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  1. #1
    tonystark88 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default So I'm hanging out with this girl after a year of being friendzoned. Advice

    So I met this awesome girl about a year ago. We had connected on fb through something which I forgot but it took like another year to meet. She was 28 busy working 3 jobs to pay for school. I thought we connected really well on a short coffee date and she kept on commenting how much we had in common.

    A week or so later we went to see this dnace show and I took her to this dinner ( it was way to fancy but it was based on a suggestion from a friend who described it a little differently). After dinner we walked there was some joking kino since we are both fighters but touching sure. At dinner she had mentioned when we talked about dating that since she is from europe she didn't like the whole pressured feeling of kissing and it takes her a while to get to know someone. After dinner we walked like 30 blocks talking, joking some kino, and for some weird reason I grabbed her hand like I was in third grade. She didn't say no though. At one point in the conversation we were talking about dating and she said she had only met one person of my background but they ended up just being friends. Later my insecurities maybe thought she was giving me a hint. Anyways went in the for kiss later after sitting close outside in an intimate setting but she was ready or something.

    A week later I asked her to hang out and and after being a little unresponsive she said she said sure as friends. I responded by "well right now I have plenty of friends but I wish the best". she said thanks you too.

    At the time I may have texted her a little too much every couple days or so. Anyways I was bummed about the situation. I know in pua and most girls I meet you have to kiss right away but some people from other cultures move slower and would prefer not to get burned.

    Anyways so I moved on. Not a single more text message. I forgot to remove her from facebook and about 3 months later occasionally she would like my statuses. It's strange in this digital age to still be connected with someone you only went out with a couple times but i'm ok with that. About a couple months later after one of these likes I sent her a short message hoping that everything was ok with her after a hurricane we had. A couple months later the same stuff happened. She would like my stuff or sometimes comment and then a couple weeks later I would send her a short message and catch up. Then about a month ago we had a real sort of fb conversation. I said why don't we get coffee sometime. She said sure.

    I said no pressure whenever you are free. I asked her if she still had my number and she gave me hers. I waited about 10 days and texted her and with her school she was busy but we made tentative plans for the weekend. I cancelled on since I had something else going on, and well nowadays I don't wanna do shit I don't wanna do so that day I wanted to rest. The following week I asked her if she wanted to hang out the next week and she said she can only do weekends. I said how about sunday and she said she might go the beach, so I told her ok no problem don't cancel you plans we can meet another time. She said well this or this but really was saying it wasn't a plan. I then asked her to go to the zoo since I know she likes animals. She said sure but suggested some botanical gardens but I expressed that I'd rather see some tiger than a tulip.

    Now I'm not obsessed with this chick or anything and am writing this long story cause I'm hungover after meeting chicks last night and can't sleep cause its too hot. I thought I'd ask the crew out there for some advice.

    At one point I was asking her about some martial arts class she takes cause I wanted to do it. She mentioned when I asked the cost she said she got a discount by dating someone there. I'm not sure if thats current but I can't imagine committing to chilling . Seems like she is interested to meet. I hope I didn't screw myself up by committing to a whole day date from what was supposed to be a short coffee. Do I pay since I invited her or make her go dutch?

    Also I've seen two schools of though on the previously friendzoned stuff. One is to be charming and cool and try to do all the kino stuff again. That almost seems like doing the same stuff from the beginning as before and might possibly get there same result. The 2nd is to to be charming and cool but not pay her that attention to mess with her so you're not as available and make her want you. But then again I don't wanna just act like friends and get the same result as friends.

    So if you got some advice I'd appreciate it

  2. #2
    marvilo's Avatar
    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: So I'm hanging out with this girl after a year of being friendzoned. Ad

    She's messing with you. When you said you've got plenty of friends and what not, I really liked that line. What you did there made her think and that's why she kept on liking and commenting your stuff on fb. You shouldn't have asked her for the coffee though. Leave her alone and let her chase you. I use to have that problem with some of my ex ( I think I still do.) but talk to different girls and live life. There's so many prettier girls out there besides her. She basically knows thr she can control you now. Here's what she thinks " hmm if I can mess with his mind he'll come back and we can do this all over again". Say Fark that and go live YOUR LIFE!!!!! Don't be needy to her
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

  3. #3
    tonystark88 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: So I'm hanging out with this girl after a year of being friendzoned. Ad

    I'm not but I put in my post its been a year and now we are meeting up


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