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  1. #1
    Coloradopua is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Cool Need help on next step!

    Okay so long story short. We met at a conference... I later found out she had a boyfriend..
    Played a couple bf destroyers and if I may say so found out it was not serious.

    Anyways I have asked her to hang out a few times and she has said yes, but never really let me set a date up. ( she is "always busy)...

    So we haven't talked for a couple weeks now. She texted me today..

    Her- where are you?

    Me- working, where are you!

    Her- at the conference!!

    Me- oo cool, and I care because?? Hahaha! Don't act like you miss me!!

    Her- what the hell!! Nooooooooo!!!

    ( stop talking for a couple hours)

    Me- OMG!! I just saw the craziest thing, do you have a twin??
    Her- what was it!! And no!! Lmao!!
    Me- I am down town right now with some friends and this girl just streaked right in front of me, she kinda looked like you!! Are you sure you don't have an evil twin.... Wait!!... Or are you the evil one?!!!
    Her- Hahahahahahahahaha!! ! That is hilarious.. And no this one does not undress.... Unless you are a creep and watching me shower :0.. Hahaha!
    Me- Shit!!! You found my tree stand I thought the camo would hide it!!! By the way nice curtains!! Haha!
    Her- bahahahahahahahaha! Jokes on you I don't have a window in my bathroom ! Haha!
    Me- Shit!! Now I got to go get my tree stand out of a strangers yard !! Awwkward!!
    Her- hahahahaha!! OMG creep
    Me- you were the one thinking about it!! Haha! So when you gonna stop flaking out on me??
    Her- we will hang out I promise!

    What do I do now????

  2. #2
    cdharders's Avatar
    cdharders is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help on next step!

    Ask for her availability- "What's your schedule like this week ?"

    Small talk and banter over text are great but without pushing for a meet up, you may as well jack off.
    The Official Tinder Playbook--> http://conquerdatingapps.co m <--Stop swiping, start hooking up

  3. #3
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help on next step!

    Messed up.move on hit the door of no coming home.you can but you need to talk to other for a while practicing.then may come back to it..

  4. #4
    marvilo's Avatar
    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help on next step!

    It kind of looks like she's calling the shots instead of you. You got to ease off the humor a little bit too because you don't want to be her personal monkey whose only job is to make her laugh.
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

  5. #5
    ballsd33p is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need help on next step!

    Great tips! Text game has never been a strength.

  6. #6
    Coloradopua is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need help on next step!

    Quote Originally Posted by marvilo View Post
    It kind of looks like she's calling the shots instead of you. You got to ease off the humor a little bit too because you don't want to be her personal monkey whose only job is to make her laugh.

    Question on this then. I took the advice of the group so far and started talking to other women. I had a date with a girl I met online, but she flaked too. Then I had a date with another girl I knew and she flaked too!! Hahahaha! So all of these girls I pretty much used the same thing as far as humor and still nothing!! So should I cut back on the humor altogether then??? Because it doesn't seem to be working for me!! Hahaha!

  7. #7
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
    I.M.Mortal is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help on next step!

    Colorado, ok you got some text gaming down in terms of triggering her emotions. Good. The big problem I can see is you are turning into a texting buddy and too much time playing texting grab-ass.

    B4U Text her, you need to have a plan and there should be a reason. Your plan should ultimately be to set date.

    Her initiating text is an indicator of strong interest. In the midst of her busy schedule, she is thinking of you. Good! The fact that she has a bf might be a factor why she flakes. Her time is most likely very busy because she is trying to juggle her work and time her guy. You got a difficult mode running.

    As for the flakiness, it really depends on the women. It could mean you have a string of bad luck. Pick-up is like sales. You not always going to close. However, if someone really likes your product (in this case, you), you close easier. However, there are things you can do to help out your tactic and better your odds.

    DEALING WITH FLAKES

    So in the instance of the primary girl you are working on, you want to make it appear and HINT to her that you have a busy lucrative life and it is YOU WHO IS FITTING HER INTO YOUR SCHEDULE. Right now it looks like the other way around. You need to demonstrate higher value on your time...that your time is valuable or else no women will respect it. So how do you do this?

    The next few times you contact her and make small talk and she ask you what you are up to? Just tell her how damn busy you are throughout the week, not necessarily with work, but with parties and times with friends.
    HER: Where are you (or what u up to?)
    U: Work. I have an hour free at last!...just to chill. I have to meet some friends later.

    Then probe her to find out what her schedule is like. For example:
    "Next week I'm taking a chiropractor lessons from Tom Cruise dressed as batman on the moon" or w/e BUT you want to end it with "but might get a few hours spare at some point, howʼs your week looking?"

    Then tell her you know this cool place (that you want to check out) and invite her. Then tell her the days that you can't do (e.g. you are going to be in another town, work, friends out of town visiting, etc.) Lie and make yourself look busy even if you are not.

    U: "So I think I’m fairly free on Thursday, oh no wait, I got a party that night, hmmm. So Thursday and Friday I can’t do."

    At this point, she might intervene and suggest evenings that she is free to which you respond:

    U: "I have Wednesday nights free, but I can only do after 7:30 pm."

    Lastly, as for your question on dialing down the humor. Yes. I would want to keep a fair balance between comfort and attraction. You don't want to get caught in an entertainer trap (I've been there myself). You don't want to come off as a clown. The danger of those two is you end up looking like you are trying too hard especially if it is not congruent to your personality in person and the girls won't take you seriously. Hence, more chances of flaking.

    Also, continue going out with other girls and maintain a playful persistence with your primary girl. Every so often, casually ask her out. Low expectations, don't overplan. You won't look needy that way.

  8. #8
    theeights is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help on next step!

    In my experience, girls who have BFs are more receptive when you escalate fast. They might bang you the night you meet her and pass it off as "something that just happened. Oops" but if you wait days or weeks then she'll have time to think about it and feel guilty which is bad news for you. A woman engaged to her boyfriend might even say they aren't 'serious' if the right conditions are met.

    Not that I'm a fan of ruining relationships. That's where you might get some chode who loses everything he cares about in life and decides to come after you with a gun. But I digress.

    I like the humour but I would definitely go more alpha and take control of the situation. Like others said, show how busy you are and that your time is valuable. If she wants more of you, she needs to put some effort into seeing you.


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