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Thread: shyness and aproach! please help asap!!

  1. #1
    djj33zyjr is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Exclamation shyness and aproach! please help asap!!

    ok let me start off with im no where attractive! i have the right clothes you need now aways yeah! but i am reallly shy like when peoplpe get to know me i can keep the convo running for hours but when i dont know anyone my convos go dead! i just dont gain the nerve to step up and walk up to the girl! like on the bus the other day theyre was a girl there and she was a hb 7.5 she was amazing! but i couldnt get the nerve to get to hre she was even alone! and i dont know exactly what i should say when i approach! what if they are rude to me? and tlel me to get lost? thats awkward as! so if anyone can help me with this it would be highly apreciated!

  2. #2
    aussiearef is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: shyness and aproach! please help asap!!

    I don't know how you should cure your shyness but I think you MUST cure it by any means. Shy people convey this message that they are hiding something. If you have nothing to hide you would not have any problem to show your real self to people.

    Your message is shouting lack of confidence. Your shyness has roots in your lack of confidence. I do encourage you to read Carlos Xuma's "Alpha Male Traits" ebook and do its exercises.

    Girls, especially young ones, tend to enjoy insulting low self-esteem and low-confidence guys. But normally it's very rare for girls to tell you "get lost" just because you have told them they are very pretty! Even the bichiest girl on this plant feels good by hearing that. So don't worry, girls won't bite you if you show them a bit of confidence.

    There is a page full of canned openers on this forum. There is also an iPhone app on App Store which has many many openers. Memorize one or two of them and say them to girls. I am not an expert but I guess indirect approach is better to begin with.

    My last advice is that you must be outcome independent. You must not care what might be the result of your approach. You must approach girls because you want to change yourself and cure your annoying shyness. You do it for the sake of doing it. If you get numbers and get laid, even better but if you don't, becoming a better man is already your prize.

  3. #3
    BatMan's Avatar
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    Default Re: shyness and aproach! please help asap!!

    If she tells you to get lost then there's something socially wrong with HER and not you. If you are just asking a question or making an observation, that is innocent. It's extremely extremely rare that a woman will respond as such. But holding that fear of reaction in your mind is giving you the excuse to not act. You have to wonder how many pleasant conversations you've missed because of an irrational fear.

    Don't have goal in mind. When you get more experience you can start a plan of attack. Your main focus right now should be to just say "hi" to people and ask them general questions. Either about your current environment, situation, or something about them personally. People like to talk about themselves. Everyone has a story to tell. Or you could just end it at "hi" with a nice smile. That's it.

    So get out of your head about where you can lead it and focus on just talking to people to to them. No agenda. It'll help you tons on learning to be talkative.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

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