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  1. #1
    Nikee is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Sticking point in texting....

    Ok guys here we go again, background story first:
    So I always go to this particular gas station all the time, and I always gett a fill up and a pack of skittles "dark side" ( lol my favorite). So eventually this on cashier noticed me because at some point they ran out of the kinda I like and I had to neg her for that, saying that their gas station sucks and that they should close if they don't have the "dark side" kind skittles.
    From that point on we start chit-chatting every time I stop by, and I could tell she was into me so I number close her.

    Start texting her maybe a week later ( was out of town partying) and this is how it went:
    Me: Just walked into the wrong changing room in a gym full of people... massively embarrassing, but good sightseeing tho lol...
    HB: who's this?
    Me: Ahaha wow you must be very popular, like Beyoncé popular!! Lol i will see you next time I come get some gas.
    HB: I never saved your # since it took you so long to actually text me

    I stop texting her at this point, and the next day:
    Me: I had so much fun in Orlando that I forgot about everything else. Trying to catch up, what your schedule look like
    HB: Right now I'm at Work I'm off tomorrow but I have class
    Me: Awesome. I will be checking books out at B&N myself tomorrow and want you to join in.
    HB: what time?
    Me: 8.32. And don't be late or no chocolate chip cookie for you!! Lol (inside joke about me like chocolate chip cookie)
    HB: Wait what.... I didn't say that was a good time
    Me: lol you never said that was a bad time either. Well i'll be there enjoying myself, join in and we can share that moment together.

    Well I went there read some material, but she didn't show up, I think she wanted me to formally invite here, that's why she didn't come but oh we'll I had fun regardless. So about five days later I built some more rapport ( as instructed in the M3 method) and found interesting things about here. And when the convo was at his high, I ejected.
    So about 3 days later (today), I opened her with:

    Me: Hey there. Just left your job, and saw brand new faces in your uniform. Lol i think I might make her my second favorite cashier 😊
    HB: hum um... Do you? (initially, after this I was going to transition into something else and have another convo, but for some reason I wanted to see her boundaries and if she really like me the way I think she does, so I got greedy)
    Me: Lol like we have a vice president to take over just in case something happen to the president, I think i should have a number 2 favorite too.
    Hb: that's your choice.

    Now I'm stuck guys I don't know if I should go cocky/funny or just stop and reopen another day? I sure don't want to apologize for my comment as it will make me look weak, but if she is hurt, I don't want to make it worse by saying something wrong. This is what I was thinking to send:
    *Me: wow, are you always that serious with everybody or it's just with me? Hang around with me long enough and you'll learn my sense of humor. What kind of trouble did you get into since the last time we talk, HB?

    What do you guys think of it? Any suggestion much appreciated.
    Thanks.
    Nikee --Just did it--

  2. #2
    ED11356's Avatar
    ED11356 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Sticking point in texting....

    In my opinion, you shouldn't have sent the Vice President text. Now she thinks you're probably a player or something (that you basically are just looking for sex).

    Also, apologizing is fine as long as you frame it correctly. However, I think that's much better to do in person than over text. Something like.."Sorry if I hurt you, sometimes I can be an asshole. What can I say?." Say that in person with a bit of a smile.

    I would personally do that, and not text. So whenever you get a chance, go to the gas station, find her, and apologize
    Always be honest with women. That's the true meaning of a PUA.

  3. #3
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    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Sticking point in texting....

    Stop and re-open another day. But in all fairness those threads were not good. You was basically bantering her and not allowing her to speak at all. You just made it all about yourself and you shouldn't have bragged to her about your day in Orlando/ sounded like you was trying to make her jealous. And you was really over doing on the openers and it made you look kind of needy with the paragraphs you sent her each time she sent you two or three words. Next time take it slow and talk to her like a normal person not as a game.
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

  4. #4
    Nikee is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Sticking point in texting....

    Quote Originally Posted by ED11356 View Post
    In my opinion, you shouldn't have sent the Vice President text. Now she thinks you're probably a player or something (that you basically are just looking for sex).

    Also, apologizing is fine as long as you frame it correctly. However, I think that's much better to do in person than over text. Something like.."Sorry if I hurt you, sometimes I can be an asshole. What can I say?." Say that in person with a bit of a smile.

    I would personally do that, and not text. So whenever you get a chance, go to the gas station, find her, and apologize
    Yea I knew I shouldn't have sent that last text, but really I don't know how to explain this but to me it's literally like a game at this point, I kinda push/pull try to work my numbers and see what to do and above all what not to do like right here. I ain't to focus about f closing at this point, but rather working on my game.
    Thanks for the feedback, and I'll try to use your approach next time I see her.
    Nikee --Just did it--

  5. #5
    Nikee is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Sticking point in texting....

    Quote Originally Posted by marvilo View Post
    Stop and re-open another day. But in all fairness those threads were not good. You was basically bantering her and not allowing her to speak at all. You just made it all about yourself and you shouldn't have bragged to her about your day in Orlando/ sounded like you was trying to make her jealous. And you was really over doing on the openers and it made you look kind of needy with the paragraphs you sent her each time she sent you two or three words. Next time take it slow and talk to her like a normal person not as a game.
    I wasn't try to brag about orlando, it's just that the day before I left, I when to fill my tank for the trip in the morning, which is not usual of me, as I always get gas at night on my way home. Plus I didn't know she was working that morning, and she asked why I was getting a fill up at 10 in the morning, then I joked that I was setting some love letters on fire, she laughed and then she was like "seriously, what's the deal?" and I told her I was going to Orlando for a couple of day, reason why I texted her about Orlando when she said I took long to write her.
    But I really need a fix in my text game and openers, what do you suggest?
    Nikee --Just did it--

  6. #6
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    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Sticking point in texting....

    You're text game is good. I think it's time to go to the next level. Being playful and flirtsy gets you so far. Get to a real level with her. Do you know her aspirations? Her hobbies? If she has pets? Siblings? Diseases? (lol) If not then that is an obvious sign that it's time to actually "get to know her" and have normal conversation with her and only teasing sprinkled in here and there.

    know some advocate the "tell her when and where to be without asking", but your father and grandfather got by just fine without our skills since they made YOU. I see nothing wrong with telling her when you're free and when is a good time for her. You just risk setting yourself up, like the way you just did, with that approach without finding out for sure if she can make it.

    I don't think you have to apologize. If she doesn't come forward with her issue with you then you risk looking weak cause she may have not been bothered by it at all. Assuming it bothered her is only one speculation. She could've been bored after that. Or didn't get it (stupid), never got the text, or something you can't account for. Don't assume it bothered her unless she confronts you with it.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  7. #7
    Slybootsucci is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Sticking point in texting....

    I decided the best way to text game is just to not fucking worry. Don't try to be such a player through text. There's too many follies to be had. I say just stay in touch with little fun texts, or funny pictures or negs etc periodically and never have long convos (unless you've f-closed before). Keep it simple and then whenever you want a date, make a phone call, and if she doesnt answer leave a voicemail with the details. If she's busy but interested she should let you know that she's busy. If she's not into it much she'll probably continually ignore the date offers. But if you're not being needy and you're just being periodically fun and showing her you're a bright and happy person and just want to poke fun, she shouldnt feel too afraid of accepting any dates you're offering.

    There's something about being in person that is soooo much better. I used to love the text game. And now as I try to get better and better from what was already a good point, I just get effectively WORSE. Eventually you start to overthink EVERYTHING. And that gets in the way of my spirituality in general. To try and be controlling of ANYTHING in my life. So since it breaks my own spiritual ethics, I am thus going with a safer strategy. I'm under the impression that when I'm with a girl, she can't get enough of me, but as soon as I get to texting it's a crap shoot nowadays so it's a waste of time to do anything but stay in touch. I can make every date 100x more interesting if I save all my questions, jokes, and dhv for the actual dates. Then she should start to associate me with seeing me in person and not just hearing from me. Because she gets more of me on a date than she does in between each date. Therefore if she's interested the best way for her to show it is to get me on more dates, hell maybe she'll start asking ME. That's the new strategy for me. You should give it a shot too. Hahah I'm jk, it's up to you what you like your game to be. But you really should try just not overthinking every text situation. If you're like me, eventually it will peak, and then ironically become you're downfall.

  8. #8
    ED11356's Avatar
    ED11356 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Sticking point in texting....

    Quote Originally Posted by BatMan View Post
    but your father and grandfather got by just fine without our skills since they made YOU.
    To be fair, things were a lot different back then.. haha.
    Always be honest with women. That's the true meaning of a PUA.

  9. #9
    Nikee is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Sticking point in texting....

    Quote Originally Posted by ED11356 View Post
    To be fair, things were a lot different back then.. haha.
    You're right to a certain extend ED, but i think the point Batman tried to highlight is that even with our "new skills", certain things don't change, the basics are still the same. And honestly I think that if I want to take this girl on d1, i'll have to invite her formally as "i want to such and such, I want you to join me, what's your schedule looks like?"
    Nikee --Just did it--

  10. #10
    Nikee is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Sticking point in texting....

    By the way I just read this stuff online about women being emotional creature and all that good stuff, and there was a point this guy was trying to make related to texting girls based on the fact that they are emotional creature, and i think it goes well with what happened to me and this HB.

    Anyways, the guy basically said that you should always stand out from other potential guys texting a girl by "aiming at her emotions while texting". He then said that while doing so you should avoid stimulating the same emotion all the time, but rather try to vary. He said, curiosity, happiness, sadness, and surprisingly even "anger" is the sort of emotions you can stimulate on rotation to keep her on her toes every time she receives a text from you. He explained that "anger" can be good as you stay on her mind throughout the whole day. For example, when somebody suddenly cut right in front of you in traffic and pumps the breaks, you might spend the whole day thinking about it. Same theory he said.

    He fascinated me that someone would be so deep and somehow right. And in comparison, most of the pua opener try to strike hb's curiosity.
    So maybe I didn't do too bad with her last night as I for once (just by accident) maybe push her anger emotion button!?! Who knows?

    Just wanted to share that with the community and what y'all think about it.
    Nikee --Just did it--


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