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  1. #1
    BruceTheShark is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Staying in contact with ex?

    Hey guys,

    So I have been pondering this topic for a while and wondered what you guys thought of it. Is it ok for someone to keep in contact with their ex if they are in a new relationship?

  2. #2
    SerialSeducer's Avatar
    SerialSeducer is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Staying in contact with ex?

    Believe it or not, the above question is a GREAT opener. Find a group of people and say "Hey guys, let me ask you a quick question and I'll get out of your way. My buddy here (point at wing) has an ex girlfriend who he broke up with a long time ago. He's stayed in touch--although only as friends. Now she wants to cut off all communication because she's in a new relationship. Who do you think is right?!"

    Anyway, back to your question.... I'm great friends with at least 2-3 of my exes. The above scenario, where i described an ex unwilling to continue a relationship with me because she was starting a new relationship, has ACTUALLY happened to me. My friend/ex-gf pretty much stopped all communication with me. What am I gonna do. Of course, although i have no feelings for her romantically any more, I did sleep with her about 3 months before she broke off communication. It was a one night only 'comfort' hook up--you know because it was there and easy and comfortable... so maybe there's a good reason to cut things off.

    After you get everyone's opinion in the set you opened with the 'ex-gf/friend conundrum' you can close with this: Oscar Wilde once said “Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.” I tend to agree with him. Usually most male-female relationships either exist in a perpetual state of unrequited love/desire OR in the precarious one-drink-too-many-next-thing-you-know-youre-naked state. I have five good female friends. I've slept with three of them, gotten frisky with another and made-out with the fifth.

  3. #3
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Staying in contact with ex?

    It depends if you have problems with it somethings not right for you.become more social talk to guys and girls if that pertains.in a nutshell always be social..etc.

  4. #4
    BruceTheShark is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Staying in contact with ex?

    SerialSeducer.. thanks so much man that was really helpful. I totally agree with you about the Oscar Wilde thing. I am friends with a few exes as well, but obviously there is that underlying subtext that we slept with each other. And I never really kept in contact with them during a new relationship. (One girl got mad at me for PLAYING WORDS WITH FRIENDS with an ex... wtf.)

    Anyway man, one last question and then I'm totally going to take your advice and use this as an opener. I know that you're friends with a few exes, but I pretty sure you are spending time sarging rather than in a committed, exclusive relationship. But if you did get into a new relationship in the future, would you date a chick who was friends with her exes? And would you drop the contact with yours? (OK, thats two questions)


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