Following my previous thread on getting a woman addicted, I would like to create a new one on the randomness of female attraction (I am getting very philosophical, lol).
Yes, yes, PUA doctrine says that attraction is not a choice. It is something that can be provoked by pushing the right switches, and I totally agree with that. Nevertheless, I still believe there are some factors that we cannot do anything about.
I have observed 2 things about how women feel attraction: 1) it is fleeting and can fade away really fast 2) it is sometime provoked randomly.
1) A woman may feel attracted to you at some point, and if you do not deliver and reciprocate during that precise time-frame, then she will lose interest and you will never ever get a second chance. Once you blow it, it's over.
This has been a problem for me on several occasions, because I need more time to get to know the girl and also decide whether I want to date her. Many women nowadays are impatient and get bored if they are not kissed by the 3rd date.
Many other guys can provide testimonies of the same kind. This temporal element does add randomness in how women feel attracted. There's no way to determine for how long they will be interested in you.
Take this example of mine. I met this chick at a cocktail almost 1 month ago. She was flirting a lot with me and I n*closed that night (it was a work-related event, so it would have been inappropriate for me to escalate). I wrote to her and she was replying quite promptly during the first days. We tried to meet for drinks but we never managed to meet in the end (she claims she is too busy, which is also true because I know some of her coworkers). I have been trying to arrange something for a while now but she always replies to my texts with a 1 week delay. I think this is a lost cause and have already moved on, but it is a good example as to how a guy can fuck up if he doesn't act fast enough.
2) I have observed that women might dislike you (or not see you as a potential bf) at some point in time, but they might miraculously start to like you and see you differently at a later point in time (let's say a few months/years later). Now, this has happened to me and I could never tell what was the point that turned the tables around.
For example, I was friends with my ex for a whole year. After the first 6 months, I confessed to her (how beta of me, lol) and she rejected me but we stayed friends nevertheless. 6 months after my confession, I noticed that something was changing. She was attracted to me and suggested that we started dating. She claimed that "something was different" and that I was more "manly". I swear to God I was my usual self when we last met before we had that discussion. She was just visiting my city, so I was showing her around and deciding where we would go and what would we eat.
I refuse to believe that she saw me as an alpha just because of how I behaved on that specific day. My personal belief is that it's just an excuse she used to justify hooking up with me. She was at a point where she would either lose me or keep me (I didn't set an ultimatum, it's just happened that she had to make a choice because otherwise we would start losing touch with each other).
Ok, this is more an anecdotal incident, but I have heard similar stories from other guys. Some woman would dismiss a guy at some point, only to feel attracted to him some years later. I am not talking about the cases where the guy became someone successful with a nice job, car and house. I am talking guys that didn't change too much about themselves, and yet those same women that rejected them, were reconsidering whether they should date this guys.
It's so ironic that these women refuse to acknowledge their own lack of coherence. It's the same guy FFS!! Which brings me to the fact that women don't seem to know what they want and mostly act on impulse.
I know guys that were really pissed by this change of behavior ("oh yeah, now I am good enough for you? Well, f*** off!").
The question is whether there is any way for us, guys, to reduce the randomness factor.
About the time limit: Is there a way to bounce back or is the opportunity really lost forever?
About the sudden change of mind: What is the reason behind it? What can we do about it?
Thanks in advance for any input!