Alright fellas, this HB9 and I have been talking on and off on FB for the past 2 weeks or so. Long time, I know, I'm not worried about it though. I messaged her last Wednesday and here's how it went.
Me: Dear, big dork, I'm feeling some ice cream this Friday. Roll with me! Sincerely, the real slim shady.
HB: How do I know your not some crazy weird psycho stalker?!?!!!
Me: ... exactly why I picked an ice cream place. Somewhere low key and in public in case you're nuts!
HB: Too bad I worked for 7 hours Friday and 6 today...$/&/$:8/jajsf!
Me: Awwweeee, poor little baby! Let me play something for you on the world's smallest violin *rolls eyes*. Cupcake, you're talking to the wrong guy when it comes to sympathy over work. Try serving dumb ass people who want "extra Ranch!" for 30 hours in 3 days.
HB: Hahahahah Shuttup mr.Krabs! Where do you work?? 30 hours in 3 days that's ridiculous
Me: Longhorn at the mills. Waiter hours suuuck!
HB: Awweh :// Maybe I'll come visit you sometime!
Me: No, stay home . At least until I figure out your crazy level...
She didn't message me back until last night (took her 3 days). Last night she messaged me this...
HB: haha just realized I never answered you when you followed me on instagram lolllll
I viewed the message yesterday morning so she knew I saw it, but I haven't messaged back yet haha. Where should I go with this and how do you think it's going? I feel pretty confident about it so far.
For those who requested the conversation before this part:
Me:Ok you accepted my friend request request, now I know you can be trusted. Let's go rob that bank.
HB: Hahaha yeah uhm about that... I happen to be busy. Sorry pal
Me: Hey whatever, buddy. It's ok anyway, you're a brunette.. nothing but trouble.
HB: Pffft you don't know the half of it
HB: Just kidding! I'm innocent
Me: Haha! That's what they all say. You probably "don't take long to get ready" either.
HB: Actually I don't even like prepare myself for school loll I look like a bum everyday.
Me: Schools beat anyway. Some days I don't even wear pants.
HB: Hahahaha same. I free ball it
Me: I thought I noticed a bulge in your pants.. You're name is really, Nate, isn't it?
HB: Well.. Nathaniel but Nate for short of course
I ignored her for a few hours until that afternoon, then messaged her with..
Me: You'll never believe what just happened....
Me: First off, I had ice cream, then I had Primanti Bros., then I had olive garden dessert.... Then I had ice cream again... SUCKERRRR!
HB: ... Go fuck yourself
HB: I love I've cream more then anything ((
HB: Hahahaha I'm soo jealous
Me: Don't even get me started on ice cream. That was my favorite dessert first...
HB: Hahaha I love ice cream! Thanks for taking me ya big jerk
Me: Easy, sassy pants, we have to message some more first, just so I can make sure you're not crazy.
HB: Haha well... I mean I'm a little crazy.
Me: Maybe we shouldn't get ice cream. Being with someone of my caliber may throw you into an attack & I'll have to put you in the straight jacket again.
HB: Looks like we're just gonna have to to and find out
Me: I'll bring my taser! I could go for some chocolate soft serve.
HB: Taser!? :O
HB: Uhh yeah actually I forgot I have a uhm... Funeral on that day. Sorry cant make it
Me: That works out great for me because I'm probably going to have conjunctivemelito that week. We might be able to when I'm better though, & if you don't strike out.
HB: Conjunctivemelito huh? Funny never heard of it. Must be rare.but yeah I shouldn't strike out that day don't have any a Hesiod baseball games
Me: I wouldn't be surprised if you did. You can barely put a sentence together....
HB: Hahaha shutup autocorrect screws me over
Me: Just as long as that's the only thing screwing you, Sicko.
HB: Ccome on terd... You should know me and autocorrect are in love
Then I never messaged her back. So there you have it! Feel free to send me some feed back!