Alright, I've messed up bad. I'm new to all of this and this relationship spans many years from before I'd even heard of any of this. I've been married for 7 years and with my wife for 9. That marriage is now over. During this time, I've had a sort of relationship with a beautiful girl who has usually chased me. We did sleep together a few times 2 years back, but I stopped doing that because I felt guilty for cheating. I have since learned that she wanted me to leave my wife and enter into a serious relationship with her. I didn't and she is now somewhat bitter. The bitterness hasn't shown itself until just now when we started talking about what could have been, as we have remained flirty and even touchy-feely on occasion I just haven't let it progress beyond that because I didn't want to break up my marriage, mostly because of our children. (My wife doesn't seem to have that problem)
This woman is much younger than I. I'm 30 she's 22. She started chasing me when she was 16. I'm sure she is a justifier/idealist. And pretty sure she is a tester. I'm wondering about the tester aspect though, as I know her and her circle of friends pretty well, (we're co workers in fast food. our co workers are pretty much our world) and she never seems to have more than one person she's interested in, with the possible exception of me, although I can always tell when she's in a new relationship (if i don't have first hand knowledge) because for the first few months she is a lot more distant. She really seems to fit the social butterfly archetype, I know the best way to get her attention is to ignore her for awhile and I've done that in the past, well before I heard anything about pua.
She also identifies herself as a lesbian. I have first hand knowledge that this is not entirely accurate, but she is currently dating (and living with) another woman who takes decent care of her financially.
After my initial breakup with my wife, she wanted me to sleep with her again, but I didn't make a move because at the time I was feeling dumped and trying everything I could think of to get right with my wife. So she cheated on her girlfriend with another girl at work and from what she says is now trying to really get serious and make things work with her girlfriend. However, in contrast to this, she still likes to show me naked pics and video of herself.
But she won't actually send them to me anymore. just shows me on her phone.
I think its perfectly plausible that I've shown too much interest in her lately, and just the other day I made her angry with me at a party were we were both pretty sloshed (her girlfriend was there too) by not denying our sexual past to a co worker that asked about the rumors. I thought I smoothed that over with her. And she even said that she could never stay mad at me, but she has since been ignoring me. (about 3 days now) I have decided to ignore her as well, since in the past it has driven her crazy, but I'm wondering if there's anything else I could do to reignite her interest. There are a few other girls that I could easily sleep with, but they are far less desirable (at least to me. she has pretty much always been the pinnacle of sexual desire for me) I'm wondering If I should start dating them casually? or would this put her off even more? I let this girl slip through fingers twice already and if there's a way to keep this from happening a third time, I'd really appreciate the knowledge.