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  1. #1
    wildstorms's Avatar
    wildstorms is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default After doing some soul searching...

    Hey everyone thanks for reading, thanks Bill, nice forum.

    Recently through constant social interactions with people, I realized that since I'm born an introvert, I actually don't care about my relationships with people, I mean rarely do I look people in the eyes when in conversation.

    I realized that I never really cherished the deep connections that I created with so many in the past. It really bothers me and I don't like it now that I see it. I want to be better than that. Is there somewhere I can start for change? Even any ideas of books or authors?

    thanks again

  2. #2
    jayk238 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: After doing some soul searching...

    CBT. No body is born intro or extrovert. Its the environment around you and the familiy that raises you that defines who you become But it is not permanent. You need to change your behavior by focusing on your attitude. CBT can help with that. Seek a behavioral therapist.

    If it is a fear of social interaction it maybe anxiety and a psychiatrist can help with that.

  3. #3
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    TheDuke is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: After doing some soul searching...

    ^ This is likely bullshit. This doesn't give any credit to genetics and that is a beta bitch mistake to make. Game and PUA is totally informed by genetics, and by denying it's role, you're doing this guy a huge disfavor.

    As far as psychiatry and therapy, I just can't stand behind it. It has it's place, but this isn't it IMO. Psychiatry is mostly informed by mainstream thinking, much of which I believe is wrong and misinformed. There are some therapists and psychiatrists who step outside the professional norm, but they are few and far between.

    As for getting beyond the introvert problem, you probably can't move beyond it completely. What you can do is make choices in your life that reflect the person you want to be, even if you can't ever fully become that person.

    Want to go out more? Just do it.

    Want to talk to more people? Set a goal to meet 5 new people every day.

    Want to create deeper connections? Make it a priority to ask people personal questions.

    Just make the stuff you want to happen actually happen. Set goals and make sure you meet them. Join clubs, organizations, or sports teams with like minded individuals.

    I know this is the "just do it" Nike advice, but really, that's the only way to do it.
    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

  4. #4
    wildstorms's Avatar
    wildstorms is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: After doing some soul searching...

    Quote Originally Posted by TheDuke View Post
    Want to go out more? Just do it.

    Want to talk to more people? Set a goal to meet 5 new people every day.

    Want to create deeper connections? Make it a priority to ask people personal questions.

    Just make the stuff you want to happen actually happen. Set goals and make sure you meet them. Join clubs, organizations, or sports teams with like minded individuals.

    I know this is the "just do it" Nike advice, but really, that's the only way to do it.
    Thanks TheDuke. That is the only way I see for it to be possible as well. Just keep grinding for it. Have a good one.

  5. #5
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    artandale is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: After doing some soul searching...

    If you want to improve just fail. You learn by failing. Failing is a gift. Tripple your failure rate. Improve yourself because no one is going to improve you for yourself. Do things for yourself so you can feel better about yourself. You only have one life, live it for yourself. Not for your girlfriend. Not for your friends. Not for your family. The bonus is that everyone can help improve your life because you benefit from them being around because you choose to have them around.

    The biggest issue everyone has is that they get comfortable and stay inside a safe zone. When you're safe you're unlikely to grow. When you take risks you can lose a lot of things but you gain ample of oppurtunities. As Charles Bukowski once said "You never win if you don't gamble"
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.


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