Just started talking to a girl ive been in a relationship with in the past. We dated for about a year, things didn't turn out so well towards the end, and we ended up breaking up. We have always contacted each other every other month or so always having a good long conversation then not talking again for a long time.
About 2 years later after having been with her, we've reconnected at a kickback\gathering and tho i was once in love with her i moved on with life and didn't think id ever get back with her if i had anything to do with it. We actually were flirting very hard at the gathering and she actually texted me the same day telling me how strongly she was feeling about me and it depressed her because of how unexpectedly it happened and how she never thought she would ever get with me but is having second thoughts and its confusing her.
Ever since that day we've been talking for about 3 months now consistently, and shes been doing most the pursuing texting\calling me randomly when i expect it least and we've had many very good hangouts lots of flirting\kissing and what not. We are not together but do everything people in a relationship do she doesnt want to commit but also doesnt want to talk to anyone else(she cut off every guy) and does want me talking to anyone else.
Presently, About 2 weeks ago she was really hit hard with life, for
1 her father has been diagnosed with hepatitis c and only has 5-6 months to live.
2 her grandmother is on her deathbed about to die any day now so shes more concerned about how her mother is reacting to it than anything, and
3 shes about to start her program to become an RN and its going to suck up all her time and overall her family is suffering.
On a day we planned to hang out she cancelled on me and couldn't make it happen because of what was going on at her home, i reacted badly because i planned my whole day around it and she felt really bad about canceling but was also surprised by how i acted i didn't talk to her for 2 days. She wanted to give me a minute to stop being mad. So coming back talking she said how much she missed me, alot, and that same day we talked she came on her period. She hasn't been calling texting or initiating much and ive been the one initiating our convos have been much shorter on the phone as well. Just recently i talked to her on the phone, a night ago, she called me out of frustration about some things going on in the household almost crying and i comforted her, then the convo turned to about us.
She knows she loves me. But she says its not that in love feeling. She would like for things to work out but she doesn't know if she will ever fall in love and wants to, she doesn't want to get serious and not be in love first, she feels she should based on how well she knows me and how i treat her. Shes never been in love before and wants it to be me but for some reason doesn't have it yet and doesn't know when or if shell get it.
She does have some walls up for one she has alot of doubts and what ifs, like what if its gonna take a certain person to fully open up emotionally to fall in love or what if it doesn't happen with you ect. ect., also her family doesn't like me and don't want us together so they tell her things like i'm not the one for her "they feel it in there heart"(isn't helping my situation). Also i think the honeymoon phase is over and that isn't helping much either.
How the hell do i handle this. Today i haven't talked to her at all. My current solution is to text her every other day consistently being maintaining a positive frame. I think im falling for her again which definitely isn't helping either at the moment im not telling her that tho.....I need so Professional Advice feel free to ask questions for more clarity.