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  • 1 Post By I.M.Mortal

Thread: Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

  1. #1
    Robdoggyzone is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

    Hi forumers!

    I am new to the world of PUA but already got a few results and enjoying it so thanks already for what you guys have been doing. But hopefully you will be to help me with my first post

    I recently (Monday) managed to pick up a girl (she's actually model) and got laid that night at her friends place. I chilled with her and her friend the next morning and she gave me her phone number & FB account. We exchanged quite a few messages since and she seemed keen saying am funny n stuff. I thought it would be a good idea to leave a bit of time before seeing her again. She invited me yesterday evening (Thursday) to take some salsa lessons given by her flatmate, which I did. She's quite of an expert in salsa, it was my very first time. I got a few moves and she recognized I was learning well. Once the lessons finished, more people got into the pub and danced salsa but it was getting difficult for me (easier when everyone is learning and you can follow the coach!) - She was dancing with everyone & fair do, she enjoyed herself dancing with people who can dance. I was so horny looking at her dancing. I pulled her aside to let her known but we were still next to the main door of the club. I kissed her but not properly since I didn't want to kiss her in public - I didn't know whether I should have gone for it or not (she didn't reject me), but since I was convinced I would go back to hers afterwards I didn't not to put her off.

    Anyway when the club closed, she asked what I was doing tomorrow and exchanged a few inner jokes about me not going back to hers. She said she had to wake up early. I did kissed her before she left though (semi french kissed).

    Pretty much straight after, she sent me 3 texts in 10min:
    -sorry I had to rush off
    -And I will see you tomorrow Ill cook something nice xx
    -Sorry if I seem weird I am like that at salsa I just go and danceand then keep everything else separately lol sorry I am a bit bonkers but very happy you came my friends think u r very nice
    She even posted on FB a status thanking everyone for coming to the night (hashtagging me and 14 others)

    I was pissed by then and frustrated & couldn't understand why she didn't invite me back to her place... Anyway almost 1h30 min later (she was probably sleeping by then) I sent back 2 texts in 10min:
    -Dear vanilla bianca [inner joke]! It was a real pleasure & leisure to be there. Watching miss swan dancing n smelling made my night so good i cant even tell ya how much... I am eating the most disgusting burger ever but somehow wish I could eat it with you! Just because its a double cheesburger... [she's vegetarian] Wish you a good health to yar toe [she broke her nail - I know its not english but Iam french and pissed] n sweet dreams to you xx
    -Cant wait for some lovely cookin tmw! Gd luck with the waking up, am gonna be lying in x

    I probably shouldnt have sent back these texts, especially pissed, and I feel like I fucked it up... Any advice about how to make it up please???

  2. #2
    Robdoggyzone is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

    I also start thinking that she actually may not be into me and want me as a friend only!? What makes me say this is that the day that followed the night we had sex, I found her a bit distant (we were with her friend who has kids); I could kiss her when just the two of us but when saying good bye I kinda gave her a proper kiss and even though we were in the corridor of the house, she was like 'not in front of the children'...

    As you can see I am all confused..

    Cheers

  3. #3
    Aleski23 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

    Your texts weren't so bad , i mean you could have done better but i doubt it was enough to push her away .

    Here is the deal ,you have nothing to be confused about, she's into you period

    She's not being distant , just respect her boundaries , she's not ready to show physical affection yet , that's understandable . You 2 barely met . Take it in the bedroom or when you 2 are alone somewhere,

    Why were you pissed that she didn't invite you back at her place? She had to get up early in the morning , that should be good enough excuse.

    Everything seem to be doing fine , chill out , enjoy the moments you have with her , don't make a big deal out of everything & nothing.
    You need to start taking the lead , invite her out / at your place or what not and cook something for her . If you're not a good cook, order something and make a funny joke (if you order pizza) "I told you i made the best Pizza".


    By the way i'm French to , tu habites ou?

  4. #4
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    WillEdward is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

    You're fine. She seems to be really interested in you as she is qualifying herself through text and you already had sex with her. You don't need to qualify too much in your texts.
    Elevate Your Game | Check out my blog for lay reports, attraction and dancefloor game tips !

    willedward.com

  5. #5
    Carter21 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

    Those texts are fine, it looks like you're just a pessimist and thats skewing your perception of the situation.

    Her texts show IOI's through the roof. You are in an awesome situation.

  6. #6
    daffyff is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

    She became distant after sex because she feels she gave it up too soon. She is totally, very much into you!! Don't ruin this by being selfish and insecure. And you are being VERY insecure. It is terribly obvious you are insecure because you are misinterpreting her amazingly huge IOIs as IOD's for some reason. This is a serious flaw in your inner game and must be addressed immediately.

  7. #7
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
    I.M.Mortal is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

    Rob, welcome to the community. I am also happy to help out another salsa dancer.

    Your texts are fine. The only thing I would advise you on is that when texting "less is more." But what you said wasn't a dealbreaker.

    I have to agree with the other posters. Right now, you sound insecure and unsure. It's causing you anxiety. At this rate, this is going to undo you. A guy's confidence is the cornerstone of his inner game. It is the foundation of the art of seduction.

    If you are getting pissed off over something that small, then it demonstrates that your frame and innergame is weak. You are reactive and that is not attractive once she catches on to that. Girls are looking for a guy who is like a rock in the midst of a sea storm.

    BTW I am a salsa dancer myself in my 11 month. I am dating my salsa teacher and my confidence is what really got me as far as I did. Like your girl, my girl is a model and very high value. A lot of guys are crazy for her and she is flirty.

    Couple things to remind you of your inner game especially when it comes to dating a salsa dancer:

    - I don't care how pretty the girl is, DO NOT PUT HER ON THE PEDESTAL. That means do not give up all your value by giving her your attention. When you give your attention to a pretty girl like that, it sub-communicates to her that you are not use to being around a girl like her. Because if you were a high value man, why would you give it up so easily?
    - When she doesn't give you attention, then you mirror her. DON'T CHASE HER. Go talk to other girls
    - DO NOT GET MAD. Maintain your frame. Be very "Whatever" about things that she does that bother you, especially if she doesn't give you attention.
    - She is a salsa dancer. A lot of guys will be hitting her up for dances. Let her dance with other guys. And when she is dancing with other guys, it will look like she is having fun and in the moment (aka Dance Orgasms), therefore, don't get pissed and jealous. Let her go. Don't wait around for her like a needy orbiter. Talk/dance with other girls. Look like you are having a good time.
    - I live by a creed: "A real man knows how to make a woman feel like a real woman" You do that by letting her go and not cramping her style. She will appreciate that. Because when she feels like a real woman, she will make you feel like a man. If you let her go and if things are real between you two, she will come back. If she doesn't come back then she was never yours to begin with.
    - The girl I am dating this is what her 2 ex's did...
    Ex#1 - Didn't let her dance with other guys. She can only dance with guys that they both knew well. She wasn't allowed to do dips.
    Ex#2 - Started to get suspicious of her private lessons. He started checking and reading her texts.

    Suffice to say, she broke it off with these guys. DON'T BECOME THESE GUYS. This is why I am successful while other guys fail. As Sun-Tzu said in the Art of War "You win by other men losing."

    You are doing fine with this girl. Be confident and always assume she is attracted to you. Do not fvck yourself by being a reactive chump.

  8. #8
    daffyff is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

    The interesting thing about the OP is that he seems to have really solid natural game. His texts and actions do not betray any of his insecurities. Every response agrees with this. It's super curious that he has so much doubt about it. His world view is so skewed, I would go so far as to suggest therapy.

  9. #9
    Robdoggyzone is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Advice about how to recover from bad texting the cute Girl I am into

    Hi Everyone


    Thanks a lot for your advice guys – It gave me back some confidence.


    @daffyff – What kind of therapy are you talking about? I think if my view is so skewed is because I have the feeling the sex we had on the 1st date wasn’t so great (I haven’t had sex in a long time before, it was my first come back on the game…) & this was by a hangover situation.


    @ IM Mortal , my salsa brother – I played it cool that night & let her dance with other dudes that can actually dance – during this time I was actually chatting to other hot girls like you were suggesting (some were friends of hers) and often she was coming joining the conversation, showing her interest… Enjoy your time with yours, I love their hips moves


    @ Carter – Awesome situation indeed, cheers bud.
    Anyway I didn’t have time to read all the threads over the week end as it was pretty busy. Although I played it cool, and got back in touch with her it was all cool. We ended up meeting up yesterday for a picnic. It was all smooth and groovy – @ IM Mortal agree on the ‘DO NOT PUT HER ON A PEDESTAL although to what extent!? E.g. before meeting up she did text something like ‘Dressed in blue & look bloody tired’ to which I replied ‘Marvelous & We are even matching colour’ – Anyway she made me listen to her favourite songs and took advantage of the moment to kiss her again. Kept teasing her to build the tension about making out in the park but only walked her back to the place she is staying (@ friends cause she super broke and can’t even pay rent). She didn’t want to come back to my place because of important meeting this morning to sort out her financial situation… I walker her home & when I got home I did text her I was still well horny and asked her if she was still wet (I actually squirted her with a ring – inner joke). Is it important to send such text after such a date or should I wait the next day? Or should I focus more onto how good was the experience? (which links up with my uncertainty about how much you should put her on a pedestal @ IM Mortal …)


    She should come with me to my friends tonight for a meal he’s giving as I am going home for a month… Gutted in a way! Especially since she is going to study down south the country in September to study… Hoping to get her back to mine tonight to do my best hook her onto me so I could still keep options available in the future. Any advice about how to amplify our experience tonight? Would playing the ‘romantic card’ be any good (e.g. candles, massages & stuff!?)??


    OMG girls really make you feel alive – Wish we could have unlimited credit of time, money and semen to overtake the world


    PS : @ Aleski, I am from near Lyon but live in Sheffield (UK). You?


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