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  • 1 Post By Wizardry

Thread: One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

  1. #1
    Wizardry is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

    I dedicated my life early this year to the pickup arts. Like most AFCs in places where the quality of women appears to be lacking, one-itice seems to be a temptation and yet it backfires as I've learned the hard way.

    I met a girl 3 or 4 months ago downtown. Probably a 9. I approached the set and developed attraction. Talked for bout 25 mins. I fumbled the number close. She had told me where she worked though and i rolled the dice and went there few weeks later. Thankfully my charm was as good as i thought. got the number.

    At this point clear IOIs. Made her laugh a lot. whenever i mentioned anything sexual she giggled like a school girl. It felt so easy.

    but then i got lazy with my game. we texted only a little cuz my texts were mostly boring. I would go see her about every week or so and talk for bout 20 mins. I was clearly pursuing her and at times i feared i looked a lil chumpish. I called her a couple times but with no response ...things didnt feel right.

    Then on Facebook I noticed that she clearly had a boyfriend.

    Make a long story short, my charm wore off as I first got lazy and then began to overcompensate by trying too hard. For her birthday i had given her a bouquet of brocolli as joke poking fun at her vegetarianism. but i was clearly trying to hard. (although she actually thought it was hilarious.)
    I visited her one more time and she seemed distant. its been bout 2or3 weeks since ive seen her.

    I think my chance was blown and I actually accept responsibility and I'm not THAT upset. It still really sucks though.
    I was gonna just move on but part of me wants the experience of trying to resurrect the situation. Any advice on how you would handle this situation? Would you just walk away? I mean what would a real pro do other than not get himself in this situation to begin with?

    Id appreciate.

  2. #2
    marvilo's Avatar
    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

    I know it's hard but you got to move on. There's a saying that says guys tend to think about the women they failed to get rather than the ones they've gotten. So try to move on and talk to other people( I know that's a cliché)
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

  3. #3
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    Default Re: One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

    I'd say it's incredibly early in set to start talking about one-itis. I have a healthy obsessiveness with every single set I'm in. Meaning, I will always have the possibilities of what to do running in my head of how to make the situation better any chance I get, so I can close. All this being said, I'm also always opening more sets.
    For instance, a girl invited me out tonight but her friend pulled her away. Did I want to close? Of course. Will I always be thinking of how to make the close happen? Yes.
    But, 30 minutes later, I was in set with another chick that I pulled from the club and took back to her place.
    Kepp her in your mind, but game other girls.

    Yes, a true pro would not have let the first failure happen. He would have closed rather than number closed.
    The Official Tinder Playbook--> http://conquerdatingapps.co m <--Stop swiping, start hooking up

  4. #4
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

    Dont let that distract you.could pursue both

  5. #5
    Wizardry is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

    my sentiment too. Its not actually THAT bad. I went after her really for practice and in the back of my head I both underestimated and over estimated my game. Simply gotta learn from this.
    cdharders- "healthy obsessiveness" I like that phrase. I think you are talking "calibration" in a sense.
    hard rock- were u referring to cdharders?

    To be clear, to me "One-itice" is a mindset rather than an actual active situation where one guy is overly focused on one girl. There seems to be a time and place where a situation is too complicated and although a guy doesnt have to be perfect to be competent he must have at least exploited major opportunities. My critique of myself I think is manifold. The comfort building needed kino ASAP. The fear of looking needy caused me to wait too long. funny if you focus on avoiding weakness you become weak. Like prevent defense. I think i was shocked at how easy building attraction was that when it came to comfort i was unprepared. do yall think going to a girls work place after communication broke down with the number was a bad idea? was that really the end of the road although she still gave IOIs in person? What are the most important things I can learn from with this?

  6. #6
    NoctisCaelumPUA's Avatar
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    Default Re: One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

    Dang it what an awesome post. I like the way you pulled it off in person. What kind of place does she work at? I met a HB10 at a Bar that I am still obsessed with and fumbled the number close as well due to the BF rejection. However the way you portrayed this I think there is still hope since you proved to me second chances are possible.

    I was just wondering since she works at a Rooftop Construction Company 60 miles away and I was thinking about her lately and her BF doesn't have her listed in his friend's list plus I heard her crying about something after I met her on FB. Maybe they broke up I don't know. But I got her work email from Google and think going into a construction company would be major creeper status for me which is why I asked you where your girl works. I was thinking of emailing her. Is this a good idea? But for you I would recommend a meet up.
    101 Sets, 30 #'s, 4 K-closes, 1 Date, 1 Bar Pull. My next adventure starts Summer 2014 at the Brewfest, Water Park, Bars, Clubs, etc. Getting Hotels now to prevent driving drunk so really only 2-3 times a month doing Night Game June-Oct. Lots of Day Game.

  7. #7
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

    Always note that whenever a woman is giving shots she expects or is open to escalation.if you are not moving things ahead, even just the kiss, things may spiral downhill.Calibrate.
    'Omg! Wnt belive what happened..'
    It may not be best in dynamic but make best of it as in going to work.attract her more

  8. #8
    Wizardry is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

    she works at a pet store. I went in armed with confidence in her IOIs and funny things to stay about her dog she had told me she had. it was an australian shepherd and I asked her with a semi-serious tone if he talk with an accent and pledged alliance to the australian flag etc... I told her that I wasnt gonna keep paying for overpriced dog food to talk to her. I had her in the palm of my hand. she had a glow to her that I'm still getting used to getting from really attractive girls that are attracted to me. I really feel like at that time i worked with the best that i had and it worked. I never planned the next stage and relied on things just happeneing.
    My weakness is kino. Unfortunately I'm still too much of a nice guy but this girl hurts and it shows me you have to escalate. Things dont "work themselves out". I must lead interactions and be the man that sweeps her away from her boring boyfriend that i'm sure is a nice guy but obviously not pleasing her the way she wants. that sounds mean but its reality.
    I would go back but I think I would be setting myself up for the BF confession and essentially telling me what I already know. Part of me wants to test and just see. Thats the only part of me that convinces me to go. It would be an eduction in how reliable my gut is...

  9. #9
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: One-itice...and overcoming missed opportunities....

    Hey man lost your thread.Found it!!.go ahead and number close.just dont go there too much without taken action.start with this opener that girls in x town must be very friendly.drift into delivery then transition.


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