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  1. #1
    BroadswordWSJ is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Help me out the friend zone - I need to do this

    A few months ago I went out with this girl I met years ago but we kinda lost touch. We had an amazing time, a good laugh and never struggled for conversation. We honestly have about a million things in common and even think the same way, have similar opinions on things & even some quirky weird stuff thats quite similar too. We flirted a little & I tried to escalate things on by toucjing her every once in a while and even held her hand and had my arm round her at various points & she seemed ok with it & didn't shrug me off. When we stood in the taxi queue at the end of the night I still couldnt really tell if she liked me or not, I madly wanted to kiss her but I bottled it.

    I don't know what she was thinking after that night...was she waiting for me to kiss her & then turned off when I didn't? Who knows. But I'm kicking myself that I passed an opportunity to kiss her - even if she gave me the cheek thats fair enough - its the fact i didn't act thats driving me nuts.

    Since then all the fizz and playfulness has slowly disapeared from our texts, we've went to the cinema twice and become friends, and we text like friends.

    Its frustrating because there's potential for us, and in our texts leading up to that night and for a short while after it was going well. There was definitly something there that night. The only thing we're missing is sexualness, intimacy - whatever you want to call it.

    I'm sure everyone will reply and say that changing things will be almost impossible or to give up. I like this girl, being just friends is driving me insane. My only options are to try again or walk away completely but I'm not ready to take the 2nd option yet. I'm aware this could be almost impossible, the friendship could end and it could take a few months but I need to do this.

    Can anyone help please? How do I get that flirty spark back & re-create the vibe we had that night we went out? How do I potentially make this girl see me as more than a friend?

    I'm thinking things like: Being unavailable, being busy, acting not so interested, giving her space and not speaking or seeing her for a few weeks, when I see her next kino a bit more and act more manly and flirty etc.....

    There's a whole lote more I could say about this girl, the night we were out, other stuff etc but this post is already long enough. Can anyone please help, or has experience doing this?

  2. #2
    uluvtheLD is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Help me out the friend zone - I need to do this

    You need to reframe. You are acting too nice and buddy buddy with her. Give yourself some space, and only talk to her when she contacts you and be VERY brief. She will wonder whats wrong, and thats what you want her thinking. You need tension.

    After that.... ask her to something more exciting than a movie. That way you can be exciting too and not just sit there. Now you will be primed to game her with creating attraction and arousal. She may be somewhat resistant at first so you have to start with some very light playful KINO but definitely escalate and prepare for some shit tests and LMR.

  3. #3
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    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Help me out the friend zone - I need to do this

    Always....assume.... attraction.

    It's not about if it's true or not. It's about making sure that ALL your behavior filters through that mindset. Because you didn't have this mindset you didn't push for that kiss. You may have even got sex if you had this mindset. Oh the possibilities...

    That's the first thing. Second thing.....PUSH....PU LL.

    Say something nice, then something playful. Pull her towards you, then push her away. Something like "You're hair looks really nice today. But I like it better when it's up/down." If she says something like "Well I'm not trying to impress you..." Go back to always assuming attraction and say "Oh it's cute when you try to play hard to get." Then change the subject immediately. This is just a tiny speck of the possibilities when having this mindset and using push/pull.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  4. #4
    BroadswordWSJ is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Help me out the friend zone - I need to do this

    Thanks for this.

    I'm definitly going to give her some space for a few weeks, wait for her to text me and be pretty brief with her. Some of the stuff you said i already knew I guess.

    I'm still worried I blew it that night though and that any potential interest she'd had in me has reached like 0% in thelast couple of months. Guess I'll wait & see.


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