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  • 1 Post By T-Mal

Thread: What am I doing wrong?

  1. #1
    j0rg is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default What am I doing wrong?

    I am currently 18 and met up with an old friend. Previously we have flirted a lot through text, though for some reason it never really went anywhere. I asked her if she was free any time soon and she said yes and came over.
    We pretty much watched movies. I was flirting with her which had her smiling/laughing most of the time, which eventually led to us kissing a few times. Unfortunately she had to leave shortly after so i couldn't take it further.
    It appeared as if she had fun all day, she was smiling and laughing all day, she told me she was really happy she got to kiss me, and also told me she really wants to see me again.

    When she left she asked me to text her, so i texted her and she seemed "cold" towards me.
    I figured i should leave it at that and wait for her to text/call me first, and ask me to do something.
    It's been about a week and she still seems uninterested. where did i go wrong? This has happened twice (almost exactly the same situation) and would really appreciate someone telling me where i am going wrong. The first time the girl totally lost interest in me and I didn't see her again, it feels as if the same is happening now.

    Thanks

  2. #2
    lenric's Avatar
    lenric is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: What am I doing wrong?

    Quote Originally Posted by j0rg View Post
    I am currently 18 and met up with an old friend. Previously we have flirted a lot through text, though for some reason it never really went anywhere. I asked her if she was free any time soon and she said yes and came over.
    We pretty much watched movies. I was flirting with her which had her smiling/laughing most of the time, which eventually led to us kissing a few times. Unfortunately she had to leave shortly after so i couldn't take it further.
    It appeared as if she had fun all day, she was smiling and laughing all day, she told me she was really happy she got to kiss me, and also told me she really wants to see me again.

    When she left she asked me to text her, so i texted her and she seemed "cold" towards me.
    I figured i should leave it at that and wait for her to text/call me first, and ask me to do something.
    It's been about a week and she still seems uninterested. where did i go wrong? This has happened twice (almost exactly the same situation) and would really appreciate someone telling me where i am going wrong. The first time the girl totally lost interest in me and I didn't see her again, it feels as if the same is happening now.

    Thanks
    That's what you did wrong.

    .................... ...............

  3. #3
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: What am I doing wrong?

    It may not be because you texted her....
    But it might be because of WHAT you texted her.

    If it was anything like the following, then THAT is the problem:

    "Hi, you said to text you, so I am"
    "Hey, what's up?"
    "Yo! How you doin?"
    "Hey, it's xxxx I'm texting you."
    "Whatcha doin?"
    "Hey, how was your day?"


    etc...

    Your texts should be spunky, funny, sassy, witty & confident.
    Make her laugh... make her smile... stand out from every other guy who has her number.
    Doing that will make her see you as being more interesting & she'll want to know more.



    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  4. #4
    j0rg is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What am I doing wrong?

    Thanks for the advice guys.
    I do admit when my text was quite boring. But is it really possible to absolutely ruin everything with just a single text? She seemed really into me.

    If so, is there a way for me to recover?

  5. #5
    lenric's Avatar
    lenric is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: What am I doing wrong?

    It depends. If in person you're really fun and etc and your texts are boring, you're not being congruent.

  6. #6
    Swagman's Avatar
    Swagman is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: What am I doing wrong?

    Quote Originally Posted by j0rg View Post
    Thanks for the advice guys.
    I do admit when my text was quite boring. But is it really possible to absolutely ruin everything with just a single text?
    Yes, it is possible. There was a girl a long time ago where I was awesome with her in person, but I sent her a stupid text about my dog licking my other dog's ear, and that just about destroyed it for me with her. That was back when I was really socially incompetent. I won't go into anymore stories about me being a moron

    Quote Originally Posted by j0rg View Post
    If so, is there a way for me to recover?
    Depends on how you address it. At the moment, your chances are slim to none. After a few months, I did text that girl again, and she did respond. If I had only knew what I know now, I would have been able to rekindle things with her.

    So my answer is just that. Back off from her, and then re-approach at a latter time when the moments between you two is far down the river.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  7. #7
    j0rg is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What am I doing wrong?

    Ah that really does suck. Was wanting to take it further with her.
    Will read up on some of the information here and improve.

    Cheers for the responses guys


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