So, I've made out with a woman I work with several times over the last 6 weeks or so (not the same one as in a previous thread). And she's very... I'm not sure what the word is but...

When we kiss, I can really feel her melt (for want of a less corny word). She really lets go and gets really into it, but it never lasts more than a minute or so before she kinda freaks out, like she can feel herself losing control and it scares her.

It's token resistance, in that I can simply start kissing her again and she gets straight back into it, but it's kinda strong in that it's again and again and again, and she really seems uncomfortable, if only momentarily.

She's admitted that she's liked me since we first met, about a year and a half ago, so it's kinda intense for her that her fantasy is becoming reality (and might not live up to the fantasy?) and isn't as safe as the fantasy, or something.

She's also said of her own personality that she does, in general, have a tendency to flip-flop between carefree and fun-loving, and withdrawn and introverted. I've seen plenty of evidence of this.

On Tuesday, I'd invited her to mine for dinner, but in the end we agreed, for various reasons, to just go out for a few drinks and a pizza instead.

Then today, I texted her...

Me: Your jambalaya invitation is transferable to tonight. You want some?
Her: Depends, is this an actual dinner invite or a booty call?
Me: Both.
Her: I figured.
Her: The first one doable, second not so much still interested?
Me: Sure.
Her: Had to think about that one, didn't you when/where?
Me: 8pm [my address].

She's not replied yet, but I think she'll come. I can picture her right now, talking to her roommate about it in a frenzy of, "Yes, but no, but yes, but... I don't know."

I've been honest in my intentions and she's still coming over (I assume), and I have no doubt that she wants me - she REALLY wants me. But something pretty strong, and pretty disruptive, is holding her back. I think she wants me to overcome whatever that is, because she can't. But how?

My options as far as I know are:

1) Back off completely tonight - just have dinner. This could trigger her to be more... aggressive, which would be great. Even if not, it would probably still make her more comfortable if I demonstrate that I'm not all about the sex.

2) Just plough on through. While her resistance has been persistent and dramatic, it's never really been at all strong, so this could certainly work pretty smoothly. But it could completely freak her out, which would be a shame.

3) Some cunning combination of 1 & 2.

All insight and suggestions gratefully welcomed.