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  1. #1
    Wolf24's Avatar
    Wolf24 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Mindset and Motivation for Studying

    Hi guys. The thread title might be misleading, but frankly, you are right with your assumption. Right now my (only) biggest problem in life is to study.

    I'm a college sophomore with great life, amazing friends and a gorgeous gf. However, my academic career sucks. It was more of the same when I was still a chump and I still seem to be unable to fix it.

    I've tried every possible way that comes to mind. I forced myself to study, asked help from my family, friends and teachers. But I just can't concentrate while studying at home/library or while listening to a lecture in class.

    I usually can't study for my exams as much as I wish for. Although on occasion I convince myself that I studied enough and that I'm ready to nail those papers, the results tell a different story.

    The reasons why I don't/can't study:
    - Most classes feel too hard to even study. (I'm in computer engineering/science)
    - I don't use my time well. I just play video games or sleep my ass off when I get home.
    - I compare myself with people and usually whine about how they can pull it off so easy, so I don't belong in study groups.
    - I can find countless excuses to delay/escape studying.
    - Basically I'm a girl on her period (no disrespect) when it comes to studying.
    - I don't have a concrete source for motivation.
    - I don't really believe that I can be successful.

    My potential source for motivation might be money. But I can't see how my thrive for money or getting a good job can motivate me for my next exam, you know? One exam feels like too much of a small piece in a huge puzzle.

    So, I'm in need of any kind of advice. Feel free to shoot...
    It's not about who I was or who I'm going to become.

    It's about who I am. Do it right here, right now.

  2. #2
    TheDuke's Avatar
    TheDuke is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Mindset and Motivation for Studying

    Sounds like you may be suffering from ADHD or some other learning disability. Go talk to the counselors at your school's resource office and have them run some tests. If that option isn't available, then go speak with your family doctor. Don't be ashamed to seek out this help. If this is your problem, then there are likely medications, study methods, and/or accommodations available to help you overcome your difficulties.
    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

  3. #3
    Bimmer's Avatar
    Bimmer is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Mindset and Motivation for Studying

    I laughed when I read The Duke's first line because I was thinking the same thing. I have ADHD and school studies were always a struggle. I only had two options, 1. Take a pill that would help me focus, but suppress my appetite. 2. Continue to struggle. or 3. Keep searching for an alternative route (which I could never find).
    I wish I was little bit taller
    I wish I was a baller
    I wish I had a girl who looked good
    I would call her - Skee Lo, the OG AFC

  4. #4
    Vere is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Mindset and Motivation for Studying

    I can feel you bro..I study chemical engineering and at some point i felt like what you are feeling now..I procrastinated and never got anything done..so i know what is like to be like you

    So lets start with your first set of problems

    "Most classes feel too hard to even study. (I'm in computer engineering/science)"

    "I compare myself with people and usually whine about how they can pull it off so easy, so I don't belong in study groups."

    I am studying engineering too and I know what it is like to study it. So basically what I did to overcome it's difficulty was to look out for people that were already passing the modules I was doing successfully (don't try to re-invent the wheel). So I had an Interview style type of questions prepared for this guys. Amongst my list of questions was " How do you cope with this module?" ,"Do you have any study methods that you recommended?","Do you have an example of time management program that you recommend?" etc..I Asked them this questions with a hope that if they can study well, perhaps I can because after all we are human..we share the same neurology. I was impressed with the level of feedback I got from this guys and this strategy proved effective for me. One more thing, don't compare yourself to other people because you will set your limitations based on other people..You can do better than them..remember you don't have to compete with them, rather advice you to co-operate with them..another thing to bear in mind is "No man is an Island of himself" meaning you can never amount to anything great without bring other people up with you..That is one of the chief fundamentals of success

    Your second set of problems

    "I don't use my time well. I just play video games or sleep my ass off when I get home."

    "Basically I'm a girl on her period (no disrespect) when it comes to studying".

    "I don't have a concrete source for motivation."

    "I can find countless excuses to delay/escape studying."

    I remember that I used to play Need For Speed Most Wanted almost everyday and will sometimes retire late in the night..I Became so addicted to it that I forgot that I was here to study not be a game freak..This happened because I realised that my academic life sucked and playing this game helped me ease off this negative emotions..Since emotions are addictive..I played games to have fun and pass time..I was some kind of a nerd..I came out of this rut hole the by time I started to ask myself questions..not just questions but some serious questions..I needed to find motivation for me to study this ass kicking course..so I started to search the web and came across the article that talked about two types of motivation in life..There is the "away from motivation" and the "towards motivation"...The away from motivation basically has to do with you running away from life's problems to survive for e.g studying because you want to end poverty circle in your family..and..The towards motivation has to do with you pursuing success and fighting for recognition in society..this motivation is better than the former because when you use the away from motivation..the moment you start finding money, its over and you will run out of fuel if you get what you want..so your motivation should be more than money..Your motivation should be passion..that desire to contribute something to the society..use that kind of motivation and you will never run out of steam ..One more strategy that I recommend is to use affirmations...Affir mations( if you are not familiar with them) are the sentences or string of words that you repeat to yourself daily to replace or format limiting beliefs that are holding you back. The theory behind why they work can be found all over the web..I am not going to get into that here or I will never finish hahaha ..so basically what you do with affirmations is you write sentences in present tense in your scrap book and repeat them daily.. this will reprogram your subconscious mind and replace your limiting belief e.g if your limiting belief has to do with you passing your modules..you can repeat this daily affirmation to replace it "I am so happy and grateful now that I pass all my modules exceptionally well"

    I hope this helps bro...cheers
    Whether you think you can or you can't either way, you are right-To believe in the heroic makes heroes

  5. #5
    Wolf24's Avatar
    Wolf24 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Mindset and Motivation for Studying

    Quote Originally Posted by TheDuke View Post
    Sounds like you may be suffering from ADHD or some other learning disability.
    Yes as much as I don't want to accept this, it might be the reason why. I'll have some tests done.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bimmer View Post
    1. Take a pill that would help me focus, but suppress my appetite. 2. Continue to struggle.
    Which path did you take? How did you decide? If you chose to struggle, how did you overcome it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Vere View Post
    The towards motivation has to do with you pursuing success and fighting for recognition in society..this motivation is better than the former because when you use the away from motivation..the moment you start finding money, its over and you will run out of fuel if you get what you want..so your motivation should be more than money..Your motivation should be passion..that desire to contribute something to the society..use that kind of motivation and you will never run out of steam
    I kinda fail to see how passing a course can help me contribute to society. Isn't it such a long term goal? Other than that, I agree with talking to other people and using affirmations. I'll try them.

    ...

    Sorry if I'm being a sort of a knucklehead by asking these questions guys. I just want as many as different and detailed perspectives before I dig in.
    It's not about who I was or who I'm going to become.

    It's about who I am. Do it right here, right now.

  6. #6
    Bimmer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mindset and Motivation for Studying

    I tried pills, but like I said, you're never hungry. I started to lose a lot of weight, so I stopped taking them. Honestly, I schmoozed my way through classes haha. I'm not the best at working through a word problem, but working a room? I can handle that just fine.
    I wish I was little bit taller
    I wish I was a baller
    I wish I had a girl who looked good
    I would call her - Skee Lo, the OG AFC


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