So, it has been more or less one year since I learned about PUA and started learning various tips and techniques. However, I have the impression that I have not progressed that much.
Both my inner and outer game totally sucked initially. So, I focused on the things that could be fixed easily: I started working out, bought more trendy clothes and started meeting more people (usually at meetups or other activities). Even though I always had low confidence (thanks to those bullies that tortured me at school and uni), little by little I managed to change my mindset. I have a good job, am well-educated and have lived in several different countries, so I am not a complete loser. Going to the gym regularly also gave me lots of confidence and I just feel "stronger" for some reason. So, now, I can somehow manage to impress the ladies and get at least their contact details.
For example, I went to various events last week-end and acted confident but also a bit indifferent. I even bullsh1ted some girl how I was into japanese culture and she was staring at me in admiration, lol. Anyway, I got 3 numbers and have already planned to meet 2 of the girls. Now, the problem is that I usually screw up during the next step: I have never managed to get a second or third date.
My weakness is that I cannot "sell" myself nor make a move on a girl. What usually happens is that they act very interested in the beginning but then the attraction steadily falls. I miserably fail at keeping my tempo and I end up passing off as some boring dude. Seems like I do not have enough hobbies to be interesting enough (what can I do? I don't have too much free time to have regular or unusual hobbies, so I mainly hang out with my friends).
I have tried salsa courses and cooking classes but I am really not good at them (lol, at some point the girls were avoiding me as a dancing partner). I know that girls like men who can dance and cook, but I so freaking hate these type of activities. Seriously, if i had to pick up a hobby, it would kung-fu or swordfighting. It's a shame though as there are plenty of decent girls to meet at these events.
I have also tried learning about kino, micro-escalation, how to make small talk, DHVs, routines (which I have never managed to use on the field, btw). For some reason, I cannot get into it. I sometimes am too eager which translates as being desperate and other times I am too distant and they think I am not interested. I have an extremely hard time calibrating. Additionally, there's simply too much material to digest. I don't know what to do. I try not to think too hard about it and get the conversation flowing. but sometimes you do get a moment of silence, which is embarassing. I have observed how natural gamers behave but in vain. I cannot replicate their style. Maybe some guys have and some other are doomed to not grasp these concepts and remain a beta forever...
Moreover, I cannot totally open up to a stranger straight of the beginning. I need a couple of dates or more to feel more comfortable with any person. I suspect this plays against me as attraction does not last forever and I have to hit the steel while it's hot.
I try to remain positive but there are some days when I really feel down. PUA seems to me like sports or arts: you are either good at it or you aren't. You can improve a bit but you will always remain clumsy in the end...
Any advice would be welcome, guys.
Thanks and cheers.