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View Poll Results: Shall I still pursue her?

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  • Yes

    1 50.00%
  • No

    1 50.00%
Results 1 to 6 of 6
  1. #1
    biots is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Coworker put me in a friend zone

    Long story short: I got hired at a company in July of 2013. I found out this week that one of the hot women working there was quitting so went to her desk and asked her out. She said she has a boyfriend and is also moving away from the city at the end of the year. I told her I hope it works out with him and still gave her my number. Next day I called in sick and she thought I called sick because I was embarrassed so did not show up for work. I told her I was really sick.

    Yesterday we had our annual office party, where I again started to hit on her. As she was leaving, I went to her and said "Have lunch with me". She asked "why?" I said "It is just lunch" to which she said "okay".

    An hour later she texted me this : "Persistent? Puttin me on the spot as I walk out, eh?..Im fine w lunch..as friends.Hope thats ok with you, otherwise not a good idea."

    Me: "What can I say the 'unknown' as its own appeal. If I wanted something straightforward and planned out, id join a book club. Friends..why not? after all you have to start somewhere.

    She: "Start somewhere? (My name), this probably isn't a good idea. Lets do a group lunch instead.

    Me: "I looooooove Lunches, I mean group Lunches"

    She: "hahahahaha ok. We are golden"

    She has already put me in the friend zone and she is leaving in 3 weeks. I am hoping to change this within the 3 weeks, although my situation looks pretty grim.

    Any advice as to what I should say to her at the office when I see her again? Or.. shall I just completely ignore that I asked her out and treat her as a coworker (no flirting)?

    Thank you for your time.

  2. #2
    ED11356's Avatar
    ED11356 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Coworker put me in a friend zone

    If she has a boyfriend and is loyal to him, then you're pretty much out of luck and should move on.

    In the mean, sure, go for it. Can't hurt..
    Always be honest with women. That's the true meaning of a PUA.

  3. #3
    cdharders's Avatar
    cdharders is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Coworker put me in a friend zone

    A lot of mistakes were made. It is going to be incredibly difficult to recover this. You stated your intent. She wasn't interested, so she blew you off. One MAJOR reason I prefer indirect, so I can game her to like me first. The frame is TERRIBLE. If you pulled back slightly when you got the lunch invite, you'd be ok even with her framing you as friends, but you pushed, which now makes the group dynamics about THE WORST possible chance you have of seeing her.

    Sidenote: drinks is a lot better than lunch. Friends do lunch. GUys who sleep with girls do drinks.

    I'd highly recommend moving on or you are risking her telling the whole office taht you are creepy, and I'm guessing that's not a reputation that would suit your job.
    The Official Tinder Playbook--> http://conquerdatingapps.co m <--Stop swiping, start hooking up

  4. #4
    biots is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Coworker put me in a friend zone

    cdharders, mucho thanks. How would do "indirect" as you mention in your post?

    I think I will just ignore the woman from now on. I am not worried about my reputation at the firm- everyone at the office thinks I am a little crazy/weird anyways.

  5. #5
    ED11356's Avatar
    ED11356 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Coworker put me in a friend zone

    Quote Originally Posted by cdharders View Post

    Sidenote: drinks is a lot better than lunch. Friends do lunch. GUys who sleep with girls do drinks.
    I don't agree fully with this. Lunch is a good first date just to see whether you can be compatible with the other person. It's cheap and low-key.
    Always be honest with women. That's the true meaning of a PUA.

  6. #6
    biots is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Coworker put me in a friend zone

    I agree with ED11356 too. Even if I had asked her out for an evening drink, she could still have said " I will go drink with you as friends".


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