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Thread: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

  1. #1
    OhSnap is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    So'.. I've meet this girl and we've connected on the following day. We relate to the same problem, friends and way of thinking. Basicly we are almost exactly the same mentally.

    She's cute, attractive but young, I'm not looking for a relationship since I've been able to be comfortable with girls for the past months and deeply inside, I'd love a relationship but at the moment, I don't want one.

    So basicly what happended was we meet and talked on the phone the second day at night for 3 hours. From there we really connected, she started telling me her problems and how she see's things. She kind of blew my mind since, I thought and experienced most of her things. I even told her ''We got really comfortable fast'' and ''We relate to stuff a lot'' I have told her that same day I'm not looking for a relationship.

    Yet following from the phone day, we've texted and all but everyday, I have the feeling this is going in the direction of a relationship and I'm not down with that. At the moment she's the one running after me which is cool but still it seems this is going towards a relationship, the fact I'm answering her as if I was a boyfriend (realized this recently) isn't helping so basicly I'm giving mixed messages.

    I have flirted with her but not sexually enough.. I believe its because of that.

    How could I either get her to just be a Fark buddy or into an open relationship?

    Thanks homies.
    ablindman's new account, pm me if you need help.

  2. #2
    Mr8Hyde6's Avatar
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    Default Re: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    Many girls may hear u say u don't want a relationship, but, they don't really hear it. Same for guys... Sometimes they think, well maybe I can change his mind...

    She seems already emotionally attached to you and the vibes u r giving her are not helping... U can tell her flat out. Again. In a more direct way.

    Or u can ask to b f buddies. Although from experience, girls always get more attached unless ur just awful.

    Or, u can be shady and back away slowly. Although that can be seen as hard to get and she will come harder for u.


    This is a thin ice situation. You seem like a nice guy since you actually care enough to write this post so I am sure you don't want to really hurt her feelings or lead her on...

    Typically f buddies are established in the beginning of a "relationship". But now she seems to be really into you so that will be real tough.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    I thought of that and guess what, I just meet her this Sunday! She's into me and I know it. And yeah I'm far from trying to hurt her feelings. I remember her telling me these ''I don't need sex to feel okay'' ''I don't fall for guys just for their looks'' ''. What I believe is that I wasn't sexual enough with her. I'm going to the movies with her to (Yeah I know its also a spot that couples would go to)
    ablindman's new account, pm me if you need help.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    Sounds like she gets attached pretty quick. May be a warning sign

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    Sounds like it.. I might just tell her straight at the movies if anything goes on, I'm still going to try playing her as I do. Any Tip you got in mind to void it.

    I plan telling her something like I'm not planing to be exclusive.
    ablindman's new account, pm me if you need help.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    My best policy is honesty. Be forward w it.

    If she wants more, it'll save u a hugeeee headache in the future.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    This happened exactly to me too " having a great connection with the girl , and her getting attached to me " But the fact is you never discuss the relation ship between you and if she does ask just say that "this is a bad time for me " or something like that ( i used" this is a bad time for me since i always work as a semi trucker ") meaning always gone
    so what i did was just started messing around with her and then i farked her and later she asked me
    "So what are we "
    And I said
    "Two friends having fun" or was it "two adults having fun " didn't matter to me
    of course she wanted "us to date " but i said always said that i was too busy for a relationship ,but " we can always fark , then she gave me an ultimatum saying we can either date and fark or we could only be friends , so i said lets be friends
    the thing is not even a week into this new friendship she calls me up to Fark
    and i say "sure" and we mess around for awhile
    then a month latter she said she found a bf and we cant mess around
    At this point i say "No problem" ( she is trying to see how invested i am , or something like a mind game . the key thing just act cool "everything is no problem ' or 'everything is cool" or "respect' or 'sure' like whatever )
    not even a month passes and we are back farking ,
    THIS IS BEEN GOING ON FOR OVER A YEAR NOW
    And now i can't drive my license is suspended so i don't drive truck , but my excuse is I'm just to busy for a relationship
    And like Mr8hyde6 said girls think they can change your mind ! Just don't let that happen and you will be safe

  8. #8
    OhSnap is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    Yeah, basicly since I'm not that busy and all I actually want to do is meet new people and girls WITHOUT having to worry for a girl over my shoulder is to say ''I'm not ready to be exclusive to any girl'' from there toss in a compliment or what not. Still first time this happends to me and I'm kinda' tripping at first xD
    ablindman's new account, pm me if you need help.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    Just don't worry about it!
    Girls think that they can wrap you around their finger by using s3x or using ultimatums
    just don't pay any attention to those and the problem will work itself out itself
    "but thats just my opinion , all situations are different , you might end up missing your left nut if the girl goes nuts "

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Looks like a relationship, but I don't want one.

    Well if it does happend, I'll just walk off. I know she's puling tests on me tho'. She'd the one who asked me out to the movies and asked me why did I say yeah. I'll just go for what I want, if it doesn't work out, I'll be honest and eject.
    ablindman's new account, pm me if you need help.


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