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Thread: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

  1. #11
    johnnybob62 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    thanks again for the replies but im in college, just a fyi.

  2. #12
    johnnybob62 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    i need some more help guys, i cant handle this. he almost found out.

    idk what to do. she was really drunk last night and idk if she said anything.

    but just in case, if he does find out, how can i face this?

  3. #13
    hometownextra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    This depends how close of friends you are with him. Also how much you want to make it work with her.

    Shortly put there is no right answer.what has been done has been done for some time. If they are still dating shame on her for not calling an end to it.

    The last point is karma is a beotch, it so happens in this instance she wasn't feeling what she needed and looked for a different outlet to get it, whatever that may be.

    Tell him piss her off, don't tell piss him off. At this point it is about which one you wish to keep closer to you. I feel it comes down to what you want. If it was a one time deal with her it makes it easer on you but if not then it is much more complicated in that instance, I do not envy you.

    What is the status between you an her ultimately decides this one. Are you planning to be with her or not?
    Learn to be a better person not a better player.

  4. #14
    johnnybob62 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    Quote Originally Posted by hometownextra View Post
    This depends how close of friends you are with him. Also how much you want to make it work with her.

    Shortly put there is no right answer.what has been done has been done for some time. If they are still dating shame on her for not calling an end to it.

    The last point is karma is a beotch, it so happens in this instance she wasn't feeling what she needed and looked for a different outlet to get it, whatever that may be.

    Tell him piss her off, don't tell piss him off. At this point it is about which one you wish to keep closer to you. I feel it comes down to what you want. If it was a one time deal with her it makes it easer on you but if not then it is much more complicated in that instance, I do not envy you.

    What is the status between you an her ultimately decides this one. Are you planning to be with her or not?
    No, i dont want to date her. Shes a cheater, obviously. She was just some insanely hot girl that came on to me who i never could dream about getting. I couldnt turn her down. But it just so happened she was going out with my friend.

  5. #15
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    LockDown is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    Lol I was just thinking what would your friend do in the reverse situation? Would he sleep with YOUR super hottie? From how you describe him, I think he would.

    OK so I believe the burden of proof is on her. She obviously took the initiative by giving you her number. She has cheated on him before, so she is obviously using you. She probably screws more guys than you know.

    You can explain it to him FULLY if it bothers you that much. But FULLY. Even the whole 'haven't been with a whole lot of women' thing (don't be super honest about your virginity. Its not his business and he may bad mouth you later). Don't hold anything back and don't place blame. It just happened. You saw her as a friend who needed someone to talk to. Things just escalated. Again, its her responsibility to tell him. As long as your honest, he won't be mad at you forever. He might not be your bro any longer but that's what happens in life sometimes.

    You get a pass cuz of the V issue, but in the future be a little more selective... especially if you'll have a lot of moral issues to work out as a result.
    Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.
    Oscar Wilde


  6. #16
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    I'd say laying the cards on the table isn't the worst idea then. If there will be no long term relationship with her because of the trust issue.

    Sounds like she played you on this one. I assume they are still dating. It is a rough one but the integrity of admitting to the guilt may spare the friendship you have with your buddy. Ya, he will be pissed for a while but truthfully explain what happened.

    You may want more opinions though before you go ahead with it.

    Agree with above what would he have done and it is all on her she seduced you.
    Learn to be a better person not a better player.

  7. #17
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    You have two options:

    1) Shut up and hope it blows over; or

    2) Tell your friend and deal with the consequences.

    IMO it comes down to how close you are with your friend. If you guys are really good friends then you should tell him yourself. Play up the fact that she seduced you. Honestly, it seems like you got taken advantage of in this situation. You're kind of her bitch until he finds out. Don't let her hold hostage.

    Otherwise, if you're not really close with your friend I'd just wait it out and see what happens.

    If I was in your shoes I would just come clean regardless. But that's me.
    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

  8. #18
    hometownextra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    The Duke again not sugar coating it short simple and to the point very sound advice
    Learn to be a better person not a better player.

  9. #19
    johnnybob62 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    Alright, so its summer now, it blew over and i didnt say anything. Now this girl is telling me she wants to visit me and wants me to visit her. Im not trying to date her, shes a cheater...I dont know what i should do, i dont know if her and my friend are still dating or not.

    Advice?

  10. #20
    Sandrager is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Well it finally happened! But i am in a big pickle.

    I would say so you don't put yourself in the same situation talk to your friend first.


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