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Thread: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

  1. #1
    xHITCHx's Avatar
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    Lightbulb IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    Oy everybody!


    For the longest time I've had trouble differentiating between when a potential TARGET is showing me IOIs, or just plain ol' being friendly. Now there are times when I can sort of "feel it" in my gut and other times where I am completely oblivious to any sort of advances. I have been getting better since then by reading up on here about IOIs but basically my question is: Is there a way to tell the difference between when a girl is just being overly-friendly or giving you IOIs?


    PS: This is my first ever thread.
    "Fidelio"

  2. #2
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    Default Re: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    Here is my advice...

    The ability to read body language and IOIs takes a lot of skill and exposure to women to really get good at.

    There's also various levels of IOIs. The girl could be mildly interested in you to having the hots for you. If the girl has the hots for you, you will know. There's the subtleties (leaning into you, looking at your face for long period with a beaming look, her touching you, laughing at your jokes even if they aren't funny, etc). If this happens, you won't have to work very hard.

    I wouldn't think too hard on IOI's. Women will feel attraction many times to guys they talk to. She may talk to 10 guys a nite at a club and if 3 of them are teasing her, challenging her, being playful, etc she might have felt some attraction for them.

    So attraction is not that big of a deal, but only few guys will have the skill or the know how to intensify those feelings into something more - an unwavering desire to sleep with you.

    Here's another thing, there are many girls out there who are flirty as well. They may be attracted to you, but there is also a chance that they will be attracted to another guy more.

    Is there a way to test her attraction for me? How can I be sure?

    First, you should always be confident and your mindset should be that you have complete belief that she is into you. Like delusional belief. Always.

    If you are being playful, funny, challenging, self-amusing and top of your game, she is going to be attracted to you. Even if she claims she is not, but you have been on your best game, you can look her in the eye with confidence and man her "Bullshit. I'm awesome. I can see you are intrigued right now."

    The other way is compliance. For example, consider changing locations and isolating her from her friends. If she is willing to move around the bar or w/e with you that is a killer sign of attraction.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    Awesome, thanks! So basically, focus less on IOIs and focus more on building on Attraction they are feeling for me. I usually carry myself with confidence and interact with most girls pretty easily, but I never considered having the mindset that they are already attracted to you (and chances are many other guys in a day).
    I have a girl in my class right now who seems to be pretty into me, constantly staring at me, teasing me, calling me names, touching, etc. but is one of those girls who can walk up and get along with anyone. We also take the same bus in the morning with my best friend who is also considering gaming her.
    "Fidelio"

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    Default Re: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    I had a similar question when I first started gaming. I used to classify almost each and every response of a girl as an IOI or IOD. Especially when texting since I couldn't focus on her body language at all.

    Over-analytic much you say? Well, maybe...

    After some small successes, I realized those classifications aren't that important. I stopped caring so much and started to go with the flow instead.

    If I'm interested in that girl, meh, that's pretty much all I need to go to the next level. After some point, I didn't care if she's interested in me at some point of our interaction, because I knew, she eventually would.
    It's not about who I was or who I'm going to become.

    It's about who I am. Do it right here, right now.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    All you need to look for is if she's smiling and having a good time...that's it. Too many guys overanalyze these "IOI's". Of course there are really big ones, like anytime she touches you and she could have avoided it, but smiling and having a good time is all that matters.

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    Default Re: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    Thanks you guys, I appreciate the timely responses and will use all your good advice!
    A little update too, I missed class today so my friend and the girl in our class went to grab something to eat while I woke up and went to meet up with them. She gave me pretty good reason to view everything as IOIs, from constantly touching me and my face, staring and me and sitting on my lap. We went out again as the three of us for dinner and she held hands with me the whole night and was all over me. I walked her back to her place at the end of our date (which she openly said was a date) and closed with a kiss.
    I also got her number earlier on in the day. Any advice to keep me on the path to making her my girlfriend?
    "Fidelio"

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    Default Re: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    Quote Originally Posted by xHITCHx View Post
    Thanks you guys, I appreciate the timely responses and will use all your good advice!
    A little update too, I missed class today so my friend and the girl in our class went to grab something to eat while I woke up and went to meet up with them. She gave me pretty good reason to view everything as IOIs, from constantly touching me and my face, staring and me and sitting on my lap. We went out again as the three of us for dinner and she held hands with me the whole night and was all over me. I walked her back to her place at the end of our date (which she openly said was a date) and closed with a kiss.
    I also got her number earlier on in the day. Any advice to keep me on the path to making her my girlfriend?
    You seem to be doing fine with a k-close and number close. I would sugest sending texts every now and then that sound like random thoughts with humor, T-Mal has some good suggestions. I guess you will continue to see her around campus, and my advice would be to keep you time together with her fun.

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    Default Re: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    Don't ask her to be your girlfriend. Just do gf/bf stuff without labelling each other for now. The game never stops. Continue flirting, make it fun and tease her as usual. Kino, kino, kino.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    You're doing great! Next time you hang out with her f-close. If you're unsure how, read this. http://www.puaforums.com/how-seduce-...rough-lmr.html

    You're in the clear my friend! Just keep doing what our doing and stay confident!

  10. #10
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    Default Re: IOIs VS Friendliness: What's the Difference?

    Hey everybody, another update . . .
    So today she sat beside me in class today and was touching and rubbing me the entire time. She also was leaning on my shoulder and just overall being very affectionate in public (we also stopped on the way before class for her to grab a drink). My teacher made a comment about her today that put her in a really angry mood so the bus ride back I had to run some pretty hard game for just a bit of affection. Later we went back to my friend/wingman's place to chill as the three of us. Any chance she had when my friend was gone she would make out with me and kiss me. The only weird thing is when we headed to take her to the gym she started talking about "hot guys" and is always on Tinder when we are together. I'm really confused now as like I said she is very forward and outgoing but treats me like her bf, but at the same time she brings up other guys a lot. I'm gonna take her out as just the two of is for coffee tonight after the gym if she obliges.. Any thoughts or am I just overthinking everything too soon?
    Last edited by xHITCHx; 09-18-2014 at 05:40 PM. Reason: spelling
    "Fidelio"


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