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  • 1 Post By Ra1d
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Thread: How soon to kiss a girl after IOIís? Did I wait too long?

  1. #1
    Jaz
    Jaz is offline PUA in Training
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    Default How soon to kiss a girl after IOIís? Did I wait too long?

    Hi All,

    Was in this bar/club last night, started talking to this cute girl that was walking past me. Straightaway she was feeling my arm a bit (I like to stay in shape) to which I made a joke about her trying to feel muscles. Also, at the beginning of the interaction there were a couple of times where our faces and lips were very close to each other while we were talking as she came in quite close to me.

    Now, me realising these were IOIís, decided to try a half assed hair stroke move (I know that if a girl letís you stroke her hair she is ready to be kissed etc etc) where I put my hand through her hair briefly and said I need to ask you something. She let me stroke her ok actually without moving back or anything, but due to me thinking this was too soon, I asked her some bullshit question rather than going in for the kiss.

    A bit later on the interaction was dying down, so with me feeling annoyed with myself for not taking the chance earlier and thinking I need to move faster, I (kind of) went for the kiss but it felt really unnatural and forced now, and I ended up kissing her on the cheek as the kiss didnít seem forthcoming. Needless to say, she left not long after that after I had changed the subject (so what do u do? etc) and playfully teased her about it. Though, I did still found this a bit surprising given her apparent level of interest at the beginning.


    So, where did I go wrong? It felt very annoying as I thought this showed a lot of promise early on.

    How soon in this interaction was the right time to go for the kiss and how would you have done it?

    Also, in general, how soon is it possible to go in for the kiss if the situation is right? I realise this could be slightly dependent on culture and country so letís assume weíre talking in the UK/US here.

    Thanks for any advice. It almost feels worse having the chance and not taking it, rather than not having the chance at all!

  2. #2
    Ra1d is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How soon to kiss a girl after IOIís? Did I wait too long?

    You didn't go wrong anywhere,she didn't even have the chance to reject you,because you never went for a proper kiss,it doesn't even look like she would reject you.

    All you did wrong was not make a move.

    In general,you could go for a kiss after a few minutes in,if you're comfortable with yourself and assume the time is always right.

    Watch Hot Singalz on youtube,that guy kiss closes in almost all of his videos,look how long that takes him.

  3. #3
    Jaz
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    Default Re: How soon to kiss a girl after IOIís? Did I wait too long?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ra1d View Post
    You didn't go wrong anywhere,she didn't even have the chance to reject you,because you never went for a proper kiss,it doesn't even look like she would reject you.

    All you did wrong was not make a move.

    In general,you could go for a kiss after a few minutes in,if you're comfortable with yourself and assume the time is always right.

    Watch Hot Singalz on youtube,that guy kiss closes in almost all of his videos,look how long that takes him.
    Thanks, I suppose it's practice and calibration, plus the need to push oneself out of their comfort zone and not be afraid to fark up!

    Couldn't find the videos on youtube though...

  4. #4
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    Default Re: How soon to kiss a girl after IOIís? Did I wait too long?

    There's no set time limit. As soon as you see IOI's like that you can go for it. As soon as a woman I'm talking to gets very close like that (faces get close) I go for it. Very rarely will they turn away and even if they do, it doesn't matter that much. If she turns away keep gaming like nothing happened. I usually give a big smile and laugh or something and continue. I met a girl at a show that I ended up dating for more than a year. She approached me and I didn't even say a single word to her, I just went for the kiss immediately.

  5. #5
    Ra1d is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How soon to kiss a girl after IOIís? Did I wait too long?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jaz View Post
    Thanks, I suppose it's practice and calibration, plus the need to push oneself out of their comfort zone and not be afraid to fark up!

    Couldn't find the videos on youtube though...
    It's Honest Signalz,not Hot Signalz,my bad

  6. #6
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    Default Re: How soon to kiss a girl after IOIís? Did I wait too long?

    I always go for the kiss. Even on some of my best girlfriends. Even on girls that I'm "Just friends" with. Girls love to kiss, and they love when guys go for it.

    She'll still be your friend if she rejects you afterwards, and even if you guys make out, she'll be EVEN more of your friend after if you're just honest. Kissing brings people together and connects them.

    It's innocent, and fun, and it's low investment on a girls part. Nobody asks a girl how many guys she's kissed, it's all about how many guys she's slept with. Nobody cares. You feel me?

    The trick is to turn those make-out sessions, into sex, or blowjobs.

    Just be a fearless bastard and you'll be surprised at how HARD it is to get rejected.

    To answer your question though, as soon as she gives you an IOI, or a flirty vibe, go for the kiss. UNLESS, their are weird people around, or it's an uncomfortable situation.

    A.K.A. Workplace, Funeral, middle of a college class, church, in front of her mom/dad, in front of her best friends, in front of her little sister, behind a dumpster, ALL BAD HORRIBLE IDEAS for a first kiss, or make out session.

    But if you're somewhere semi-private, or it's not a weird situation by any means, GO FOR IT MY MAN ASAP.

  7. #7
    Jaz
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    Default Re: How soon to kiss a girl after IOIís? Did I wait too long?

    Thanks all for your replies, it's told me all I need to know in order not to have any doubt and just go for it next time.


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