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  • 1 Post By TheDuke

Thread: Advise to get my ex back

  1. #1
    stephen912 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Advise to get my ex back

    We were engaged up until about 6 weeks ago. She was cheating so I left her. Its worth it to try to fix this. I don't necessarily want that to become the debate.

    Anyways... I've read all the posts, and actually been spending a lot of time on my inner game. I listen to like, 5 Arash Dibazar sessions a day. I've been working out literally has hard and often as a man could possibly work out and dropping weight. I look different, dress different, and am now significantly more alpha. People have noticed. However I don't want to fold like a piece of paper if/when I see her. I went no contact for 6 weeks now.

    Here's the situation...She cold messaged me last night at 12:30am last night. It said:

    Hey Stephen, please hear me out,
    I truly am sorry for everything that happened and how it happened. I understand if you do not wish to speak to me but I know I left some stuff at your house that is really important for me to get back. It doesn't matter how I receive it whether i meet you to get it or you giving it to *** or even you putting it outside but all I ask which I know I shouldn't ask you for anything at this point but all I ask is for you to let me get it back. Please just respond and let me know or let *** or ***** know. Sorry to ask but please Stephen.


    Here's the kicker... there is NOTHING left of her's at my house. I dropped off everything 6 weeks ago, and then anything that was forgotten (very little), was given to her by my roomate 4 weeks ago. There is NOTHING here and she knows it. She is a 10, and not used to being shut out like have done to her. I'm pretty sure every ex in her life has chased her after the fact. Everything in me tells me this is attention seeking behavior and an IOI with a justification. She could have just messaged my roomate like last time if not.

    What's my best move. Thanks!

  2. #2
    DirectIsBest's Avatar
    DirectIsBest is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advise to get my ex back

    Dude she cheated on you! Ignore her and move on. Personally I would never get back with a girl that cheated on me. She went and screwed up and now shes going to have to deal with that fact.

    Seriously screw her. Have some self respect and date someone else. Who cares what she looks like. Dating a seven that's loyal and trustworthy is WAY better than dating a 10 that will cheat on you.

  3. #3
    TheDuke's Avatar
    TheDuke is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advise to get my ex back

    You think you've changed, but you haven't. If you had changed, you'd have more self respect than you're showing. Let her take it from some other guy and cheat on him, while you go find a girl worth your time.
    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

  4. #4
    stephen912 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Advise to get my ex back

    See this is what I was afraid of. The fact is that I HAVE changed. But this wasn't just a gf. This was a fiancÚ full with ring,dress,venue, everything. Yeah she was a horrible person for what she did. I'm honestly not even sure I really want her back. I guess my thread title sabotaged me. I've had sex with 3 girls since. I can get that when I need it.

    More than anything, I guess I just want this girl chasing me again. That's the advise I'm looking for I guess.

  5. #5
    SCooper2031 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advise to get my ex back

    Quote Originally Posted by stephen912 View Post
    See this is what I was afraid of. The fact is that I HAVE changed. But this wasn't just a gf. This was a fiancÚ full with ring,dress,venue, everything. Yeah she was a horrible person for what she did. I'm honestly not even sure I really want her back. I guess my thread title sabotaged me. I've had sex with 3 girls since. I can get that when I need it.

    More than anything, I guess I just want this girl chasing me again. That's the advise I'm looking for I guess.
    Bro no! I know that's not what you want to hear, but why would you want her chasing you? It seems you love the relationship and the idea of the girl chasing you, not necessarily her. You just admitted she's a bad person for what she did. And you know DARN well she'll do it again.

    Maybe you weren't satisfying her sexually, or maybe you were and she was just extra horny. I don't know. All I know is you would be making a big mistake trying to get her back, and I think you know that!

    You said getting a girl isn't a problem for you, so therefore you should have no problem finding a better person to take that relationship role.

    Good luck budddy

  6. #6
    Mac7-16 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Advise to get my ex back

    I've been cheated on too, about a year ago. My girlfriend was living with me at the time, we got into a fight and she decided to stay at her friends for a little while so we could both cool off. Well I acted like a little bitch and begged for her to come back home, tried convincing her things would be different, I was needy, I was AFC.

    To make a long story short, she was cheating on me the whole time, while keeping me around as a "back up". I got CUCKHOLDED. This is exactly what made me want to become a PUA. I promised myself this would never happen again.

    What you need to do is PUSH HER AWAY. Keep working out, go out a lot, stay busy. Show her that you don't need her. SHE will come crawling back to you. That's exactly what she's doing with that message she sent you. Play it cool, don't act overly interested in what's going on in her life. If she asks how you've been, tell her you've been really busy and you've been focusing a lot on your goals, things you couldn't do when there was a wedding planned. BUT... Don't brag, she will know. Kind of neg her, but be more mean about it. Show her you have a set of balls.

    Now, to this day, my ex is always trying to get back with me. She always is the first to text me, I never contact her first. She asks to hang out, I blow her off and blow her off then I fark her and send her on her way. Now she's cheating on her boyfriend with ME.

    This might not be a good idea for you since you're still emotionally attached to her. The difference with me is; I have no feelings for her anymore. I just look at her as a booty call. Also, I like how the tables have turned (she's chasing me now).

    BOTTOM LINE IS: She cheated on you bro, and, more than likely, will do it again. You don't want to try to "fix" your relationship. You need to get over her.You can do way better . Besides, girls like that are a dime a dozen.


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