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Thread: 29 - She wants me, but...

  1. #1
    twentynine's Avatar
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    Default 29 - She wants me, but...

    Alright this girl is seriously starting to get on my nerves. Here's the scoop:

    Dated this girl twice, HB9.. First date went great. Made out, agreed on a second date and parted ways. Date 2 went fantastically.. She invited me back to her place, we watched a movie and ended up in her bed. She put up MAJOR LMR that I couldn't get passed.. Probably because I was so hot for her that I moved too quick once in her bed. I slept over and we made out a bit more in the morning before I left.

    I've tried setting up a 3rd date a few times but to no avail. She still texts and hints at the idea of us seeing each other again.. She gets pretty flirty sometimes when we text, talks about sex and tells me I'm hot etc. She also has been sending me snapchats, some of them are pretty hot too.

    I wanna see her again and seal the deal. I know what you're thinking: She's a tease and a waste of time.. I know. But fark that, there's gotta be a way I can get her to meet up with me again. She's into me but she's playing hard to get.

    It's been over a month since I saw her last.. I don't really initiate texting, not very often. Sometimes a week goes by without any texting but she sends snapchats almost every day, and I send her some as well.

    Just now I got a somewhat racy (she's so sexy UGGHH) snapchat of her in bed that says "Need coffee". I sent one back that said "My hangover agrees" and now we've texted a couple times about coffee. I know for a fact she's baiting me into asking her to meet up for coffee, I'm pretty sure she'll just shut down the idea though which is hilarious.

    How would you guys handle this situation?

  2. #2
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    Default Re: 29 - She wants me, but...

    You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Just ask to meet up, if she says no then that's that. No need crying over spilled milk.
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

  3. #3
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    Default Re: 29 - She wants me, but...

    Thanks marvilo but I've taken a couple shots from different angles and missed on both. Need a new game plan here.

    I don't often have this problem, throwing me for a bit of a loop.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: 29 - She wants me, but...

    Be careful of getting wrapped up in her. I'm all about the conquest and the hunt. Just watch that it doesn't backfire on your mind.

    New game plan? A buddy of mine told me this.

    Use a time constraint.

    Ask her out for coffee, but say that you have to be some where in an hour and can't be out long. It'll make her feel comfortable and she doesn't have to worry about how long she's gonna be out with you and if you'll push for sex. Then once she's in your presence just remind her how awesome you are and tell her how your plans "fell through" and continue your time together.

    No talks of sex. Just lead her there without talking about it. And make sure you reach some rapport with her to help put with the LMR. Make her feel like you both have a real future together. I'm guessing that's what she wants anyways. Most women want relationships.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  5. #5
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    Default Re: 29 - She wants me, but...

    Personally, I would step back from texting and try to get her on the phone. Once on the phone I would just disqualify the shit out of her, and turn the tables on her. Don't lose sight of who you are and always remember that you're the shit. You want to convey this to try to get her to start chasing you. Also, don't let her get under your skin or else that could lead you to slipping up somewhere.

    I suggest getting her on the phone because you're probably not the only person she's teasing through text. You want to stand out form the pack by calling, while also receiving the benefits of calling. She'll be able to hear your voice which is HUGE. You'll be able to tease her, disqualify her, have a fun conversation with her, and even set up another date, all within a 10-20 minute conversation.

    Some disqualifiers/role reversal lines I would use on her over the phone:

    "I was setting up something for us to hang out soon, but I know (or you could say "past experiences have shown me...." instead of saying "I know") how eager and aggressive YOUR kind gets around handsome gent's like myself"

    "Blondes are cool, I'd totally be all over you if you were brunette though" You can use her race instead of hair color. "White girls are cool I guess. I'd totally be all over you if you were Hispanic though"

    Statements like that are very ballsy and polarizing and display your confidence. If she gets offended don't back down because you are a BOSS, whether you end up with her or not."

    One more disqualifier for good measure. You could use this after she makes a joke
    "Wow, adorable and a sense of humor. You're ALMOST the complete package. Now, if you weren't so flakey............" You could leave it at that and let her chime in or you could add "Now if you weren't so flakey, you just might attract someone like myself." You can let her chime in here and then drop this: "Don't get your hopes up though, my breed is very selective "

    Say it with a smile. It's another ballsy move cause you're calling her out on her shit. Just make sure you're stating it in a way that flakeyness is unattractive, and not in an angry tone. If you've played your cards right up until now, dropping that last line WILL get you a solid hangout. It's not too often a guy is willing to call a women out. If they do, it's normally out of anger, not as a means of disqaulifying her as not being good enough.

    I'm about to head out to work, but if anything else crosses my mind I'll be sure to stop back in and update. Good luck!

  6. #6
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    Default Re: 29 - She wants me, but...

    Hmm... This is an interesting situation. If you would have f-closed you most likely wouldn't be having this issue. If you got in her bed and didn't close it's because you moved too fast like you stated. Not enough foreplay or she wouldn't have shut you down.

    Listing has some good advice on dis-qualifiers. However, I should add that there is a very good possibility that she IS interested in you but she is seeing someone else and sleeping with them. She could very easily be stringing you along in case her "other" guy falls through. Even if a women is interested in two different guys to the same degree, but she has more invested in one of the relationship's, she will stay with the guy she has more investment with.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: 29 - She wants me, but...

    Thanks guys, some things there that I hadn't considered. I think the next time she starts texting I'll just call her.

    I almost get the feeling that she's trying to get me to chase her, because she's used to being chased.. It's probably a little baffling to her that she sends cute little snapchaps etc and yet I don't chase her and text her non-stop like she's used to from other guys. Perhaps it makes her uncomfortable even, that I don't constantly text her etc. I dunno.

    Here's an example. I sent a snapchat to her last weekend, of me dancing like a goof and pretending to be sexy (it was actually really funny, I sent it to like 4 girls and got amazing reactions over it). She replied with one and we went back and forth and then she started texting me, just asking me what I was doing etc. It was pretty much instant texts back and forth, 3 or 4 each, and then I simply asked what she was getting up to on the weekend. No response. Lol.. Almost seems intentional sometimes, like I'm being gamed or something.

    I wanna make it clear that I'm in no way hung up on this chick, as it may seem from this thread. I have 9 or 10 girls in my phone right now that I text with almost daily and/or am dating. That number could be higher but I don't have time for it to be.. She's super hot, it's that simple. Also It's a weird situation and I'd like to come away feeling like I learned something from it, rather than gave up and didn't learn anything.

    Thanks fellas.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: 29 - She wants me, but...

    One more disqualifier for good measure. You could use this after she makes a joke
    "Wow, adorable and a sense of humor. You're ALMOST the complete package. Now, if you weren't so flakey............" You could leave it at that and let her chime in or you could add "Now if you weren't so flakey, you just might attract someone like myself." You can let her chime in here and then drop this: "Don't get your hopes up though, my breed is very selective "

    Lilsting.
    I just wanted to say this is farking awesome & I'm stealing this & using it on every single flakey girl I encounter for the rest of my life.
    You're the man.
    -Kyle.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: 29 - She wants me, but...

    Haha np brother. I called a woman today who I hadn't spoken to in well over a year (not including text from yesterday), and used a variation of the line on her. She's not even flakey and she loved it! haha

    To TwentyNine:

    Trust me, she is trying to get you to chase her. That fact that you're not is keeping you in the game. Find a way to get her to chase you and it's checkmate! She is purposely playing those "games" with you, and that kind of stuff irritates me. She can't pull that nonsense on the phone!

  10. #10
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    Default Re: 29 - She wants me, but...

    Still workin on this one.. I went ice skating today, sent her a snapchat (she sent about 6 snapchats in a row to me throughout the day yesterday, and a bit of texting ensued last night, some flirting etc..). She responded to my snap with one of her own; her laying on her bed in lingerie with the caption "Hope this distracts you and you FALL!". I texted her about 10 mins later with "Lol clever AND sexy. Now if only you weren't so flakey.."

    No response. Haha. This chick is such a little asshole.

    PS: I've tried calling a couple times, she doesn't answer and then texts saying she wasn't near her phone. Clearly on purpose. I've stated before that younger girls these days are scared of talking on the phone, and this one is a good example.


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