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  1. #1
    aussiearef is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default How to dump painlessly?

    Almost everybody on this forum wonders how to pick up buy exceptionally my problem is now how to dump!

    I picked up a Russian chick in early April and she spent 2 full months with me. That dating thing went a bit too far and she became kind of addicted to me so that she even lived with me for a 3-4 weeks!

    She is now back to Moscow but she wants to come back because she wants to be with me. I like her but I am sure she is not the woman that I want to be with for a long time. So although she wants me to send her an invitation letter so she get a visa to come to Australia, I am not happy to do so because I know she will expect to live with me and she wants me to support her etc. The worst thing is that I won't be able to practice my game and eventually I won't meet my dream girl! (how could i date another girl while this one lives in my house?!).

    Can you please give me a sound advice as to how to tell her although I like her I don't want to be with her for good? She will get upset very much and I am a very kind hearted man () so it's hard for me to say it directly. please help

  2. #2
    Wolf24's Avatar
    Wolf24 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to dump painlessly?

    For one thing, depending on my past experiences, flaking on a girl on a daily basis with some crappy excuses is more upsetting for her.

    If you prevent her to come see you by saying things like: "Uh yeah, you know I have a lot of work to do.", she might not be satisfied with your answer and keep coming after you. Depends on the chick but, it happens. Most of them can easily turn into dreaded stalkers because you were too nice to give an appropriate response and now she's in suspense.

    What I'd do is, I'd be honest without being harsh. There's nothing wrong in saying that: "I really like you because ___, but I don't feel like you're the one I'm looking for." If you can hold this frame successfully without getting defensive or insulting or whatever, she'll accept your thoughts and will thank you for not keeping her on the pedestal. If she gets mad eventhough you introduced and held that frame in good fashion, beep beep crazy girl alert!
    It's not about who I was or who I'm going to become.

    It's about who I am. Do it right here, right now.

  3. #3
    CaConfused is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to dump painlessly?

    Yeah, Im still trying to figure this out and am getting better at it.

    Sometimes they will flat out ask you for a relationship and that makes it easier.

    I have to 'dump' someone today or tomorrow. Not looking forward to it.

  4. #4
    Foxes is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: How to dump painlessly?

    It all depends on the girl really.

    Personally I try to be brutally honest, it's harsh but they will rather the honesty. If you are going to dump her just be a man about it, you might be able to salvage a friendship out of the whole thing.

    You don't really have to dump her you know, she might feel better dumping you. You don't have to become an asshole or cheat on her. You can become captain bland and his average acquaintances.

    Her: Hey whats up?
    You: cleaning the cat

    You have to become the most AFC boring dude to ever live. She will not want to be around you.

  5. #5
    dave_xxx's Avatar
    dave_xxx is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to dump painlessly?

    Tell her that since she has gone back to Russia that you have realized that you don't have feelings for her. You now want to pursue a relationship with another girl and that you can't see her anymore. Wish her well going forward.


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