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  1. #1
    Bobby I is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Getting the ex back, going downhill

    Hi everyone, been trying to get my ex back for a few months now. Read one thread telling me to go non contact, have various other people on other forums to tell me that was a bad idea. Got told to blow up my fb with just generally social situations and if i ever do status' make sure they're all upbeat and happy. However, i was convinced me and her were friends, have a little chat on saturday, all good and going well, gone onto facebook today and she's deleted me. I have no idea why, didn't know whether to say anything about it, or not? And if i do say something, what should i say.... Sorry just a newbie trying to learn... cheers

  2. #2
    kylemc is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Getting the ex back, going downhill

    My advice is move on bro she's long gone and the fact she deleted you on FB proves that. You've developed a "oneitis" to get rid of it you need to game other girls.

    If she was to get back with you anyway you'll either dump her or be dumped for the same reason. Its best to leave it as it is and move on to game other girls. If she gets mad over you gaming other girls that's her problem not yours if she didn't want you doing that then she wouldn't of dumped you in the first place.
    Last edited by kylemc; 06-12-2014 at 06:52 PM. Reason: made a few mistakes
    "A man who stands for nothing, will fall for anything" - Malcom X

  3. #3
    Bobby I is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Getting the ex back, going downhill

    Yeah man, i know you're right. It just sucks. Honestly never feel like this about any girl, i actually do really well in the female department, just her, i struggle with. Probably why im so crazy about her.

  4. #4
    kylemc is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Getting the ex back, going downhill

    We've all been there brother, I actually saw a video from RSD Tyler about this sort of stuff and he was saying it's the best time to game as you will be more concentrated on improving yourself while at the same time feel down.

    Remember its her loss not yours if you show it doesn't affect you then your already one step closer to feeling better that she's gone
    "A man who stands for nothing, will fall for anything" - Malcom X

  5. #5
    Bobby I is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Getting the ex back, going downhill

    Thanks. I guess thats my only option. I need to re read the game and improve. Could do with a decent wingman.

  6. #6
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    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Getting the ex back, going downhill

    i think if you want specific advice you're going to have to give specific details.

    i can only generalize this advice. if you want her back in your life you have to acknowledge the things that weren't working. reflect on them and how they are corresponding to you as an individual as much as her. you can't just expect her to take you back if things are the same. this is just my assumption because you gave us no details that you really can't latch onto her because you're coming off as needy and you're chasing her. you're giving yourself no value. use the principles of the game and respect yourself. look at the problems that were presented to you and address them. i don't mean turn into a different person--i mean understand why they were a problem, and move forward and as those problems are about to reoccur--let the person you're involved with know that you might go down that path again.

    again this advice is extremely blind because you've given us nothing to work with. i can only assume she wants nothing to do with you because you did something or didn't do enough of something. it doesn't sound like you broke up with her and now want her back. anyways... good luck.
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  7. #7
    Bobby I is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Getting the ex back, going downhill

    Thanks. I will try to give you a bit more detail without making it too long and too boring.
    Her ex left her 4 months before we met, between me and her meeting she just fooled about with a couple of guys. The night we met we hit it off, exchanged numbers, text for a few days and then she stopped replying. I left it and saw her out around a month later and she got really jealous because i was with 2 other hot blond chicks (weird seeing as we only met the once). That night she bought me a drink and told me to meet her at the bar, she also told me that the reason she didn't text back was because she instantly liked me and was scared because she wasn't ready for a relationship and she hadn't like anyone even remotely until me. Started seeing each other, very casual, very cool, which she told me she liked. After about 4 months a lot went on in my life, Dad went bankrupt and i bailed him out, best friend got cancer at the age of 24 and i told no one, just bottled it up and become clingy, needy and angry. I also then left her, i just wanted a reaction to be honest and i wasn't thinking straight. We then worked it out, got back together, a week later she ended it. Mainly because of me being a dick. But im not that guy, just went through a really tough time and didn't handle it well. I've since explained that and we were friends, kind of. We speak when we see each other out quite regularly and she sees me with quite alot of girls, which i dont think she likes but i never get intimate with anyone in front of her. Also i catch her leaving clubs looking at me while leaving and trying to get my attention. It sounds so silly but im 100% sure she still likes me. Ridiculous i know, given the fact she's just deleted me. Thats pretty much the fundamentals. Sorry for a boring read.

  8. #8
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    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Getting the ex back, going downhill

    personally i don't think it's boring. the facts are useful. it shows how complicated things really are.

    have you approached her directly? if so how was her reaction about just getting back together?

    if anything i'd suggest treating the situation like it's LMR. if she isn't running from you treat every sign as green until she gives you a red one. if she does just ask why. if it comes down to you bottling up your feelings i think you might need to qualify yourself to her or even disqualifying yourself so you can build a latter in a cold read to see if she agrees. this way you can at least find a better way qualify yourself and see if she's still interested. if she's not 100% interested... walk away. if she continues to show signs of interest then start slow but keep pushing and read her signs properly.
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  9. #9
    Bobby I is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Getting the ex back, going downhill

    Thanks alot, all great advice. No i haven't approached her directly, im too afraid of blowing it completely out of the water and showing too much interest, typical oneitis here i think. Might be an idea jsut to buck up some courage and try that, maybe.

  10. #10
    artandale's Avatar
    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Getting the ex back, going downhill

    does she know about you bottling up??? cuz if she doesn't it makes sense why she broke it off.
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.


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