner at my place for the second date, and she preferred to go out to a restaurant. I accused her of being high maintenance and she got offended and wanted to just be friends. I texted her and left a message about hanging out as friends - no response. I saw her a month later and she approached me, asking me how I'm doing. When I asked her why she never responded, she said she changed her number and I told her to call me - she did not. I JUST texted her old number and she responded, asking me how I'm doing. What is going on here?

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    Default Re: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    Cut that one loose...
    I smell crazy with this girl. (Or at least lots of future drama!)


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    I think you should have assessed the situation a little bit better; just because she doesn't want to come over to your house for a second date doesn't mean that shes high maintenance.

    I don't think she's crazy, I just think she isn't crazy about you. Calling a woman high maintenance is fundamentally undermining who she is as a person. There is a difference between what "puas" call a neg, and an attack on someones character.

    You should have bailed after she said she wanted to be friends. After that mental connection has been established between you and a nonsexual partner you've got an uphill battle that really isn't worth the time unless you want tom marry this woman.

  4. #4
    btheman22 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    Ok...after I left the voice mail I saw her a month later at Subway. She was on the way out as I was on the way in. I said a VERY quick hi to her, she stayed in the restaurant, fumbled with her phone for a good 10 sec, then when I looked over she walked over to me and tried to start a conversation. I gave her my number and told her to call me to hang out as friends...she never did. But she is responding to my text. So she wants to be friends enough to approach me, but not enough to give me a call?

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    There are a lot of factors in this equation that we on the internet don't understand without observing everything first hand... but lets just take a look at one:

    You called a month back and left her a voice mail when she didn't pick up(strike one), you bump into her a month later and give her a quick "hi"(strike 2) and then when she tried to start a conversation, you gave her your phone number and told her you wanted to hang out as friends(strike 3)... and then you wonder why she never called.

    The situation could have been handled a little better, and you were obviously still mad about being blown off, which is understandable. Yet she stopped to "play with her phone" before trying to start a conversation. You had the ball in your court. She was initiating a communication channel and you stopped it.
    Rule Number 1: You are not a PUA.

  6. #6
    btheman22 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    Icarus, your reply is very confusing. Here's why:

    Why is it bad that I gave her a quick h as I walked in? What would you have done instead?

    When I asked her why she never called me back, she lied and said her phone number changed. Why would a girl walk up to me if she didn't want to talk to me?

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    Quote Originally Posted by btheman22 View Post
    Icarus, your reply is very confusing. Here's why:

    Why is it bad that I gave her a quick h as I walked in? What would you have done instead?

    When I asked her why she never called me back, she lied and said her phone number changed. Why would a girl walk up to me if she didn't want to talk to me?
    You didn't bump into her going down the street on your way somewhere, you bumped into her walking into a subway... a basic understanding of proxemics and territoriality would indicate that you went there to get a sandwich. A quick "hi" would normally indicate that you are heading somewhere and have no time to chat; instead you went and stood awkwardly in line after essentially blowing her off. You also hadn't seen her in a month... A quick "hi" would normally indicate a pretty consistent relationship(even on a strictly platonic level)

    Based upon your last interaction, you need to take the rebuilding a little slow; I would have acted excited to see her; asked how she's been, told her it's been too long, and then said we should do something soon. Wait a day or so and then text her.

    In all honesty you biffed it after your first altercation and should just drop it unless you run into her like you did. But instead you called her out for not calling you back, and had to lie to you because you seem like a demanding creeper asking her why she didn't call you back...

    She may want to talk to you but you're throwing her mixed signals. You seem demanding, then you blow her off, then you try and friend zone her... I know you aren't, but maybe she thinks you're the crazy one? Not trying to be a dick, but slow it down, and don't care so much. You have an uphill battle if you want this one.
    Rule Number 1: You are not a PUA.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    Sorry dude I agree with Icarus on this one you should have suggested something less threatening for the second date women can sense when a man just want sex a mile away. And then you accused her of being high maintenance because she didnít want to come over for dinner. Had you played it a little differently you couldíve been farking her right now but you became accusatory and demanding which turned her off and she just wanted to be friends.

    You had several opportunities to turn this around for example with the cell phone situation in the subway but you chose the arrogant jerk route and became demanding once more which are signs of desperation, and asking her to call you to hang out showed neediness. Her lack of responding to your texts and calls is her way of seeing how confident you are and if you have a social life yet you continue to keep going in the opposite direction of being confident and alpha. I suggest you read up on some articles on this site to help you with your game. T-mal, I, Cody, Icarus and several others have postings or articles to help you so take advantage of it. Like Icarus said if you want this woman it will be an uphill fight but not impossible given you change your attitude towards her.

  9. #9
    Sandrager is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    i agree with Icarus anf Flyer ..my words exactly nothing more to say
    sand

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Girl Says No, Acts Interested, Then Lies - WTF?

    I think she likes you and keeps giving you chances to seduce her, but you're not doing that well so she can only respond according to her biology. Keep practicing and learning. And don't invite her directly to your place for a date unless you've already had sex. It's just safer that way.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."


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