So I have been on 3 dates with this girl who I have known but not spoken to for a year. We have been facebook friends since the time she was with her ex and finally got to take her out a few weeks ago.
I do really fancy her and we seem to get on ok (from my view anyway). 1st date was a drink in a bar.. 2nd date we went out on a Friday night.. had really good fun. took her bowling, for a bite to eat (casual, nothing fancy) and then onto a club.
She texted me when she got home to thank me for a great night and that we should meet again soon.
We texted during the week and I asked when she was free. She said she wasn't sure but would let me know.
Eventually she texted me and asked if I was free on Sunday to come to her side of town.
Sunday was last Sunday gone. She booked a table at a restaurant and we had lunch - she paid. Nice touch.
We went for a walk after that to a place she loves to walk down and then onto a pub to have a drink.
On all three dates we have been kissing and getting close. She hasn't said anything (emotionally) but was happy to kiss etc..
So we are sitting there and its all going fine. I did mention it was rare for me to go on a 3rd date as I find it hard to find girls I really like.
She asked what I was up to in the week and I made up some stuff to sound busy but that I was free on a certain day.. I then asked when she was free and she hesitated. She then dropped a bit of a bombshell about the 'ex'. I kind of already knew this but she dated some guy for a year and a half and it was the only time she has ever truly been in love. She said she find it hard to get him out of her mind and feels/needs some headspace and that it wasn't fair to meet me when she is thinking of him. He dumped her and she is clearly not over it. I asked if she thought they would date again. She said its dead and buried as far as that is concerned.
They finished 2 months ago.
I told her that's fine.. I tried to come across as laid back as I could about it.. and said things like.. 'no worries.. I don't mind if I don't see you for a couple of weeks... its no problem and there is no pressure'..
I asked her if she had any reservations about me and she didn't really give an answer.. just saying it was the ex. I think she mentioned about it seeming like a heavy conversation but she looked to be bolting so I wanted to find out why. I did say to her.. 'how would you feel if I went on a date with another girl this week'.. her reply was
'Well its fine for people to keep dating until they are really sure they want to be with that person... but if you were shagging around then that would be different'.
She did at one point mention (I think I asked her if she enjoyed hanging out with me) - that she thought I was good fun. On the date she also mentioned I was funny and I have also been a help to her in her work with some solid advice.
A few mins later (and after a true story about how I stole some guys girlfriend who she didn't like) we were back to kissing .. she was stroking my chest etc.. all affectionate and like the conversation never took place.
Half an hour later, and as planned, she had to go and we said goodbye - she didn't say anything about seeing me again but obviously we can always text to meet up again. Incidentally, I know she is on a couple of dating sites and has logged on in the last week although she didn't log on in first two weeks since I first saw her.
Up to now her texts have been infrequent but I have always played it cool by only texting her back 1 text to every 1 text of hers so have not been desperate in that way.
For anyone telling me to plough on and find other girls, sure.. that I will try and do and see what happens.. but I would like to know thoughts on this situation etc..