Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 10 of 10
Like Tree2Likes
  • 1 Post By jinko
  • 1 Post By NerdyPrince

Thread: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

  1. #1
    jinko is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 64, Level: 1
    Level completed: 28%, Points required for next Level: 36
    Overall activity: 35.3%
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    12
    Points
    64
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    8

    Default Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    1st semester of college almost done and i lost oppurtunities with so many girls. I know im attractive but im incredibly shy. I usually crush on girls i see around alot then once i think alot and get shy. . Should i go to the mall one day and just try to approach random girls. Any advice. Ive never been in a relationship cause of my anxiety.Im on reak stuck at home and was thinking if i flirt with randoms ill be a little better to talk to girls im interested in when break ends.

  2. #2
    jinko is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 64, Level: 1
    Level completed: 28%, Points required for next Level: 36
    Overall activity: 35.3%
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    12
    Points
    64
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    8

    Default Re: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    Basically a girl can be interested in me for months and i wont do anything cause of it. Then she gets mad looses interest and moves on. I need help on my anxiety.

  3. #3
    NerdyPrince's Avatar
    NerdyPrince is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 59, Level: 1
    Level completed: 18%, Points required for next Level: 41
    Overall activity: 12.2%
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Vestsjślland, Denmark
    Posts
    6
    Points
    59
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    Hey Jinko!

    approach anxiety is not easy, but there are effective ways to get rid of it, one of with Sasha Daygame shows in one of his videos.
    Search: Miracles in Belgrade on Youtube


    Hell, he even made an app where he will give you some mission to get rid of that approach anxiety.

    Anyways i hope this might help you abit :-)
    How Awesome Life Just Had Become!

  4. #4
    Bballking is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 1,728, Level: 24
    Level completed: 28%, Points required for next Level: 72
    Overall activity: 80.0%
    Achievements:
    1000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    301
    Points
    1,728
    Level
    24
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    Rep Power
    87

    Default Re: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    You got the right idea bro. AA is a son of a bi***, but the only real way to get rid of it is to approach and engage. I've cold approached my fair share of girls but the pounding in my chest never seems to be eliminated, merely decreased, and sometimes I still can't bring myself to do it without a push from a nearby friend.

    Luckily your still in school... and your just in your first semester so you got plenty of time to hit your prime in your junior and senior years (yeah, it may take that long). You don't necessarily need to dive right in to cold approaching girls at the mall or in the quad. Being as shy as you are, start simply by making it a goal of yours to say "hi" or "how are you" to one person you walk past each day. Don't forget to smile! Also, engage the person behind the counter at the grocery store or gas station. Be the first to say "how you doing?" when you walk up to the register.

    Take a public speaking class as well. If your shy you probably have a difficult time giving speeches. But as public speaking is the number one fear amongst people, death coming in second, if you can conquer it you'll be leaps and bounds along your journey to confidence. Talk to the professor before the class starts and explain how much it terrifies you. They'll be willing to help.

    An added note: should you feel the need to approach, it will be easier to go indirect. But if you want to make advances as quickly as possible, going direct would be the way to go. Pick your poison!

  5. #5
    jinko is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 64, Level: 1
    Level completed: 28%, Points required for next Level: 36
    Overall activity: 35.3%
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    12
    Points
    64
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    8

    Default Re: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    Ya ill start on that but i have lots of options but im just to shy. Ive waited like 2 weeks with girl 2 and 2 months with girl 1. I cant tell if girl 1 was trying to get me jealous with a dude or what earlier this week. I think shes talking to someone else. I was somewhere off my schedule andws walking behind her. She sped walked towards the guy and they hugged and talked for a bit. I dont know whats up but this cycle has happend like 8 times before and im tired of feeling regret. I think she whispered did he see me but whatever im sick of that feeling. I just want action. Saw the 1st girl i liked aboit to hook up with some dude and the 2nd was what i just wrote. Regret hurts more then failure.

    I have 6 options really interested in 2. The one hugging dude and another that after i checked her out once she started hanging out where i live at more often. I think shes older. Help on what to do.

  6. #6
    jinko is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 64, Level: 1
    Level completed: 28%, Points required for next Level: 36
    Overall activity: 35.3%
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    12
    Points
    64
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    8

    Default Re: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bballking View Post
    You got the right idea bro. AA is a son of a bi***, but the only real way to get rid of it is to approach and engage. I've cold approached my fair share of girls but the pounding in my chest never seems to be eliminated, merely decreased, and sometimes I still can't bring myself to do it without a push from a nearby friend.

    Luckily your still in school... and your just in your first semester so you got plenty of time to hit your prime in your junior and senior years (yeah, it may take that long). You don't necessarily need to dive right in to cold approaching girls at the mall or in the quad. Being as shy as you are, start simply by making it a goal of yours to say "hi" or "how are you" to one person you walk past each day. Don't forget to smile! Also, engage the person behind the counter at the grocery store or gas station. Be the first to say "how you doing?" when you walk up to the register.

    Take a public speaking class as well. If your shy you probably have a difficult time giving speeches. But as public speaking is the number one fear amongst people, death coming in second, if you can conquer it you'll be leaps and bounds along your journey to confidence. Talk to the professor before the class starts and explain how much it terrifies you. They'll be willing to help.

    An added note: should you feel the need to approach, it will be easier to go indirect. But if you want to make advances as quickly as possible, going direct would be the way to go. Pick your poison!
    Didnt realize i could qoute on my phone

  7. #7
    Bballking is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 1,728, Level: 24
    Level completed: 28%, Points required for next Level: 72
    Overall activity: 80.0%
    Achievements:
    1000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    301
    Points
    1,728
    Level
    24
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
    Rep Power
    87

    Default Re: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    You got 6 options and your only interested in 2, so you have 4 girls to work with to figure out what passes as solid game and what doesn't. Use them as your canvas. Ultimately, your goal should be to build confidence and pull yourself away from your shyness. The things I mentioned above, however small they seem, are going to help you eventually.

    There is no magic change to get rid of anxiety or shyness. It takes time and persistence. Just like working out at the gym, you can't slide under the bench bar with 2 bricks on the side if you never lifted a day in your life. Your going to have to start small and figure out proper form. There is a pain period. Its physical when lifting weights, its psychological when forming social skills, which can seem more painful. But eventually you'll find out your image to strangers, or girls for that matter, doesn't mean as much to them as you think it does.

    So I'd say try what you can with the other 4 options. Do what feels natural, regardless of how AFC like you think it is. You gotta start somewhere, and than you can dial in. And you may be surprised at what you get.

  8. #8
    afflixion is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 201, Level: 4
    Level completed: 2%, Points required for next Level: 49
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered100 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    22
    Points
    201
    Level
    4
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    13

    Default Re: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    As others have said, you need to start small. Small steps. If you jump right in to approaching random girls at a mall you probably won't get a positive result (overall) and that will just feed into your anxiety and make you feel even worse. Maybe start with something simple like just smiling and saying hello - without any attempt to lead into a conversation - and once you're comfortable doing that then work up from there?

    Try not to over-think things (I know, easier said than done) and also try not to predict the future or read minds! And remember - the girls you get crushes on are just people, like you. They aren't gods. Some of them, if you got to know them, you wouldn't even like.

  9. #9
    jinko is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 64, Level: 1
    Level completed: 28%, Points required for next Level: 36
    Overall activity: 35.3%
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    12
    Points
    64
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    8

    Default Re: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    Quote Originally Posted by afflixion View Post
    As others have said, you need to start small. Small steps. If you jump right in to approaching random girls at a mall you probably won't get a positive result (overall) and that will just feed into your anxiety and make you feel even worse. Maybe start with something simple like just smiling and saying hello - without any attempt to lead into a conversation - and once you're comfortable doing that then work up from there?

    Try not to over-think things (I know, easier said than done) and also try not to predict the future or read minds! And remember - the girls you get crushes on are just people, like you. They aren't gods. Some of them, if you got to know them, you wouldn't even like.
    Ya i think ive been taking small steps all year. I have more friends and for the first time female friends. I go out more and everything. I dont feel as shy but when it comes to seeing a girl i like say eating with friends or by herself i freeze. I know what you mean though one girl i talked to and she reminded me of another girl years back. We almost went out but i latter learned she was a female pua and a player just like this girl i learned was.. I avoided her because she reminded me so much of her from our few minute convos that she approached me with. I learned a friend of mine knows one of the girls so i was going to have him like sit with her or sit with her then i come in. Ill feel more comfortable then.

  10. #10
    NerdyPrince's Avatar
    NerdyPrince is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 59, Level: 1
    Level completed: 18%, Points required for next Level: 41
    Overall activity: 12.2%
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Vestsjślland, Denmark
    Posts
    6
    Points
    59
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    0

    Default Re: Approaching random girls. Severe approach anxiety.

    The most simple thing such as asking for the time can also really boost your confidence ;-)
    How Awesome Life Just Had Become!


Similar Threads

  1. How Can I Overcome Severe Approach Anxiety
    By blackflash234 in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 5
    Last Thread: 07-05-2013, 01:02 AM
  2. approaching random girl at coffee shop?
    By Rando9009 in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 12
    Last Thread: 03-21-2013, 06:21 AM
  3. Do you have Approach Anxiety?
    By The Elitist in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 2
    Last Thread: 01-07-2013, 11:17 PM
  4. My first night approaching random women...
    By ElLinguista in forum Field Reports
    Replies: 0
    Last Thread: 07-15-2012, 12:30 PM
  5. what to say when you approach a random girl 1st time
    By snuty in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 2
    Last Thread: 03-08-2012, 04:46 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com