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  1. #1
    wildstorms's Avatar
    wildstorms is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default How to diffuse this situation, sh1t got way to serious over just text

    I've been txting this girl from my workplace for the past 4 days or so.
    We flirt a lot at work and so I went for the number close. Now the thing is first 2 days were great, building bits of connection.

    I tried to get her to qualify herself once before we started txting heavily even, but she flunked it hard at work, which meant not much attraction I believe (correct me if I'm mistaken)

    Third day I went for the kill and told her that we are going to meet up for sushi the next night, she gave me mixed signals and yeah w.e flaked the next night, which I expected, because she didn't say no or yes the previous night.

    The qualifier question went like so "Describe two unique qualities that make you different from all the other women, and they can't be about your looks." Funny thing is the night she flaked, after I txted her "ok enjoy your night sweetie! ", about an hour later she kind of reverse pulls that qualifier question and asks me "So what makes me different from other girls"?" to which I said "I will tell you in person", she demanded I tell her but I just left her hanging after that.

    Tonight she txts me and she bangs me hard, putting me on the defensive, which I don't think I failed but I didn't pass either. She asks me the same question this time with added names from girls from work, and what makes her different from them. Went from warm laughter and connection texts to very serious quick. I didn't answer again and GET THIS I tried to steer it back to funny connections by starting it off with a cliffhanger starting like so "Hey you won't believe this" she instantly replies "Believe what? That you actually flirt with every girl at work?" LOL WHERE DID THAT COME FROM? I just told her a funny story from the cliffhanger to avoid answering that one. See after that I kind of didn't know what to say. (Questioning my loyalty, I'm just a player to all these girls at work?)

    So I threw out a question in which if she ever caught a friend of hers cheating on their boyfriend and if she tried to stop them (From a carlos xuma book) which she replied "yes why do you ask" ( Basically I was trying to flip the script here a bit, I tried atleast lol) I then told her there is no way I would date a girl who doesn't value loyalty, basically trying to get her to qualify again which got a response like "Ok, but why are you telling me this?" didn't work but after that I left her hanging again.

    So what does she want at this point, shes trying to qualify me to qualify her? I don't get her. ALSO I was going to answer her question since she won't stop with something along the lines of the following:

    What makes a girl different are three things, a good energy, intelligence and a great personality, eh you got 2 out of the 3 its a start, but you are ahead of the other girls . Something like that, not sure if that is a good idea.

  2. #2
    marvilo's Avatar
    marvilo is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to diffuse this situation, sh1t got way to serious over just text

    Sounds like fun a interaction. You just need to not let other girls figure out you flirt with the others, don't make it obvious next time... Now since it's too late for that you just got to forget about the qualifying for now and build comfort again, make her feel special and not like the other girls.
    You lose some you win some, learn from your mistakes and get better!

  3. #3
    wildstorms's Avatar
    wildstorms is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: How to diffuse this situation, sh1t got way to serious over just text

    Quote Originally Posted by marvilo View Post
    Sounds like fun a interaction. You just need to not let other girls figure out you flirt with the others, don't make it obvious next time... Now since it's too late for that you just got to forget about the qualifying for now and build comfort again, make her feel special and not like the other girls.
    Yes sounds like a plan. One question though, I feel that answering her question would make her feel a bit special. However I did tell her I would tell her in person, do I just let it hang till I see her again or should I break that rule and just tell her now over txt? Only way I can think is by the example from the OP, which Isn't putting her on a pedestal but making her feel that shes got a bit more edge over the other girls. I understand why she's behaving like this, and yes me flirting with the other girls at work has a little bit to do with it but not 100%, however I agree I need to make her feel special, at first she already qualified once before I asked her the "what makes you special question," So maybe I don't need to bother with that at all and build more comfort. I don't know, but what do you guys think of the plan.

    Any other things I can say to make her feel special? I think mines is decent. (But I'm not sure what else to) Anything better I can say maybe?


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