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Thread: She sent me this... Help?

  1. #11
    D1v1ou$$'s Avatar
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    Default Re: She sent me this... Help?

    Many may disagree, but I feel like it was a sh1t test, there had to have been some IOI or something missed throughout the night that made her feel you werent up to the task at allowing her to forget ole boy. I say this because its happened to me before, just as Xmrider said, ignore that friend zone crap, typically what Negs are for. I truly believe at times we are put in this situation to test our reaction, resolve, I think you gamed her enough for an F-close, simply because of the situation. Do we not think women have field reports? Yo, had you f-closed that not only did you have the potential to become the D**k in the glass box, you gave her that validation she sought when she was at an impasse when considering you as just a friend or the guy there at the right time, I mean why else would she kiss you and blast you on twitter? Keep pushing man, you did the right thing, but these situations yield a more analytical approach in my opinion
    You can't miss something you've never had, but I can be sure she will regret her opportunity...

    Better known as Debauchivalrious...

  2. #12
    easyflow is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: She sent me this... Help?

    Disclaimer. I only read your original post, and am giving my thoughts on that.

    It's totally valid Bro. It takes time to get over someone you were really into. Look at it this way. You dodged a bullet. if you became rebound guy, and this girl was still hot for her ex. Guess who is getting stood up, lied to, fucked around on. YOU. Every time the ex calls, she will choose him over you.

    If you wanna leave the door open. In hindsight you could have said "No problem, I know it takes time. Give me a call when your ready to have some fun."

    You can still open the door. Drop her a playful text. Then drop the "Hey when your feeling more like your usual self, drop me a line."

    Then leave it. Go meet new people.

  3. #13
    testin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: She sent me this... Help?

    Quote Originally Posted by D1v1ou$$ View Post
    Many may disagree, but I feel like it was a sh1t test, there had to have been some IOI or something missed throughout the night that made her feel you werent up to the task at allowing her to forget ole boy. I say this because its happened to me before, just as Xmrider said, ignore that friend zone crap, typically what Negs are for. I truly believe at times we are put in this situation to test our reaction, resolve, I think you gamed her enough for an F-close, simply because of the situation. Do we not think women have field reports? Yo, had you f-closed that not only did you have the potential to become the D**k in the glass box, you gave her that validation she sought when she was at an impasse when considering you as just a friend or the guy there at the right time, I mean why else would she kiss you and blast you on twitter? Keep pushing man, you did the right thing, but these situations yield a more analytical approach in my opinion
    I like reading that, I like the "try/push" approach way more than the "move on" approach...

    But...why would she throw all that at me then? What was she expecting me to do? Fight for her? Cry about it? All that would just lower my value and make me feel like a chump

    There could be a lot of reasons honestly... I just can't pin point what, one of the reasons why I think her friend said something bad about me is how her attitude just switched on me... Last thing I know she kissed me good night, then couple days later she throws me the "this wont work out" line... Maybe she just wasn't feeling me and that kiss was just a goodbye kiss? I really don't know because that was the exact opposite of "not leading me on"

    Bottom line is she isn't ready to let go of the ex, I don't know if she still talks to him or what but obviously that night brought out some bad feelings about him and it went against me...

    I feel the best thing I can do is just wait it out then try again... Maybe she does need the space to realize shit ain't gonna work out with the ex or that she can mentally get past all of that. I mean seeing her write that she had feelings for her ex on twitter was a red flag i ignored, i thought i could make her forget about her ex like how girls i date make me forget about the last girl...

  4. #14
    testin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: She sent me this... Help?

    Quote Originally Posted by easyflow View Post
    Disclaimer. I only read your original post, and am giving my thoughts on that.

    It's totally valid Bro. It takes time to get over someone you were really into. Look at it this way. You dodged a bullet. if you became rebound guy, and this girl was still hot for her ex. Guess who is getting stood up, lied to, farked around on. YOU. Every time the ex calls, she will choose him over you.

    If you wanna leave the door open. In hindsight you could have said "No problem, I know it takes time. Give me a call when your ready to have some fun."

    You can still open the door. Drop her a playful text. Then drop the "Hey when your feeling more like your usual self, drop me a line."

    Then leave it. Go meet new people.
    I know I dodged a bullet, and this girl had enough respect for me to warn me about it... I don't think she isn't still interested in me, i just think she would always take the ex over me, at least for now and didnt want to put me through that... pretty selfless move but that is the type of girl i know she was, she is too much of a nice girl.. thats what probably got her so stuck on her ex...

    Yeah, that was a better line... I guess I can just send a text in a couple of weeks to say hi then throw the "hit me up when you're feeling like yourself" line, just to let her know im not resenting her and willing to try again when she gets her sh1t together...

    that isnt a bad thing right? or does that show im no challenge?

  5. #15
    easyflow is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: She sent me this... Help?

    I think you should "throw her a pass" in the next while, and if she wants to "catch it, and throw one back" - as in text. Go for it.

    As I re-read the line "hit me up when you're feeling like yourself". Probably not the strongest game. Do some text game research. There is tonnes online and on this forum. Keep it light, flirty, don't bring up her past relationship. Don't become text buddy=friend zone. Text to build a comfort, but me cheeky, don't always respond, eventually work up to a phone call, and ask her out for a date, with a time and place.

    Then take her out and have fun. If she is still into her ex, just keep your emotions out of it, cuz she will still try and make it work with him.

    Also, look up some "BF destroyers". Don't talk negative about the guy.

    Good luck Bro.

  6. #16
    testin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: She sent me this... Help?

    Quote Originally Posted by easyflow View Post
    I think you should "throw her a pass" in the next while, and if she wants to "catch it, and throw one back" - as in text. Go for it.

    As I re-read the line "hit me up when you're feeling like yourself". Probably not the strongest game. Do some text game research. There is tonnes online and on this forum. Keep it light, flirty, don't bring up her past relationship. Don't become text buddy=friend zone. Text to build a comfort, but me cheeky, don't always respond, eventually work up to a phone call, and ask her out for a date, with a time and place.

    Then take her out and have fun. If she is still into her ex, just keep your emotions out of it, cuz she will still try and make it work with him.

    Also, look up some "BF destroyers". Don't talk negative about the guy.

    Good luck Bro.
    Sorry I didn't mean that as my actual line to send to her... I'll post my next text to her here before I send it just to have the right mindset...

    So which path should I take? Back off for couple weeks and see if she hits me up? If not do I go straight to try setting up a date again or just drop the hit me up when you change your mind approach?

    Also I know the BF destroyer techniques but does it work on ex boyfriends? Isn't bringing it up a bad idea? Or do I just bring it up on the date?

  7. #17
    testin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: She sent me this... Help?

    Just an update...

    She still hasn't contact me, and I haven't bothered either. So it's been over 3 months of NC... I have other options, and one of those girls blows this one out the water...
    I saw her twitter recently and she mentioned being on a bad date so i know she is dating again... she also daily posts things about how she sees all her friends in cute relationships and doesnt know whats wrong with her... also some tweets, possibly about the ex... so this girl definitely got some low self esteem and seems a little desperate...
    She has liked a couple of my photos on instagram recently when she went months without liking anything... just want your guys opinion on what i should do?
    i dont think she will initiate but seems like she is close to doing so if ever... i hate to be the one to initiate because im the one that got "rejected" but it did end on a good note...

    i know she still has shit to deal with but dating multiple women will only help me be in the more "i dont give a fark" mode so itll help me with all the girls, especially the one im really interested in... thoughts?

  8. #18
    Learning The Ropes is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: She sent me this... Help?

    Mate, leave her the fark alone. She is bad news and she will end up messing with your head again, whether intentionally or not.

    You're making out you could game her as you have other girls on the go but the fact you are posting on here after 3 months of NC tells me you still have too much invested in her. And I can't help wondering how you saw her twitter. Remember, NC means NO CONTACT - that includes social media as well as phoning and texting bro.

    Keep sucking up the pain and moving forward.

    She might put out feelers to see if you are still interested (liking stuff you post for example) but don't go there.

    If she wants you back, it is up to her to do the running.

    For now, ignore her, focus on other hotter girls and don't look at her on any social media sites, it just holds you back.

    Sorry if this sounds blunt but I've been there and it isn't worth it.

    Peace bro.

  9. #19
    testin is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: She sent me this... Help?

    Quote Originally Posted by Learning The Ropes View Post
    Mate, leave her the fark alone. She is bad news and she will end up messing with your head again, whether intentionally or not.

    You're making out you could game her as you have other girls on the go but the fact you are posting on here after 3 months of NC tells me you still have too much invested in her. And I can't help wondering how you saw her twitter. Remember, NC means NO CONTACT - that includes social media as well as phoning and texting bro.

    Keep sucking up the pain and moving forward.

    She might put out feelers to see if you are still interested (liking stuff you post for example) but don't go there.

    If she wants you back, it is up to her to do the running.

    For now, ignore her, focus on other hotter girls and don't look at her on any social media sites, it just holds you back.

    Sorry if this sounds blunt but I've been there and it isn't worth it.

    Peace bro.
    No worries, thanks for the reply. I just got curious so checked up on her twitter, thats all. I really don't have much emotional attachment anymore, I am at a place where I can move on no problem. I don't need her.

    And honestly, I wouldn't have taken her all that serious this time. She was my only option back then, now I got a good rotation of girls. I just wanted more options so I feel less needy with the girls I have most interest in.


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