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  1. #1
    zacst133 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Initiate flirting with goody type girl

    Hey guys, I could use some help here.

    Some background info on me is that the game is pretty new knowledge to me, I am interested in the game because I have never pursued a girl, they have always pursued me. I would say my pros are I am confident, strong (I mean mentally but also very physically fit, I wrestled in college), good looking, and intelligent. Think captain of a college wrestling team but with a nerd side. I would say my cons are that I am quiet at first and have trouble making conversation until I know someone, I can make things a bit awkward at first because I try to hard to act comfortable, and physically I'm short. That being said, I have never had trouble making a move on a girl after flirting but the girls have always flirted with me first. Also, a few months ago, I ended a 3 year relationship with a great girl that found me via Facebook stalking, kinda weird but it was flattering. Anyways, I am ready to pursue a girl but I don't know what the best way is to initiate flirting with a particular girl.

    Background info on the girl, she was also an athlete but more focused on academics, very intelligent, I would say hb8 or hb9 but the classy type. I don't think she was ever in a relationship in college but I couldn't say for sure. Think typical good girl, close with family, intelligent, but super down to earth and very kind.

    She and I were acquaintances (at best) at big college. We were both athletes so we pretty much knew each other by default, at a lot of the same banquets, and stuff like that. We never hung out or talked more than "hey, how are you?" type of talk in college but she is a year ahead of me and I just graduated and she is finishing her first year in the work force. I knew that she traveled a lot for her job and I am starting a job in St. Louis, so I thought it was worth looking into. I messaged her on Facebook and we talked back and forth for awhile until I got her number and we messaged for awhile. I found out she is on a long term project an hour from STL and flies in and out of the airport all the time. So, my first weekend in STL she happened to be working and had Sunday off so I asked her to meet up. She said she was already planning to meet her other girlfriend in STL to go to the Arch but asked me to join. Of course I said yes and suggested brunch before. Her friend ended up canceling last minute so it was just us doing brunch and visiting the arch together. I think it went well but very platonic, mind you it was our first time ever talking more than a few words. She talked a lot and I listened, nodded, and agreed a lot (but not just to agree). There was never an awkward moment but I also felt like any type of flirting would be forced. We hugged when we left and said the normal goodbye, see ya around type stuff.

    I texted here an AFC type text later that day saying something like "I had a great time. I would love to get together again. Hopefully its sooner rather than later." She responded and we carried on limited texting throughout the week.

    She always responds to my texts but it can sometimes be a day or so later but she also works like 60 hours between Mon-Thurs, so I understand why she doesn't get back right away and she always apologizes if it's been a while. I still can't tell if she is just that genuinely nice or if she is interested in me and just isn't used to dating.

    So I am pretty sure we will hang out again and I'm trying to frame it more like a date this time, possibly go to a baseball game together but I'm afraid if I let another meet up go without moving forward, all will be lost.

    Sorry for any erroneous information but I'm really interested in seeing where this could go so I want all the information on the table. I wouldn't even say I have a crush on this girl but on paper she is perfect relationship material for me and I want to see if we something will spark if I start flirting. So, I would love any suggestions on how you guys might go about this situation. Thanks for reading and even more for responding!

  2. #2
    lilsting's Avatar
    lilsting is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Initiate flirting with goody type girl

    You're doing okay. Your only real issue was not working on attraction from the beginning. She's comfortable, you have the rapport, all that's missing is attraction. That's where a lot of guys go wrong. If something is not framed in a certain way, they don't take any chances. I would have treated it like a date, even if that wasn't the context. How? I would have complimented her in the beginning. Joked on her through out the day (like threatening to body slam her if she gets out of hand, jokingly of course). You could use the fact that you're a wrestler to kino. I would have linked arms with her too when walking or at least tried too.

    Setup up another meet up as soon as you can and apply the tips from the first paragraph. You may want to start working phone game in too since people have a tendency to fark up through text. Be smart and don't be needy. You know she works a lot so be smart when contacting her to reduce your chances of her not responding.

  3. #3
    zacst133 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Initiate flirting with goody type girl

    Thanks for the response, that all makes sense. I wanted to compliment her and I was thinking of compliments all day I just couldn't get them to come out. I was second guessing them because they felt random but who doesn't like compliments. Also on the the phone vs. text, I would say I'm probably better at text game, one of my strong suits and I've tried a bit of flirting through there and she doesn't really give any back but I definitely haven't been needy or overbearing, I've done that before while suffering from one-itis. If I did decide to go phone game, what do you think would be best for that? I can't think of a good reason to call her and I don't want to be AFC and say oh I just wanted to call to say hi.

  4. #4
    lilsting's Avatar
    lilsting is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Initiate flirting with goody type girl

    Depends on how good you are at phone game. Some pros can bring a girl to orgasm over the phone. Personally, I'm not that good yet. I would personally just use to just to keep in contact because it's more personal than texting and it separates yourself from everyone else. Before I answer how to approach it, when do you think the next time you guys will hang out is?

  5. #5
    zacst133 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Initiate flirting with goody type girl

    That's a tough question, possibly next weekend and if not I'm not sure when. She normally flies in Monday morning and flies out Friday early afternoon and she travels to other parts of the country to visit friends a lot on the weekends. I don't think I'm in a place where I can get her to stay in stl yet because she normally just stays with friends when she visits but I have a studio apartment with no couch so I don't think she would go for that just yet. My best bet is to catch her when she has to work a weekend and she did mention having to work over Father's Day and 4th of July, so those could be good options. Other than that I'm not sure how to go about it. The first time she happened to be planning to come to stl already.


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