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Thread: Making Contact After Date But with a Twist

  1. #1
    simonsays812 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Making Contact After Date But with a Twist

    Hey Hey,

    So the dos and donts of how,what and when to contact a girl after your first date is a topic of debate. But here is a specific scenario that does not get mentioned a hole heap....
    Using her Job, Profession or Hobby as a way to re-initiate contact.

    Lets face it, we come across a mixture of different personality types when in the dating scene. Fact is some dates go great, whilst others arnt so flamboyant. Lets focus on a certain aspect of game post date.
    scenario) Date went okay, good or great!
    Say the time period between your first date and your next date is 4 to 7 days away. Ideally, you want to keep those attraction levels high from day 2 but without seeming needy. Whats your views on initiating contact during that 'waiting period' in between dates. But focusing on the reason of contact being about something she has passion/extensive knowledge in? Views Please?

  2. #2
    meteora's Avatar
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    Default Re: Making Contact After Date But with a Twist

    Whats your views on initiating contact during that 'waiting period' in between dates. But focusing on the reason of contact being about something she has passion/extensive knowledge in? Views Please?
    there doesn't have to be much of a waiting period. as a matter of fact, I would argue that most women expect you to text them within 48 hours.

    heck, some of my female friends seem to think that if you're not texting them the next morning that you're not interested or something...

    now, I don't usually care about what women think, so i'll text them whenever I feel like it. (and honestly I hate this notion of constantly entertaining the chick over text that so many guys seem to be doing these days...)

    as for having a reason, you don't need a reason to text the girl, she knows why your messaging her.

    I usually like to keep it simple and be strait forward with them.

    something like:

    me: hey, I was just thinking about you.

    her: how so?

    me: I was imagining how nice it would be for me to cook breakfast for you after we wake up together in the morning

    her: and what makes you think that's going to happen?

    me: because you're a sucker for romance :P

    her: lol you're right about that

    me: good, that means you'll come drink with me tonight? i'll make you breakfast tomorrow

    her: sure, just remember, I like my eggs scrambled

    me: don't worry, they'll be scrambled by the time I'm done with them

    her: lol i'll be sure to keep that in mind.

    me: alright, come on over.

    her: will do.

    and that is how I text girls, I always go for the meet up. no sense in using texting to build useless extra comfort.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Making Contact After Date But with a Twist

    Waiting usually ends up with momentum loss.
    But ALWAYS text with a purpose. Which should be to set a meet up, or to flirt & continue building attraction.

    Don't talk about work/school/hobbies.. at least not in the early stages. Save that for rapport... and AFTER attraction is established.
    Otherwise you risk sounding like every other lame dude messaging her, seeking common interests & hoping to build a meaningful connection too soon.

    Texting is a tool that should be used for maximum success... not for blowing yourself out by boring her to tears.


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Making Contact After Date But with a Twist

    I agree with meteora. I HATE texting for useless banter and to "entertain" a woman. I have a flip phone and I'm a busy guy. I don't have time for texting all the time.

    In fact I get sh!t from women all the time on my texting habits. They say stuff like "You're horrible at texting" or "you never respond". This is a good thing! It drives them crazy and gets them too wonder what you're doing!

    Think about it. All these guys are constantly texting attractive girls and trying to "entertain" them. When you don't give a sh!t and sometimes don't respond (because the convo is basically over anyways) it drives them nuts.

    I like to do the same as meteora and only text for meet up. I'm also straight forward and sometimes use that exact opening text. Another thing I like to do is text them after you know they've gotten home from the date with this "I hope you made it home safe!'. They always respond with something like "I did! Thanks direct! :-)" Then I'll say "Good! :-)" or I don't respond. They LOVE this. It shows that you care and that you're making sure she's safe.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Making Contact After Date But with a Twist

    I totally agree with DIRECT here... because it fits HIS personality & style; even though I'm totally opposite.

    I use texting all the time. But, I use it as a TOOL & it fits MY personality. I flirt/tease/banter over text, as well as keeping the line of communication current.

    However; the key is to be somewhat unpredictable. So I mix up the response time & I'll change gears without warning.

    I will admit that because I'm in a committed relationship & live with my GF, my texting style is toned down a bit & I do have conversations / exchanges that are more fluff talk now... (and inject a little more mushy-gushy stuff) but I NEVER completely quit gaming her over text & in person.

    I still send silly texts & things to spark emotional reactions in her.
    Why?
    Because it's FUN!

    It's true you should never OVER-use texting. (I've done that throughout my learning experience.) But also, don't totally ignore the power at your fingertips.



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  6. #6
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    Default Re: Making Contact After Date But with a Twist

    Quote Originally Posted by T-Mal View Post
    I totally agree with DIRECT here... because it fits HIS personality & style; even though I'm totally opposite.

    I use texting all the time. But, I use it as a TOOL & it fits MY personality. I flirt/tease/banter over text, as well as keeping the line of communication current.

    However; the key is to be somewhat unpredictable. So I mix up the response time & I'll change gears without warning.

    I will admit that because I'm in a committed relationship & live with my GF, my texting style is toned down a bit & I do have conversations / exchanges that are more fluff talk now... (and inject a little more mushy-gushy stuff) but I NEVER completely quit gaming her over text & in person.

    I still send silly texts & things to spark emotional reactions in her.
    Why?
    Because it's FUN!

    It's true you should never OVER-use texting. (I've done that throughout my learning experience.) But also, don't totally ignore the power at your fingertips.

    That's the big thing here. You need to find your own style that fits your personality. There's many ways that work as long as you figure out what works best for you.

    The key is to pick up on concepts that apply to you and use them. T-Mal and I have very different styles but we both get results with our styles because they are congruent with our personality. I have learned allot about texting from T-Mal but I picked up concepts that would fit me. I've even used a FEW of his opening texts with great results but I then switch to my OWN style.

    I like that T-Mal mentions that he breaks some of his texting rules now that he's in a committed relationship. You should NEVER stop gaming your girlfriend but the "rules" don't need to be as rigid once you're in a committed relationship.

  7. #7
    meteora's Avatar
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    Default Re: Making Contact After Date But with a Twist

    I will admit that because I'm in a committed relationship & live with my GF, my texting style is toned down a bit & I do have conversations / exchanges that are more Fluff talk now... (and inject a little more mushy-gushy stuff) but I NEVER completely quit gaming her over text & in person.

    I still send silly texts & things to spark emotional reactions in her.
    Why?
    Because it's FUN!
    tmal, this is golden. you should totally write a guide about maintaining long term relationships and keeping them from going stale.

    (I myself haven't ever dated any girl for more than 4 months because things always seem to get stale and we just get bored with each other right before a mutual breakup)

    (witch I'm perfectly ok with, because I'm not ready for any long term commitment to anyone or anything at this point in my life)


    That's the big thing here. You need to find your own style that fits your personality. There's many ways that work as long as you figure out what works best for you.
    direct is spot on as usual

    I think lots of people try to be something they're not just to get women and that is not what I'm here for.

    be unapologetic and go after the life you want.

    if a woman can't handle that you like to go for a run every day, don't quit running for her, tell her she can run with you or she can get lost.


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