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  • 1 Post By lenric

Thread: Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

  1. #1
    Xecutioner88 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

    Hey everyone! Long time stalker, first time poster.

    To get some advice I need to tell you my little story with this hb10.

    A few weeks ago a friend of mine introduced her to me by giving me her phone number. Started talking through texting and occasional flirty phone call for 2 weeks, she lives very far away from me (3 hour ride to get to her town). So that's why I had to text and call for so long.

    We finally set up a date to meet. I went to her town with the excuse of having to resolve some paperwork problems related to my career (doctor). It was a lie but I didn't want for her to think that I did a 3 hour ride solely to meet her.

    We finally meet. Go to dinner, have a great time. Escalated properly physically (although no kiss-close). Talked about common interests, relationships pov, Past LTRs. i went a little overboard saying that i had a crush on her (with a playful smile) every time she said something i really digged.

    After the date was finished we agreed to see each other again the next week. the same night i tell her i had a really nice time, and my visits to her town were going to be a lot more often, to wich she replied "thanks for everything"

    Next day she texts me to have a nice ride back home. pretty standard, no excitement or signs of interest, i said thanks and asked her how was her day going and from that point on she started replying with one word texts. i decided to end the convo before it seemed i was reaching out too much for her.

    2 days after the date i send her a pretty cheesy message around 10pm saying:
    ME: "random message to let you know you are in my head and it has me smiling"
    Hb10: Heyy!!, awwwww
    ME: Whats wrong?
    hb10: well nothing. i just didnt know i could make someone so happy.
    ME: Well thats good to have me smiling, especially if i want to do the same thing to you.
    Her: hahaha
    ME: Damn, you are pretty dry, you dont give me any signs of attraction whatsoever.
    Her: Yeah, im like that, a bit complicated .
    ME: OK.

    i believe i messed up with that last message and made a decision to freeze her out for 3-4 days.

    Brief story about her: all she knows is LTRs (wich is why im digging this girl so much, im done having the occasional hookups). she broke up with her last BF 8 months ago from a 3 year relationship. she sounde pretty over him so i dont think it becomes a factor in my course of action.

    Started the freeze-out 1 day ago with the hopes of she texting me before the 4 days deadline i established. if she does not reply ill initiate contact with a text, or call? havent really thought what to say or act like.

    I really appreciate any advice on how to handle this situation.

    Thanks a lot for reading my long ass-text and taking the time to reply!

  2. #2
    lenric's Avatar
    lenric is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

    You're freezing her out why? Because it's her fault that you fucked up?

    Man, your meet was boring. You spent 6 hours in a vehicle just to talk about your common interests and past relationships? Well, you could have done it with any friend of yours.
    You should have flirted with her, built attraction, not talking about her past or whatever, because no one gives a damn about it.

    And obviously she said it was ok to meet again, she's not a bitch.
    After everything, you even sent her a message telling her that you were thinking about her. One date. No fuck, no kiss and you telling her that is lame.

    Freeze outs should be done when your partner/date fucks up. In this situation, you're freezing her out, because she's not attracted to you, because of your inability to make her attracted to you.

  3. #3
    Xecutioner88 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

    Thanks for the prompt reply @lenric

    I did flirt with her, teased her a lot imaginating situations where both of us were together. All positive answers. Held her hand, brushed her hair in a sensual way. Went for the kiss (she turned away and said she doesn't kiss on the first date.)

    I'm sorry I didn't state that earlier. My doubts are if I acted correctly AFTER the date. She's not being very receptive towards my texts.

  4. #4
    lenric's Avatar
    lenric is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

    Her rejection could either mean that she wasn't attracted to you, or because of logistics. According to what you say about her single worded texts, I'd say you haven't flirted properly.

    Regarding your texts, I've already told you what I thought of them, but I will say again: they were needy.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

    Lenric is pretty spot on. You should be more honest with yourself... The simple fact that you lied about your work / career to cover up the 3 hour drive means you dont value yourself enough to say i'm gonna have fun with a girl regardless of what she thinks of me because i know how to have a good time. If you are covering up for what sounds desperate then you are pretty desperate and its likely to show under a massive layer of conversion
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  6. #6
    Xecutioner88 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

    Thanks artandale . I did notice that (it is partly why I'm asking for advice)

    I do know my texts where pretty needy (I said it in the first post) . That's why I'm planning on the freeze out. But I came here for advice. I'm asking what you think what my next action should be.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

    Well she doesnt seem creeped out... Or disinterested so meet up again and see what happens
    Every moment counts, get out of your head and enjoy it.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

    Alright then. Thanks for the advice. Do you think I should go ahead with the freeze out? Or text her sometime today?

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Great first date. ocassional dry texting, considering freezeout.

    I agree with them bro, its no reason to freeze her out cause you made a mistake texting her and fear you cant recover. What ever you do don't apologize unless she makes a big deal about it. Just re-establish contact and take it from there. also her LTR's mean nothing. You might not share that together. in fact she could turn out be a shyt person and just a fling. Don't approach the situation saying your tired of dating and you need LTR because that desperation will likely land you in trouble.
    * think about it bro, She broke with her man 8 months ago thats awfully long to be without SEX* especially if they were having sex for 3 years. He may be hanging around there somewhere. If you gonna be hoping for LTR's keep your eyes peeled.* Don't question her about this just build attraction and sexual tension everything else will come after. You establish a open line of communication to her immediately Though, The sooner the better.
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