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Thread: This is Complicated and Crazy. Answer if you dare

  1. #1
    CaConfused is offline PUA in Training
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    Default This is Complicated and Crazy. Answer if you dare

    OK guys - I'm not sure there's a playbook for this.

    I was friends with a girl for about 3 weeks. Lets call her Lisa . She has a long-distance boyfriend.. We flirt alot, light kissing. She breaks up with her boyfriend. We go a festival with a friend and she tells me that we're going to have sex.

    We get really drunk and I get kinda mad because she sits and talks to a bouncer for 20 minutes without including me. I mention something and she calls me controlling. We chat briefly via facebook and then not at all for 2 weeks.

    Sunday I bump into her with a girl I'm sleeping with and some friends. She gets mad and starts asking if I'm into her, and also starts sh1t talking my friend. We all hang as a group and eventually get split up.

    Hours later I get a call from her "IM drunk and need a ride home". My hookup girl and I walk over and hang with her for a bit. Whenever Im away from hookup girl Lisa tries to make out with me, puts her hands down my pants, etc. I push it all away.

    She ends up calling hookup a girl a bitch, I tell her that's enough and put her in a cab. Lisa is hot, but not mega hot. On the way home she texts "You miss me"

    Lisa texted me on Monday saying "Hope you had fun banging your girlfriend." I tell her "you know shes not my girlfriend" and now we're having small talk over texts, although she's stopped.

    What should I do next? First this girl isn;t talking to me, then she's trying to have sex with me at a bar. WTF!

  2. #2
    Bballking is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: This is Complicated and Crazy. Answer if you dare

    Logistics, first off, well done. Had your constant fark with ya, so good idea not to play into Lisa's hands and go for the BJ, can't say I would do the same. Scratch the drunk night. Sh1t happens, she had been drinking, and nothing was going to work out for ya, unless you dropped off homegirl and went back to Lisa. Little shady, and could cause future problems should homegirl find out.

    Your first mistake was waiting around while she talked to the bouncer. Your second mistake was getting mad about it. And your third mistake was letting her know.

    If you've ever read the game, Neil Strauss, Style, is talking to a girl early on in his pick up career. She's a party girl and starts flirting with a guy outside the bar after her and Style had walked out together. Neil waits around while she flirts with the guy for ten minutes or so. He then tries to talk to her, may get her number, and then the interaction is dead. He learned his lesson, now it's your turn. Don't wait around while she talks, go talk to someone else, even if it is the old guy drinking by himself at the bar.

    Besides that, your fine, don't sweat it, the girl wants you. And her jealousy shines through her "hope you had fun with your gf text." Don't beta out here, but relieve some tension and show mild interest. As she starts to reciprocate increase your intent until you meet up and smang her brains out.

  3. #3
    CaConfused is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: This is Complicated and Crazy. Answer if you dare

    Hmm wish I read your reply earlier

    Here's the update. My strategy here was to not apologize and to just play it cool.
    How did I do? I feel weak in the Thursday thing. Thanks so much for your guidance

    I asked her out for Thursday. She replied
    Maybe Thursday. I take it your overly possessive girlfriend left? 😱

    I said:You like me

    She said:Not anymore. Drunk u is a bit too much for me.I'm just teasing you.I think it's amusing how possessive she was, and the fact that everyone except u noticed it. Then again, ignorance is bliss

    I saidI am amazed you are saying drunk me is too much after After Sunday i figured ok I had a funny drunk night and so did you. Call it even

    She said:Fair. Still trying to stay away from that personally

    I said: Trying to give us both mulligans, and have dinner without 198 hours of drinking.

    She saidLet's just call even and friends?

    I said: Absolutely

    She said: Great! I'll let u know about Thursday. Between dancing and Pilates I can barely move

  4. #4
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    Default Re: This is Complicated and Crazy. Answer if you dare

    Honestly, this girl sounds like trouble. Just remember to stay in an alpha mindset. Understand that she is looking for validation in most of the things she is saying, and you are giving it to her. Don't go on the defensive. Like when she says things "Hope you had fun banging your girlfriend" don't defend yourself, just own it. You saying, "you know shes not my girlfriend" is exactly what she wants to hear, because she wants to know you are still invested in her. It's better to say things that keep her wondering if she has a shot.
    When she says "Drunk u is a bit too much for me." You should have said something like, "haha well it's too bad you can't handle me. Don't worry though, we can just be friends." That way you could have stole her frame, obviously it's too late for that, but you can still learn from it. Bottom line, don't take her so seriously.

  5. #5
    CaConfused is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: This is Complicated and Crazy. Answer if you dare

    Awesome advice.

    So we are tentative for Thursday.

    Do you have any idea how to steal the frame back?

  6. #6
    TheGeneral's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is Complicated and Crazy. Answer if you dare

    I would cancel on her and go out to the bar with my friends. And like I said before, don't take her so seriously.

  7. #7
    Bballking is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: This is Complicated and Crazy. Answer if you dare

    She said: Not anymore...

    She liked you, and still likes you. Girls don't give up that easy. They are bombarded with guys asking them out. They have the power to weed through the crap and pick out which one they like. She won't let that go as quickly as you may.

    Being alpha is complicated. The idea gets skewed quickly and generally forces guys to fit into a tough guy frame that most people are more intimated by than open too. You ever seen that kid with a backwards hat on, chain around his neck, trying to swag, and holding a stern look on his face. His trying to be alpha. Most people will see this, and if they're not intimated, they'll be put off and think "he doesn't look like he'd be easy to talk to, I'll just avoid him." A truly alpha male in a social society would be one that holds true charisma. You can charm, laugh, smile, joke, talk to almost anyone, compliment, and when the time is right, assert. In order to lead, you must be willing to be lead.

    Don't worry about stealing the frame. Your frame is fine. Your text exchange, although slightly argumentative, showed you were willing to stand up for yourself, that's alpha enough. If you actually want to go out this girl tomorrow, you gotta loosen things up. Text her tonight. Banter and joke. "It's ironic dancing and pilates can make you not want to move, cuz this bed is doin it enough for me right now " If she mentions anything about your bed, by all means run with it, great way to increase the sexual tension. Otherwise, push/pull a little tonight with some texts. Don't mention your meeting tomorrow, and then don't text tomorrow. If she texts you, awesome. If not, throw one out late and just ask what she's up to, again don't mention your meeting. If you must steal the frame, this would be the way to do it.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: This is Complicated and Crazy. Answer if you dare

    I agree that she sounds like trouble and is seeking massive validation for her insecurities. Just work on the logistics so that you can sleep with her and ignore the rest of the things she says.
    Hit me up if you're thinking about coming to Vegas. It's the Best City for Game in the World.


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