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  1. #1
    SonnyCurtis is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Make them chase me, need to get out of my own head

    Problem: I'm too in my head about chicks. Put too much stock in the outcome. Psych myself out or look desperate. Reason being: I'm a virgin very inexperienced. Despite that, I'm going to adopt the attitude that only a special girl is worth my time and it will take more than a nice ass for me to be interested. I wanna stop seeing girls as just potential first hook ups and see them for who they really are. I wanna be completely in the moment, if anything the goal is to get better at talking/flirting in addition to socializing in general. In the meanwhile I've been dieting, exercising, trying to go out more, etc. I play and sing in a band, we kick ass. That's taking off.

    From my understanding, if I follow this path the broads will start to chase me. Then I pick the one(s) I like from the bunch and make my move. Am I getting this right? Guess I just need some reassurance. Tryna stay off the path of self-destruction. any further tips on this topic are welcome. Thanks dudes

  2. #2
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Make them chase me

    Eh, sleep with random girls you are just trying to have fun with. You don't want to be completely inexperienced when you finally meet "the one" I suppose. There is no problem with having high standards, just make sure you aren't setting them to unachievable levels.

    Part of having confidence is knowing what you can do...you can't really achieve this mentality for real unless you aren't afraid of women. Only having half of this coin can make you come off as a total tool.
    KISS - Keep it Stupid Simple

  3. #3
    SonnyCurtis is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Make them chase me

    That's the problem dude... I can't just have fun and sleep with random girls. Every time the potential for hooking up is evident the girl becomes "the one" in my head. The long-awaited first, yknow. And that kills the whole thing. It's almost like I'm self-sabotaging cus I'm afraid. So my plan is to be completely non-goal oriented. Whichever girl I hook up with is the lucky one not me. In the meanwhile I talk/flirt with girls while getting myself into shape. I'm going for abundance mentality, focus on doing my thing and then snag one of the ladies that enters into my life. The other way has failed me for 10+ years.

    But I appreciate the comment. Hopefully I articulated myself clearly, feel free to chime back in. Any comments semi-relevant or otherwise are welcome, I could use the help.

  4. #4
    sidewinder89 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Make them chase me

    If my experience is anything to go by you'll be hung up on your virginity until you lose it... Once I slept with a girl I calmed down, it's merely a fear of the unknown.

  5. #5
    SonnyCurtis is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Make them chase me, need to get out of my own head

    I feel ya man. Just trying to look for some kinda way around that cus it's really hampering my game. It's not just the virgin thing, i only kissed a girl once and i was blackout drunk. I'm diagnosed with social phobia so it's hard for me. I've really made strides with that but I'm still anxious as hell about girls. That's why I'm tryna focus on myself get that straight and I hope the rest follows.

    Thanks for the comment man. Keep em coming guys literally any tips/thoughts are useful.. Thanks

  6. #6
    linking is offline Banned
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    Default Re: Make them chase me, need to get out of my own head

    I gotta say Iv known a lot if guys with pretty tight game, but until they lose their virginity they have the same issue as you do. I look at it like this....when I walk into a club even tho Iv kissed fuck knows how many girls and slept with a lot as well, until I get the first set out of the way and sometimes even the first kiss of the night I feel a little nervous. After that the nerves go away I slip back into the groove so to speak and my game just gets better and better all night......this is how I look at guys losing their virginity....once you do it once it's no longer such a big deal and you'll stop feeling that way about every girl.........at least that's how it was for me and for a lot of the guys Iv known go through it since.

    Linking x


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