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  1. #1
    Hawk136 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Has a drunken mistake blown my chances with this girl?

    Hey guys,

    I'll try and keep the back story as short as possible... A couple of months ago I met a girl (one of my friend's, who's a girl, younger sister) at a music festival, very attractive (a solid 8) kissed closed and number closed her. One of my smoothest closes. The next day, she texted me and we've been exchanging texts since. I couldn't meet up with her for about a month however, because I was out of the country for 4 weeks. Still, I thought I'd stay in contact and try to make a move when I got back, and we continued to exchange flirty messages during those 4 weeks.

    When I got back, I went out on a bar crawl before heading to a club with some of my guy friends. The aim of the night was to get stupidly drunk and have a good time with the guys, no intention of sarging or anything. At the night club, I ran into *drum roll* the 8/10 I met at the festival! This is where my memory gets a bit fuzzy... I only remember dancing with this girl (and her telling her friend to go away because we were dancing) and regretfully me telling her I really liked her. Her response was something along the lines of "It would be a bit weird if anything happened between us seeing as though you're my sister's friend"... We've only exchanged a few texts since then, but I noticed her texts were a lot less flirty. My immediate thought once realising this was to freeze her out. So it's been about a week since I last sent her a message or spoke to her.

    My question now is, has this drunken mistake blown any chances I have with this girl? If not, what's my next move to get things back on track? I've never had to freeze someone out before, so I don't really know when "a safe time" to get back in touch with her is and start gaming her again. Under regular circumstances I would probably just move on to the next set, but I see her as potential girlfriend material and don't want to give up.

    Any help or advice would be much appreciated!

    Hawk

  2. #2
    stugots32 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Has a drunken mistake blown my chances with this girl?

    It sounds like at some point you got too forward w her, and you changed the entire dynamic. You need to have some kind of mystery w a female, and telling her you like her the first time you see her after being out of town was a bad move. Freezing her out will not work, unless she's an attention seeking female. If she got less flirty via text, she is probably trying to back away slowly. You could always try asking her out. Otherwise, I'd just use it as a learning experience and move on.

  3. #3
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    Bimmer is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Has a drunken mistake blown my chances with this girl?

    Rough, I can relate to you on this one. Unfortunately, I don't have great news though. I've talked to girls either over text or in person drunk and one time when I was dumb high. Both times disclosing info about how I felt about them that they didn't need to know at the time, & I'm sorry to say that they turned into lessons learned. Once you lay out to them (unintentionally) it's like your cover has been blown.

    You could take the "what do I have to lose?" approach, but I would personally walk from this situation.
    I wish I was little bit taller
    I wish I was a baller
    I wish I had a girl who looked good
    I would call her - Skee Lo, the OG AFC

  4. #4
    easyflow is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Has a drunken mistake blown my chances with this girl?

    Freeze her out until SHE CONTACTS YOU. When she does, get her on the phone. Texting is for friends. When she contacts you again, build some rapport and get an actual phone conversation. Be calm, be confident, don't over think things. Ask her, "When are you free this week?" (Usually weekends are not good for dates, girls have plans with gf's and sh1t). Try to pick a week day, this way, even if you got nothing happening on the weekend, she thinks your a busy popular guy. Tell her your weekend is booked if she asks.

    So ask her "What nights are you free this week?". If she says, "I'm really busy with school, blah, blah, blah", or some other reason, (which may be true). Just say, "Too bad, I know this really amazing place where my friend is hosting an open mic night, the food and drinks and entertainment are always good." Then say, "Get in touch when you have time, my fingers are getting soar from being your pen pal" (as in text buddy).

    Remember if a girl is into you, she will put herself in your orbit. If she doesn't text you on your freeze out, she is not putting herself in your orbit. If you ask her out and she is "busy", she is not putting herself in your orbit. Think about it, if your into a girl, and she asks you out, and even if your working, and studying and have school, I'm sure you and your d1ck will find time to see her. Girls will do the same. It doesn't matter how much "game" someone has, people can't fake attraction. Mother nature handles that part.

    Keep going out, keep meeting people. When you meet another girl, keep the texting and phone calls for setting up night time dates only. text buddy = friend zone.

    Good luck Bro

  5. #5
    Hawk136 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Has a drunken mistake blown my chances with this girl?

    Thanks for the advice! It's rough losing out because of alcohol, but as you all said, it's a learning experience. Easyflow, thanks for the detailed reply on what to do after a freeze out. If she puts herself in my orbit I'll most definitely be using some of that material. If anything positive comes my way with her I'll let you know.


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