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  • 1 Post By cdharders

Thread: Brother-Zoned

  1. #1
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    Unhappy Brother-Zoned

    I met her in the first week of college after finding out that we both have classes together every day. We texted a lot and she would send smileys like ))))))))))))) (super excessive), and we had a 2hour conversation on the phone one night while she was drinking at a party; she even called me back after we got disconnected. One night while I was at my brother's house and she was out partying, we were texting and I convinced her to hang out with me that night. We went to the beach, talked, and I got rejected twice for a kiss ([i think] because she has a boyfriend), but we both laughed it off and kept the conversation going.

    After that night, things between us were very mutual and I could tell that the attraction dwindled over time. We've been friends for about 3 months now and we're really close. Today we talked for an hour about her wanting to break up with her boyfriend (long-distance relationship) because she met this guy here and slept over his house. Everything I heard about this guy from her seals the deal - she really wants him and is willing to break up with her boyfriend for him.

    What sucks is that I'm seen more as a brother for her - and another girl we hang out with (Three's Company) - and she know's all about me and Game and I'm a player to her because I talk about women to them (which I thought was fine since they both had boyfriends-and they found it very interesting "chick crack"). By the way: I'm talking to this amazing girl who is also long-distance and fulfills everything that I'm looking for in a woman (except that she's not here).

    "we can't have it all" I know, but I feel like this was horrible timing - for me - and great timing for the other guy. This girl doesn't know that I like her though, but I would have thought that she'd think about me more than anyone else if she was ever single again.
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  2. #2
    cdharders's Avatar
    cdharders is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Brother-Zoned

    Is there advice you're looking for? Seems like you figured it all out. Things can almost only get worse after initially meeting the girl attraction-wise. Talking about the boyfriend or other girls isn't helpful. Better to use them as wings and pre-selection at this point.

  3. #3
    SmoothFLow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Brother-Zoned

    I guess I know what I could (should) do, which is just continue being a good friend to her without expecting anything, but I find it hard to do that because [i think] that we shared a time of attraction but it didnt work out because she had a boyfriend, but now that shes breaking up with him I expected that she would come to me for comfort instead of some new guy she just met. Like.... I could have been that guy if the timing was right - I got jacked.

    I kinda made things worse by telling her that we won't hang out anymore because she will be with him instead.
    I have been thinking about distancing myself from both of the girls, but you put it in a great perspective and if I can change my perception a bit then I think I could get over it.
    Success or fail; everything you try can be chalked up as a learning experience~


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